#Fab5 loose in the deserts and canyons

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April 27th 2015
Published: June 25th 2017
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Geo: 36.0846, -115.172

All the alarms were ringing at 7 am to make sure we were up and at em to get the shuttle bus. Showers, packing, checking out, breakfast and a quick run down the street to get to the Sheraton for the pickup. No worries, we were at the LUX bus station and checked in with time to spare.

The #Fab5 was treating this as a rest day. Relaxed and with nothing to do but watch the highway spin by - although Denise took some time to work on the movie production. Von was sneakily working on something else! And, as always, was keen to share. We were enjoying free drinks and snacks from the not too friendly hostess. The time and the miles flew by quickly and we broke the journey up with a very quick stop over for lunch.

Before we knew it we were dragging the bags along the street in a sprint to The Flamingo! We lined up with about 300 other people for an early checkin and for the princely sum of $20 we had the key and were in 22001 two hours ahead of official checkin.

And WOW, she was a beauty. Floor to ceiling windows with a view over the pools. A very very pink bed. Glass partitioned bathroom, two lounges, a fridge and Internet access. We were in Sin City heaven. Lots of bouncing on the bed and screaming, followed by the gathering of the Vegas rings and Water bottles.

We have left our mark on 22001 - some of us more personally than others - and if ever the CSI team come in to solve a murder - there may be a chief suspect in the #Fab5. I am sure we can explain what happened - it is indelibly etched in our minds.

Somewhere in all of this Jan was feeling a little flat. Something was missing! In the quick exit from Portofino in Anaheim one important item had been left behind. What a booby she is!

team conference. This is serious. No worries - let's call the hotel and see what we can find out. It went something like this:

Edwardo:Good afternoon Portofino, Edwardo speaking.
Jan: Hello. I was a guest in your hotel last night and I left something behind.
Edwardo: No problem what was your room number?
Jan: We checked in so late I don't know...it was in the second building on the fifth floor.
Edwardo: What did you leave behind?
Jan: My prosthesis
Edwardo: Your what?
Jan: A prosthetic breast.
Edwardo: ......(silence)......I beg your pardon, can you repeat that?
Jan: A breast
Edwardo: Right. I will put you through to housekeeping.

Ricardo answers the phone.....are there no women in this hotel? And the whole story is played out again. Only, this time Ricardo says that so many things are left behind it would help him to have a room number so he could narrow down the search.

Are they kidding?!? Jan instantly quips with the straightest voice possible "How many prosthetic breasts have been handed in today?" We are all assuming that if it is only one...it is sure to be Jan's.

I am sure you are already gauging the sympathy level in The Flamingo. The other four are going nuts with laughter and have their own versions of boob jokes ripping around the room and to top it off break out onto a chorus of "We're going on a boob hunt......gonna find a big one....can't go over it...can't go under it...I'm not scared." All fuelled by very large, very cold and very delicious cans of margaritas.

And so the Portofino team were left to hunt down the missing item. And at last, we got the call back. They had found it (yeah), it was wedged behind the bunk bed (which they had to dismantle to be able to retrieve said lost property) and Ricardo reassured Jan by saying "I will hold onto it for you." Can you imagine the conversations and jokes for the Portofina staff.... Would have been the best day in housekeeping EVA.

But life does have to go on and the #Fab5 hit The Strip with energy to burn. First order of business was to find show tickets for the night and we settled on the Michael Jackson Tribute Show and made our way south towards the Mandalay. Took in a dash by look at Bally's, Paris, crossed over to the Crystals Arcade, took the overpass to New York New York and danced on the Brooklyn Bridge, skirted the Excalibur and Luxor and took the tram to the Mandalay and were feeling great because we had made it by 6.40 for the 7 o'clock show. We had booked online and presented our booking number only to be told we were at the a WRONG show in the WRONG casino at the WRONG end of The Strip.

Seriously? We made a scrambling run for the cab rank, luckily jagged a crazy Latino driver and took of Fast and Furious style ride back down the highway swerving and braking to make it to the Stratosphere at 6.58!

Now, have to mention we had started cooling down with some drinks just a little earlier and some of us were doing a little better than others. The Flamingo water bottles also double as wine skins. Now that's handy. I know what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas but I have to tell you that in the 500 strong audience of the MJ Tribute show only two people we up dancing. One in front of the booth doing all the moon walk impersonations and one ON the booth doing "something."

We rolled out of the show and headed to Roxys. What a restgreat place. Simple food, fabulous service and all of the wait staff sing! So every 23 minutes we are being serenaded. It is all just too good to resist. We are singing along and before we know it Carolyn and Jan are up dancing showing all the diners how it's done. The Sensible one spots a nearby table with 5 male diners. She quietly slips over and tells them her friends always think they are the "wild ones" and that she needs a partner to show them up! And yep, she gets a volunteer and twirls and swirls him around the floor much to the delight of all onlookers. The manager is thinking about hiring us for tomorrow night's entertainment...but we duck out before he can finalise the contract.

Remember, we are in Vegas. And as weird and old and noisy as we seem....there are others that take the cake. And we met lots of them on Fremont street. The two nuns with pasties accompanied by the man in the undies and triangle bikini top takes the cake. This is so off that we can't look....well not more than three hundred times anyway ...and they seem to be everywhere! We saw Elvis and Michael (at least they were dressed), topless cheer girls, topless Indians, topless playboy bunny girls, topless Chippendale strippers and topless showgirls. At one stage we thought we were the only ones with clothes on! There were beads and bangles, baubles and balls, gold chains and bling. The bands were playing, everyone was dancing and singing in the streets. It was an assault of the senses.

And if all of this weren't enough, the #Fab5-1 decided it would be a great idea to climb into the roof of Fremont Street, strap yourself in a harness and fly over the crazy crowd below. So that's what they did. (This activity came highly recommended by The Sensible One!)

And it was exhilarating. The #Fab5-1 #Do60 with style. And with a bit of luck they will remember it tomorrow. Anyway, we have a couple of blurred pics that sort of look like them playing superman.

The band was great and we did have to drag ourselves away but it was nearly tomorrow already! One more cab ride - a drama at the door trying to get in and with feet screaming for mercy it was bedtime at last! Sweet dreams #Fab5....and headaches permitting.....time to do it all again soon.

#Fab5 #secrets #theNaughtyOne #mateskeepyousafe #highflyers #berocca #lostandfound

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