I have always wanted to go travelling - but was held back by a lot of doubts and insecurities. My friends and my family were telling me how dangerous it is to travel alone. I know anyone here would say "just go before you regret it". Honestly - I was hoping to embrace backpacking slowly eg go travelling with a partner for my first few trips before eventually going solo because I have zero experience. On the other hand, if I cant get someone to travel with me - I will never start travelling. I am just so torn right now. Should i just take the plunge and just go solo?
Reply to this Hello Dannique 😊
For those who are not completely reckless, travelling is not even nearly as dangerous as many think.
What to do about our significant others attitude about our travelling is a frequent question on this and other travel sites. People want to know how to reassure anxious parents and if what their friends say is true about it being stupid to give up jobs and financial security and will they be able to hold onto their partner while travelling for extended periods. So you are certainly alone with your concerns.
Yes, make plans to travel solo. Consider which memories you would like to have when you are 80 and start creating them now.
Friends and boyfriends do not always remain committed to travel plans like the more driven travelers so even if they make noises about wanting to travel with you consider that they may bail. If you want to ease yourself into it gently then make your first stop Thailand. While being exotic(if you are not Thai that is) it is a relatively easy place to travel in especially for female travellers(presuming you are female?). You also would not be short of company there because it is a popular backpacker destination.
Mel
Reply to this I did my first solo trip this year at the age of 38. I had done a bit of travelling but nothing extensive. I went to Bangkok and a few surrounding towns for about two weeks (I'm from Canada). Here's my advice ...
1. do some planning in terms of what scares you the most. If your biggest worry is that you are going to get lost then research ahead of time how to reach particular places ... that definitely set my mind at ease and by the time I got to Bangkok I felt like I knew the city already;
2. if travelling in a country where they do not use our alphabet, use a guidebook that has tons of photos so you can point to them when navigating with taxi drivers and such. I had printed out stuff too that had the names and addresses of certain places that I knew I would have to take a cab to in Thai (and the hotels can do that for you too)
3. use common sense like you would if you were at home; and
4. most importantly, tune out all the people that tell you it's crazy for you to travel alone. I had quite a few people tell me horror stories (nothing they lived themselves just stuff that a friend of a friend of a friend ...) which I found quite rude and inconsiderate. Just tell yourself that you know you can do it and that you are prepared if something does.
In the end, it was the best experience of my life and I'm already thinking of the next one. Sometimes it's fun to prove people wrong and to prove to yourself how smart, capable and self-sufficient you are!!! Just go and enjoy it!!
Reply to this Hello Mel and Carfour,
Thank you so much for your messages!
Yes I am a female and I am from Malaysia. I went for my first solo trip to Hong Kong last week. Almost everyone I know was telling me horror stories and how it was crazy and weird of me to travel alone.
And yes, it was pretty much intimidating at first reach Hong Kong even after I spent a month doing research on how to reach the places I wanted to go. But I gained back my confidence pretty soon.
Now I can pat myself at my back because I finally overcome my fears on travelling alone. And it's not a difficult or dangerous as it seems.
Reply to this I say definately go it alone. You wont have to deal with anyone arguing with you or telling you what you can and cant do.
You'll quickly meet people who are in the same boat as you and most people are friendly and will let you tag along. It'll be just as good as going with a friend except, you're not tied to them in any way! If youre worried about approaching strangers to make friends, try posting on a few forums like this one to arrange to meet up with someone who'll be there at the same time as you.
I find it funny actually, cos i just booked a round the world trip (im going alone) and I didnt think twice about it! Now you lot are making me feel like a freak cos im not worrying about it! :P
Reply to this Hi Tori!
Yes I agree with you that I do not have to deal with anyone arguing with me =)
Is it easy as it you say - approaching strangers to make friends? Won't you feel a bit wary when some stranger approached you out of the blue? I know I will :P (I am not sure if it's because of the culture differences)
I felt like I was freak when I was in HK because everyone was travelling with partners/family/friends/tour and I was alone.
Reply to this Have you been to uni? You can draw a little comparison... i.e. when you're a fresher, everyone else is in the same boat and so approaching any random person is fine, expected and more often than not appreciated! I find this can often be the case in backpacker hostels.
When travelling its very similar. Yes, if a stranger approached me at home i'd be wary, but somehow when travelling its different. Particularly if youre in backpacker bars and on tourist type tours. People are really open to meeting new people. (Although you have to judge it.. i.e. dont intrude on the guy whos just about to make a pass at some girl!) In fact its probably easier being a girl cos we're not seen as predatory as some guys are
Last year I was in Toronto by myself so rocked up at the bar in a nearby hostel (tip: book hostels with bars and social spaces where you can meet people), bought a drink, plonked myself down next to a couple of guys and said 'can i join you?'. Some times you dont click with the person and if thats the case, you can just leave. (If youre not comfortable approaching guys, go for girls and just say youre on your own, can you join? You'll soon get the idea if youre not welcome and can move on. It'll probably be the case that there will be other people on their own which are even easier to approach. You could even chat to the bar person/ tour guide... theyre paid to be friendly!)
When I was there, I *thought* people were there in groups but it turned out a lot of people were there alone too. So its just a matter of being brave. I personally think its fine to approach groups, cos i know if i was there with a group, i'd be welcoming to someone wanting to chat (providing it wasnt a sleazy guy :P)
Im fortunate cos im very confident anyway, but if youre not, its a sure fire way of building your confidence!
