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Published: August 30th 2010
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Downtown Vegas
Freemont Street in downtown Las Vegas On the bus to Las Vegas we teamed up with another guy whom Mike got chatting to. It is weird how everyone that Mike meets is male, from London and heavily into football. The autopsy of various matches was going hammer and tongs so I caught up on some sleep.
We had to change buses is LA and there was a three hour wait. We got hungry and we decided to leave the relative security of the transit centre in search of something edible to eat. The moment you walked through the security barrier you were surrounded by beggars. I got talking to one black guy who had a degree, was heavily into English literature and was probably one of the most well educated people I have ever met. What the hell was this guy doing on the street?
On the way to Las Vegas a lady went into Labour on the bus and we had to make an emergency detour. When we eventually arrived the next morning and there were several things that hit us: the tackiness was obvious but the place revelled in it - it was what made Vegas Vegas. The next thing was how much
Downtown Gifts
What are we like? money there was. It was a place where no expense was spared and again it revelled in its opulence. Strangely the other thing that we noticed was how cheap it is, particularly eating out. After months of travelling on a shoe-string for once we could eat like kings and more than once a day. I could write pages slagging-off Las Vegas, but there was also lots to like. Also, given the fact that the reputation at the time was that Las Vegas was run by the mob, I think I'll concentrate on what there was to like.
The place might seem tacky, but it has got money seeping out of it. All the lights and glitz, which are the familiar image of Las Vegas, are in the down-town area, but that is actually the poor end of town and those casinos weren't actually that big. In fact they offered free gifts for you to stay in the casino for a period of time. We were of course up for that, and we came away with free watches, hats and other selected tat, having gambled very little.
The up-town area is where all the serious money is. Caesar's Palace
Police Car
What is he like? is all done out like a Roman city, complete with blokes in battle-dress and unbelievably fit women in unfeasibly skimpy outfits. I always thought that casinos were full of Roulette and Black Jake tables, so I was surprised to see that most of the space is taken up with fruit machines. Mind you the jackpots were anything up to a million dollars, and there was even a million dollars sitting in a glass case.
Each machine had an a woman sitting at it who was taking one dollar coins from a bucket, plugging them into the machine and then pulling the handle. When the bucket was empty, they would empty their winnings into it and start again. That was their holiday!
Above all the machines was an indication of the percentage pay-out, typically about 98%. So if you want a gamble, it makes more sense to go to Las Vegas than it does to waste your money on the National Lottery, which has a payout of a rather pathetic 50%. I went on some of the less expensive machines and my $1.30 change lasted about half an hour. Not bad value for money!
Next door to Caesar's
Uptown Vegas
Bigger casinos on the uptown end of the strip Palace was the Mirage, which was on the same scale. This had a simply horrendous false volcano outside it and the crowds gathered each hour to see it erupt. They also had two white tigers stuck in a cage. As far as we were concerned, putting two of the rarest and most beautiful creatures in the world in a cage was a complete crime, but of course I wasn't about to challenge the mob boss who could well be running the place about that point. It wasn't worth being part of the foundation of the other casino he was building.
The prize for the most naff thing that we saw in Las Vegas (and it was up against some pretty fierce competition) has got to go to the drive-through wedding chapel!
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