Derbyshire 176 - Chesterfield - Feelings come and go like clouds on a windy day

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It is always a lovely feeling to wake up and be greeted by a gentle thought . Thich Nhat Hanh had come up trumps this morning with his thought for the day . It was about feelings . I felt like staying in bed. Lying there , turning over and going back to sleep . I did not feel like wandering round the shop walking the aisles looking at food I did not fancy to eat . I was still mortified . France cancelled . Another holiday gone the same way as the last . Another date booked . Anticipation hopeful that third time lucky would apply knowing full well it the holiday would be cancelled again . I didnt turn over though - I ripped off the thought from yesterday and read . A gentle thought . "Feelings come and go like clouds on a windy day " It went on to describe a yoga technique but I skipped that and got up preparing breakfast before I left for the shopping . It comes round again so quickly . Day 158 Wednesday . Half way through the week .

My feelings were all over the place as I drove . Have your feelings been like that? One minute on a high . A holiday planned then the next feelings dashed to the ground . In pieces .I hoped I could park . I always do . But in the back of my mind I feel a sense of impatience with everyone . Have you felt that way? One minute happy with the world and the next at odds with it . Feelings are funny old things . I wondered if I was less or more patient now in our new Covid world ? Probably a little of both . I felt impatience with the managers in the shop hanging about . Talking to each other as I battled the soap, medicine and toothpaste aisle . Three out of four not wearing masks , I wanted to get one out and offer it to them . I felt like getting out a tape measure . My feelings were running high when I got to fruit and veg and had to battle through the staff , few masked up , many talking cheek by jowl. Hanging about with shopping trolleys . I felt queasy by the time I got to the tinned sections . By the time I got out I was hot and bothered . I was offered a biscuit by the girl on the counter. She said she was fed up. She felt queasy and needed a biscuit . I laughed and told her I felt the same .

It was work day and time to forget holidays and get on with the day to day stuff. Hard to do . Perhaps tomorrow my feelings would be improved and I would come to terms with no travel .

Thursday - the sun shone with a strange glow . As I stood watching the trees they turned a shade of Autumn . Golden and bronzed . The green had disappeared . The nights are getting longer . The days shorter . The sun moved and Autumn disappeared . I don't know where it went to but the leaves turned green again . Holidays are on again . Not France - no we are heading up north . As far as Scotland . We dont want to go but there are few places left that you can find campsites or night stops . I wonder if Covid has made people selfish ? Booking weekend after weekend away . Not giving a thought to sharing the sites all round . A grab of whats available leaving nothing for anyone else . We can drive to Darlington and settle up for the night . As I swam I started to moot an idea around a journey up the east coast . Not having been much to Northumberland there could be much to see . In Scotland it is midges season . The little blighters create havoc particularly on the west coast and in the highlands. Note to self keep away from the bitey things . I read they are called No see ums in the USA . Now that sums them up perfectly .

Friday Day 160 Booked the first night of the holiday at the The Old Farmhouse Pub . They welcome motorhomers as long as you frequent the pub and buy more than just a drink . We will be careful . It is easy to spend more than the campsite fee. A couple of wines, two main meals and you are over £25 now that sadly the Eat out to Help out scheme has finished .

I like the idea of feelings being like clouds . I just need more of that wind to blow them away and let some new clouds in . Preferably soft white fluffy ones .

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