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Published: September 7th 2013
We had a long lie in this morning. Very Relaxed! For breakfast we went back to the Pioneer Grill
where we’d had dinner the night before. This is the best diner ever. There is just one long diner counter that wraps back and forth again and again through the restaurant. Plus the food is pretty agreeable.
It’s a good thing we hadn’t planned much for today other than to try and do a few “housekeeping” chores. They take a long time. Especially when you are in a new city trying to find your way around and dealing with crap Hertz
customer service. Our two mission objectives for the day were to change the oil and do our laundry. So we went to the Jackson Hole Airport Hertz counter. Error. The unambitious, unmotivated, uncharismatic, unhelpful trout behind the counter offered these words of inspired wisdom when we inquired about getting the oil changed. Wait for it...
“We can’t help you.”
Say, what??!!? Customer service fail. Epic fail. After about 20 questions I only managed to weasel one piece of useful information out of the miserable cow. I needed to call corporate. What a waste of time. The douche from corporate customer service advised us to find a place to change the oil and ignore the contractual requirement for it to be a Hertz certified provider since he didn’t know what that meant. FFS. You wouldn’t think that this type of question would fox the staff this way. Firstly, all cars everywhere require an oil change at regular intervals. Secondly, the company contractually requires these changes every 4,000 - 5,000 miles. Get your shit together Hertz.
So, we drove into downtown Jackson and I used this time to get my own shit together following what could only be described as a sense of humour failure. Thanks to Google Maps we found Jackson Hole Express Lube
. Unfortunately, there was nothing “express” about it. After more than an hour of sitting around in the little office we finally had our car back and half of the day gone with a heaping mound of festering laundry still waiting to be dealt with in the boot of the car.
Next up. You guessed it. We found the forebodingly named laundromat, The Missing Sock
. The great thing about a laundromat is the sheer size of the machines allowing us to put all of our laundry - which would have taken 6 or 7 cycles at home - into two washers. Praise be for this because half way through the cycle a woman came in with her three demon spawn who proceeded to race each other around the laundromat screeching and giggling and thrashing about. I could see the look on Jon’s face. He wanted me to have my tubes tied right then and there. This experience has forced us to seek out more underwear for Jon. I'd be willing to make him wear each pair twice to avoid this experience every 10 days but buying a few more is probably the better option.
To add something a little holiday like to our day, we made a scenic detour through Teton Pass and the Mountain Ski Resort Teton Village. We will definitely be returning one winter. What a beautiful place in the summer - must be even more amazing covered in snow, we’re sure.
As a reward for our daily labours, we spent the evening in the hotel bar, The Blue Heron
. Where we met some new friends tonight. A herd of elk were moving through the fields and all of the patrons were craning their necks and squinting their eyes to get a glimpse. I borrowed some binoculars from one of the waitresses and offered them to the lady next to me.
Tina: “Are these yours”
Tina: “Did you steal these? You must be from Chicago!”
I don’t know what this says about Chicagoans but we had a good long laugh about just how accurate her comment was. Originally from Chicago, Tina now lives in Memphis with her husband Frank. In addition to the top tips for our visit to their home town, they broadcast our recent nuptials to the barmen and the entertainer who played Sweet Home Chicago and Harvest Moon specially for us. We disappointed some and filled others, I’m sure, with great relief, when we refused to get up and dance. This honeymooning can be pretty fun.
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