Oversized Butterflies and Shlepping

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"Why am I doing this?!"

Here's what happens to me every time I travel. It hits me 1-5 days before departure, like a dark feeling of dread, like an oversized butterfly flapping it's huge oversized wings inside my stomach. Aloud and silently I repeatedly ask myself, "Why am I doing this?" Then, while I battle the oversized butterfly, I mope and sulk. People who don't know me probably think I don't want to go on whatever trip it is I'm packing for. But it's not that I don't want to go. Not at all. It's simply that I detest the packing. Now, since I travel a fair amount, I've thought a lot about this. And after much consideration, I've concluded that what I really, REALLY detest is disconnecting from my familiar routine. You see, I find, as I've aged, that there's a growing comfort in familiarity. This is fine. But as a result, I find that my love for travel is constantly waging war with my growing love to stay put.

Even more than detesting the packing, I detest the shlepping of my bags through the airport to the Baggage Counter. I know, I know, it's not that far from the curb to the Baggage Counter. But truth be told, shlepping anything anywhere is not, never has been, my strong suit. I'm more of a throw-a-backpack-on-my-back-and-go kinda gal. And for this trip, because it's long term, I'm shlepping not one, but three suitcases. Three, fully packed, 20-30lb suitcases. Flap away oversized butterfly.

However, having said all of that--the detesting the packing; the detesting the shlepping--after all of that detestation, I know that once I check my bags, get my boarding pass, jaunt happily away from the Baggage Counter, arms fully liberated, and with only my backpack on my back, I KNOW that my brain will shift into a whole 'nother mode. Euphoria will set in, excitement will ease the flapping butterfly, and all will be well.

But.....that's then, and this is now. Now meaning, four days to departure. Right. So anyway......where was I? Oh yeah. "Why am I doing this?!"

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Comments

[Julie Walker]

‘nother mode
So happy to follow your new ‘nother mode! Travel safe and enjoy ?

[Lynn]

I get it
I totally get it, Denise. As I have gotten older, the pull of traveling has been tempered by the pull-back of staying with the familiar. I hate the day or two leading up to the departure. It is so stressful. But once on the plane or on the road, all is good. I applaud your adventurous soul. You are an inspiration! I can't wait to hear all about your adventures.