Take my wallet and I'll slap you in the crotch!!!

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Geo: 40.1638, 13.9513

Crappy hostel breakfast. Very stale croissant. Caught the early train to Naples and left my bag at the hostel. Off to the ferry for Capri. Going to be an expensive day - getting to Capri is not cheap!!! Naples looked nicer today - the pollution had cleared up a little bit. The sky was kind of blue ... or more of a blue-tinged grey.

Had a butterfly cookie at the ferry terminal. Nothing special. Not a nice ferry ride - too smoggy or foggy (I'm not sure what it was). Munched on nuts and cookies all day ... I was trying to lighten up my backpack a little bit by getting rid of some of the dead weight.

The Blue Grotto - ultra-touristy and more Disney than transcendent! Still, it was very beautiful but not worth the extra 8.5 euros to take a rowboat from the boat to go inside for 6 minutes. They make a killing there!

Many people were snapping photos inside ... I'm quite sure that none will turn out. The light comes in from underneath, making the water glow blue. It wouldn't surprise me if there are blue lights hidden down below! Wasn't really worth it in the end, but I guess it's a must-do in Italy. I'd never do it again ... unless maybe if a beautiful Spanish girl asked me to! Heh heh ...

I must admit, Capri is beautiful. I hiked to the Arco Naturale - amazing! I wish I had brought my camera. It was like staring through the eye of a needle into the ocean. I ate a canned Mexican tuna salad for lunch as I admired it. These things are great in some ways - cheap, filling, though the flavour could be much better.

The Let's Go guide - the Capri map is the worst one ever! They tried to combine a map of Capri Island with a map of Capri town. Just a jumbled non-sensical mess! Kept hiking to the Faraglioni islands. Nice, but the Arco is much better.

The water is beautiful - too bad I didn't have time to swim before catching the ferry back. Maybe next time! Back in Naples ... the sun was out. I realized that Naples isn't that bad. Perhaps I had misjudged it. And then ... on the bus back to the hostel, some guy tried to pickpocket me! Naples never fails to disappoint.

The guy kept bumping into me. And as I got off the bus it felt like he was trying to push past me, but never managed to get by. I thought it was odd so I looked back and saw his hand going into my pocket (the one with only a map inside). I glared at him and slapped his hand away. Only I missed his hand and hit him in the crotch. Score! But sadly it wasn't very hard (the force with which I hit him, not something else you sick, twisted perverts!!!). He kind of went "hey!". Dumbass.

I guess I was just frustrated with Naples and snapped. The worst part? On the way off the bus I was trying to check out a little Napoli-hottie but he interrupted me. A shame, because she was definitely "Worth a second look", but I never got to do that.

Back to the hostel for a shower. Traded Wilde's book for "Nausea" by Jean-Paul Sartre. I've heard of him but know very little about him. Now is the time to find out, I guess!

Bought some groceries and watched music videos while I ate at the hostel. I copied Claire's meal in Positano - wraps with meat and cheese and tomatoes. The capicolla was hard and waxy (no good) and wasn't spicy at all. Tomatoes were sour but still decent. The cheese was the best part but it kept falling out of the wrap. I washed it all down with some juice (the only good and quick way of getting nutrients and vitamins, I find).

It was actually a fairly expensive dinner - for the same price I could've had a nice pizza dinner, but I needed a change. As I ate and watched videos one of the hostel workers sat next to me using the internet. He suddenly sprang from his chair and went to the reception desk for seemingly no reason. Then I saw why ... a cute brunette from the UK was standing out there. I don't even know how he knew as she was completely out of view. But I can't blame him as she was also "Worth a second look".

So, I survived Naples. After 4 nights there (a necessary evil for the purposes of exploring Pompeii and the Amalfi Coast) it did grow on me .... like toxic mold!!!! At least the hostel workers were interesting ... there was the grumpy guy who deep down was really nice, but wouldn't admit it. And the other Norman Bates-like guy ... kind of scary and creepy, but funny and entertaining at the same time.

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Photos

a
The view from the hostel. There's a market just outside in the daytime but everything clears out around 6 PM. Don't let the picture deceive you - the tents are hiding piles of garbage. And the piles of garbage probably hide piles of dead tourists.

b
Today I bid farewell to a friend. Not a good friend, but really, a friend that you don't like but can't seem to get rid of.
So goodbye to you, LEGGEE (Let's Go Guide Eastern Europe). Your crappy maps, uneven hostel recommendations, and missing/outdated info will not be missed. Usually people don't speak ill of the dead, but there really is no redeeming quality about you.
I would use you for toilet paper, but unfortunately, even the sandpaper-like buttwipe found in Eastern Europe would be preferrable to using you. You would probably only give me a terrible rash.
I hope you are not like a Ouija board - I would crap myself if one day I am digging through my backpack and find you staring back at me like a ghostly, ghastly apparition.
Farewell! It was not nice knowing you. I only hope I can rid myself of your Italian cousin soon. To hell, where you belong!