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Thomas County Courthouse
This statue stands in front of the Thomas County courthouse. I think it may reprent the town's ties to the civil war. I've just returned home from an exhilarating five-day adventure in Colby, Kansas. What? It's not the first place on your list of towns to visit before you die? It wasn't all bad. The people were friendly. It was sunny and warm and I took an educational lunch break with a group of fourth-graders to the Prairie Museum, home of the biggest barn in Kansas.
What was I doing in Colby, you ask? Well, I've always wanted to go. It's the oasis on the plains and I also heard the prairie museum was not to be missed.
In truth, I was offered a job getting people to sign up for Wal-Mart cards. Don't judge. It paid well and it fit right into the week after I quit my job before I take off for good. And I went with an old carpool buddy who recently returned from Argentina and had tons of useful tips to share with me in our downtime.
And there was plenty of downtime. We split our time between the Super Wal-Mart and the Super 8. The first day we set up shop outside the entrance to the store. It was the grand opening of the
new Wal-Mart store. We never had a lot of luck. So when someone looked mildly interested it got my heart pumping -- maybe, just maybe, maybe I'll have something to do for the next three and a half minutes.
A woman in a blue tank top, with ratty brown hair and four or five teeth walked, or waddled, straight toward us. She was even making eye contact. We had her. "We're giving away screw drivers and umbrellas (emblazoned with the adored Wal-Mart logo) when you apply for the Wal-Mart Discover card," I said to her.
"That's the Devil's workshop," she said smiling and pausing as if she were about to say something else. "That there is the Devils workshop. Credit cards are the Devil's workshop." She smiled and sauntered into the store.
"And we are the Devil's handmaids," Lisa said under her breath.
It was certainly hot enough to be the Devil's workshop. It got over 90 degrees the first day and just kept getting hotter. The next few days we parked it inside.
The people of Colby have found their center in the new Wal-Mart. Teenage girls were dropped off in groups at the
the Cooper Barn
the biggest barn in Kansas. door the way my mom used to drop me off at the mall or the movie theater. Couples could be seen entering and exiting three or more times in a day. Often people didn't buy anything but a drink to sip while they cruised the isles and socialized.
Our indoor location was situated in front of the dining tables where Lisa and I both had the pleasures of listening to different men's stories while they waited for the wives to finish the shopping.
On my lunch break one day I did check out the Prairie museum. I checked out the largest barn in the state, the old town school and church and a tribute to the famous opera singer who used to call Colby home. I wish I could remember his name, but I don't really follow opera so it didn't stay with me.
There was also a massive doll collection, much of which was relocated from a museum in California several years ago.
The highlight of the museum was the sod house. Though it was just constructed in 1984, it was indicative of how early settlers built homes on the treeless plains.
I took
a Wal-Mart sandwich along on this excursion and ate it at a picnic table outside the museum when I'd finished my tour. I no sooner sat down and started wrestling with the plastic wrap than I had company. I cat ran out of the bushes, "meow, meow, meow, meow," he said as if he meant, "wait for me, I'm coming, don't start without me. I want some of that. I'm like a teenage girl who talks really fast when I'm excited about something and won't shut up until you give me what I want."
He jumped up on the table and started nuzzling my unopened lunch. I quickly unwrapped it and tore the top 1/4 of it off for him. He ate the cheese and even went for the iceberg lettuce, but left the pastrami well enough alone. I guess he was a vegetarian cat. After another piece of cheese he jumped down and lounged in the shade. I went back to Wal-Mart.
Lisa and I discovered Twisters. It's a bar right across the street from the water tower. We were looking for outdoor dining. It was beautiful spring night and everyone in Colby was stuffed in the
dark musty bar, while we sipped beers and ate fried food by ourselves as if we thought we were too good for everyone inside. We went to Twisters three of four nights and were the only people sitting outdoors every time. Don't get it.
The second night, a huge group pulled up and started taking pictures of the place. Later a man with a profession video camera came outside.
"Do you have a media release to be filming here, sir?" Lisa asked him
"Yes I do."
Turns out this guy works for the History channel and was helping the Discovery Channel out by following a group of storm chasers.
"It's been unseasonably dry," he said. "There haven't been any storms to chase, so when we heard there was bar named Twisters we had to check it out."
Cool. Later we went insider and conquered all but the sports category of a computerized trivia game. Mike, a recent Howard University law school graduate helped us. He was stopping over in Colby on his way to start his first job as a public defender in Las Vegas.
When Sunday was over we said our goodbyes
and packed into Lisa's Jeep. I don't think I'll be able to look at Colby or any other little Kansas town the same way again. It's not just a rest stop, though I know I don't want to live there.
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BlackManx
Amy Hall
Funny
I enjoyed this blog, keep up the good work