Reply to this Dannique.
My wife and I recently finished a year long round the world trip which took in Asia, New Zealand and south America.
On our travels we met quite a number of fellow travellers who happened to be women travelling on their own, one an ex nun and another a lady in her 80s.
If you do decide to go alone rest assured that others have beaten the same path before you.
Reply to this Mell wrote
Friends and boyfriends do not always remain committed to travel plans like the more driven travelers so even if they make noises about wanting to travel with you consider that they may bail.
Sadly this has been true for me. I was talking about traveling Europe before I hooked up with my current partner. Once we'd been together 6 months he said he was keen to go with me he just needed to get things sorted with his house so I put off my plans. Two years later and we still haven't gone anywhere and he's still making excuses for why he can't leave for more than 3 months (I plan to work for 12 months overseas). I'm disapointed that I he won't come, and I'm disapointed that I waited for him.
I'm not waiting anymore.
Reply to this Hei!
People have been bailing out on me since I was 16. At that time I was planning my Inter-Rail around Europe. 3 Years later I was supposed to do a surf trip through South Europe. Again...people bailed out...Well surfing is not that nice on the Med anyway. I waited and waited and waited some more. Only did the Inter-Rail thing 10 years later...alone! That was in August 2008. ehehe. Was feeling doubtful and a bit afraid I reckon. It was AWSOME!!!! I did a little bit of research and stayed in Hostels and with friends. Did 9 countries in 22 days and returned to Portugal with a nice grin on my face. I spent 2000euros during that month (inter-rail ticket included). Along the way I was never alone. I met groups of people that were really nice and taged along, most of the way, with backpackers just like me. Eastern europe was bit dodgy lol food but one can adapt easily...Pizza Hut is everywhere :P Now seriously...Miss Carfour's advice is ace! You need to plan ahead and do a lot of thinking in terms of budgeting, places to stay etc...Since you are an english speaking native you could take the TEFL and work around the globe. The pay rates arent that great but then again you can see a lot. Check this website for example http://www.teachenglish.co.uk/
PS: Oh almost forgot...stop making execuses and GO! 😉
Cheers!
Bragança
Reply to this Traveling alone as a single female, do you think it's dangerous or not?
Reply to this Hello Samantha 😊
Traveling alone as a single female, do you think it's dangerous or not?
I dont think it is nearly as dangerous as many say or think. If you get to know as much about the local culture as possible before you go, it can go a long way to keeping you safe. ie know what the local women do to keep safe.
Mel
Reply to this Hi guys, first post for me!
I'm a 22 year old male and I had the same issues, people have said they were up for travelling but have come up with poor excuses along the way!!
So . . .about 2 weeks ago I booked my RTW trip . . .alone . . pretty daunting but I feel so much better about the whole thing now I have a plan and a set itinerary. I spend a month in New Zealand during April and just cannot wait. I think it doesnt matter about being alone because my girlfriend is offering support all the way (she cant come due to teaching course commitments), and most people in NZ hostels will be in the same boat.
Its certainly cool seeing like-minded people on here!
Reply to this PS - I understand its not quite the same for me not being a solo female! But as soon as I booked it it filled me with so much more confidence!! Go ahead and do it!
Reply to this To answer Samantha's post ... I would say to just go and experience and you will surprise yourself. So no I do not think it is dangerous.
I went to Thailand for about two weeks all by myself and leading up to it all of these people were telling me horror stories. I have wanted to travel my whole life and have never been able to coordinate with someone to actually make it happen so I thought what the heck I'm doing it because life is way too short. Well a few weeks after my completely safe trip to Thailand where nothing remotely scary happened to me, there was a horrific incident that happened on a Voyageur bus going from two well known towns in Canada (which is where I am from). Long story short ... a man was essentially attacked and beheaded and all of this in my very sedate, quiet, safe Canada!! Had I said that I wanted to take a Voyageur bus through Canada, nobody would have blinked an eye ... moral is that there are dangers everywhere but the odds that it's you are pretty slim too.
Pick your countries based on your level of comfort, do tons of research, pick hotels with internet so that you can stay connected to the home base, tell the hotel staff where you are going every day before you leave, register with your embassy, take a million copies of all of your documents but most importantly DO IT and HAVE FUN. I know I have!!
I am off to Cambodia and a few days in Vietnam in about a month and I am sooooo excited and once again doing it on my own. And truth be told, I love the fact that it freaks people out but I've also had quite a few comments about how inspiring and brave people think I am. That strokes the ego and motivates me to just keep going!
Reply to this Haha, well that's awesome. And a very valid point that there are dangers everywhere, even where we live! I hope that in the next year or two I can travel, so hopefully then I'll have some stories :D
Thanks for the thoughts! And good luck in Cambocia and Vietnam :D
Reply to this Wow, it's great to read through this thread. I am also travelling alone this summer and am glad I chose to do this. I'll be free to do virtually anything I want without having to consult the group or someone else travelling with me. Some may call it selfish, but I don't think so. I have worked very hard, am getting sick of the same routine, and am ready for something radical!
My final destination is Sierra Leone, but I have a stop in London, where I'll be for a week. I'm thinking of seeing the city, taking a trip to Belgium and Paris, and then making my way to Sierra Leone. It will be awesome to book hostels, ride the trains, and step way outside my comfort zone!!
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