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Published: April 28th 2007
Almost 25
Lunching in the sun in Buenos Aires Do you ever look in the mirror and not recognize yourself? I mean, do you ever look outside of yourself and realize you’ve changed so much? That happens to me every once in awhile. I cannot believe who I have become. When you’re a kid, you know your family, your school, your friends but you don’t really have a greater sense of what the hell is going on beyond the safe confines of your own little bubble. As a teenager, you start to figure out there’s a whole wide world you’re a part of and you start seeing yourself in it. In your mid-20s, you’ve hit milestones and you have goals; you can envision the future. You can take the time to reflect on where and who you’ve been and where and who you’re going and becoming. I am pleased at the progress I’ve made since I became conscious of myself within the world, and I realize there is still much work to do. It's evolution and I feel I'm on the right path.
Sometimes, though, I am still startled by the image reflected while brushing my teeth. Who is this
woman staring back at me? I used to
Being silly
Just b/c you're older, doesn't mean you should stop having fun!! :) think 25 was so old! My friends are getting married and having (or have had) babies. They’re in medical school, law school, business school, public health school. They’re on their own and working. They’re forging and cultivating relationships that could, potentially, go the distance. This is real. We are so lucky and truly blessed.
For awhile, I've felt the need to move to new cities to see what piques my interest. I think to myself, Maybe here I'll figure out what I want to do with my life! While I'm there, I make friends. I find my favorite hang out spot, my coffee shop, my gym, my bar. I find all those things. And then I leave them behind again on the great search - for what, exactly? For myself? For meaning and passion and purpose? I'm realizing I have to stop looking outside of myself and my surroundings for that sense of purpose. Those things are in front of me, inside of me, waiting to be discovered, waiting to be awakened. Waiting for me to slow down and be quiet enough to realize they’re there. I had to take this trip in order to get there. While I'm
Laughter keeps you young
Angela and me cracking up about something. Who even knows what was so funny?! still not certain of my role on the planet, I know that wherever I go, I'll take it with me. I’m happy to be in the position to take a few months off of work without too much worry and check out a new part of the world, but I’m feeling ready to get back to get started on whatever is next.
And I'm learning a few things along the way. I'm learning to not sweat the small stuff and to find the silver lining on life’s challenges. I'm learning to stop (or at least reduce) the micromanagement and over-thinking of EVERYTHING. And I'm learning to ask for what I want instead of waiting for someone to offer it to me.
25 is bigger than it seems. It's more than just a number, more than just another birthday. It’s a good place to stop for a moment, take a look around, and decide if you like what you see. And if not, to change it. It's a time to take stock of what experiences you've had and which ones you want to have.
In the end, I want what everyone wants. To love and be loved. To
Being silly
Just b/c you're older, doesn't mean you should stop having fun!! :) feel necessary and important. To make an impact on someone else’s life, and through that have my own life altered.
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William Jones
non-member comment
Blessings
Jamaica it is so wonderful to know that you are doing so good. I've read all of your blogs and it seems that you are having this amazing time. I envy you. Not really. I'm glad that you set off to do the things that you wanted to do and travel the world at an early age. Most people will never get to experience that in their lifetime. So enjoy these precious moments. My family and I are praying for you on your journey and asking God to continue to pour out his Blessings upon you. Take care and I miss you "J". My Bestest Supervisor