I only stalk cute Spanish women

---

Geo: 55.9503, -3.18761

Sad to leave Santa Cruz today. There weren't many spots that I truly liked in the Canaries, but Santa Cruz was definitely one of them. I had trouble sleeping last night - I had forgotten my earplugs in the car. This sucked because all night long there were people outside talking loudly, and cars whizzing by. I'm not sure why there was so much car noise since I was on a pedestrian street. Maybe it was the ghosts again?

I didn't use my shower sandals today - my regular walking sandals are starting to reek, so I gave them a bit of a cleaning in the shower this morning. I hate the feeling of wet sandals, but I had to suffer through that for a few hours until they completely dried.

I went back to the bakery that I missed the first time in Santa Cruz. Mmmm ... I had the special Serrano ciabatta, a palmeira (saved for later), and some instant OJ. The cafes were starting to fill up - a little suprising, because of the relatively early hour.

On the way to the car rental office, I thought up a story I could use on the worker - I ended up telling him that I came in last night because the brake light was on, but there was nobody around so the cops let me into the secured lot. The guy checked out the car and of course, the brake light was fine - so he let me out and I was on my way. Why is it sometimes easier just to lie?

First stop - Candelaria. Its Basilica Nuestro Senora de Candelaria was just another basilica. The adjacent square was pretty neat, with its nine statues of Guanche warriors, standing almost as if they were protecting the people of Candelaria.

There wan't much to see here - next I was off to Guimar, little more than a drive-thru town. The only site of note are the pyramids - but I couldn't find them, and I didn't really want to pay the entrance fee anyway. No loss, since they were mostly rebuilt.

Next up - Puertito, a cool little town worthy of a quick stop. I ate the palmeira here. It was pretty average, not flaky enough. After that was Poris, a sleepy little town - not much to see here. The final stop in the Canaries was El Medano, a very cool kitesurfing town. Unfortunately, no one was out today because there was no wind. It has a very interesting vibe - despite being a little touristy, I like!

Off to the airport, where I waited over an hour to check in. The lady asked for a copy of my passport - I am getting tired of always being hassled when I travel! She sent me off to an office to get it photocopied - their machine was broken. They told me to go to a different office - it was closed.

Back to the line to explain the situation - she got on the phone with a supervisor and kept giving me quick, darting glances. Yes, I realize that I look like a criminal on my passport, but leave me alone!!! She just smiled and said nothing when I asked why they needed my passport. She disappeared for a while to make a photocopy - she returned with a copy but it was hilarious because the copy was completely dark, and totally obscured my face. I can see the news report - "Canadian male wanted for questioning in Tenerife. Suspect is described as looking like a giant ink smudge." All that time wasted for nothing!

Arrghhhh ... I finally got through. Though she was fairly nice about everything, I was still quite frustrated. I wouldn't have been so frustrated had she been able to pull of the Spanish "lookaway" maneuver that I find so hot, because then I probably would've smiled and hit on her instead!

I was probably the last person through when I finally checked in. To kill the little remaining time I picked up some trail mix for the flight, and picked up a fridge magnet. I also browsed through some CDs - I just started randomly copying down names of Spanish artists. I'll search for their music when I get home, but I just wanted a starting point to expand my Spanish musical tastes.

Boarding the plane - some more passport hassles from the police. But for once, I don't think it was entirely because of my dodgy appearance - he was confused as to how I entered the Canaries because I had no entry stamp. I explained that I flew in from Madrid and he nodded and told me to make sure I get it stamped if I ever return. I still don't understand the hassles - can't a guy just love traveling all the time without getting sh*t for it?

Sat next to a guy from the UK on the flight - he's from a town halfway between Glasgow and Edinburgh and was visiting his sister in the Canaries. On the other side of me was a girl that Tri would like. Sadly, there were no hot Spanish flight attendants on board 😞

Interesting - they had private hand-held TV terminals on board for rent - that's a first for me. I read some Spanish-language magazines (written in both English and Spanish - good practice!), slept a little, and did some journal writing. I munched on some of that trail mix when I got hungry.

Lots of turbulence on board today - stuff kept dropping out of the compartment above onto the girl seated next to me. And when we landed, a long piece of foam dropped from above and landed on me. I simply stuffed it back up top - hopefully it wasn't critical!

The plane arrived early and we were greeted with 5 degree weather! Cold, windy, rainy - I felt miserable but was happy to be in Scotland! Passport hassles again ... sigh ... "What are you doing here?", "What's your job?", "Why were you here before?" - I should be used to this by now ...

Funny thing - I hadn't see all that many Spanish-quality women in the Canaries, but one of the first people I encountered walking to the hostel was a cute, tiny brunette. She would have been right at home in Toledo! The hostel was pretty busy - I arrived just as people were gathering for a pub crawl. I needed to do laundry tonight - running out of clean clothing!

Grabbed a quick bite close by - kebabs were 6 GBP!!! What the heck? Instead, I got a pizza for 6 GBP and saved the leftovers for breakfast tomorrow. Chicken and mushroom - fairly good pizza with lots of oregano and crisp dough. It could've used more sauce, however. I watched CSI: New York as I ate, but only because I didn't have possession of the remote control.

It's a decent hostel - big chill-out rooms, plenty of big kitchens and dining areas, lots of toilets/showers, a flat screen TV in the lounge, board games, and stained sofas (I won't ask about those ...). But most importantly, the place was pretty clean (except for the stained sofas).

I left the hostel to go buy a bottle of water. Some girl thought I was stalking her - I was actually walking ahead of her, and stopped to look at a menu. She glared at me as she walked by. After I continued walking, she glared at me again just before ducking into the doorway of a pub. I realized that there was no shop further down, so I turned around and walked past the pub again. She then stepped out of the doorway and glared at me again. Sorry lady, but you're not cute or Spanish enough to be worthy of my stalking! What gives? She must've been a customs agent - they've taken to hassling me outside of the airports now!

Edinburgh is quite atmospheric, but you can't see much of it at night. I walked for a bit longer and returned to the hostel to remove my laundry from the machine - it was still a little wet, but I figured it would dry by tomorrow. Wrong - it's too damp here!

---

Photos

a
My room in Santa Cruz. I am happy to report that it wasn't haunted!

b
The special serrano ciabatta was good, though I don't know what was so special about it - the only difference from a regular sandwich was a bit of tomato sauce inside. Kinda reminds me of the Spolumbo's sandwiches that are always served at lunch and learns that I attend - salami, provolone, and marinara sauce - mmm ... Anyway, the bread was tasty. The juice - not really.

c
Taken just outside of Candelaria.

e
Statues of Guanche warriors lining the main plaza in Candelaria - from L-R: Tegueste, Romer, Pelinor, Pelicar, Beneharo, Comet, Cupid, Donder, and Blitzen.

f
Statue of Tegueste - he had kind of a forlorn expression on his face, almost as if knew about the impending doom of his people. Interesting.
The artist was definitely no Michelangelo - the style was almost primitive, but perhaps that was the intent?

g
Beneharo ...

h
... Bencomo ...

h2
... and Ben Santos, the fiercest of all the Guanche warriors! One look at his scary tongue and ghastly-pale feet was enough to send entire armies running away!

i
A palmeira, one of my favourite pastries. Sometimes when I'm happy, I like to pretend that I'm munching on bunny ears. And when I'm not so happy, I like to put ketchup on them and pretend that they're bloody bunny ears ...

j
These two nice old ladies were trying to convert my religion. Normally, I relish any opportunity I have to practice my Spanish - but this time, I decided to pretend that I didn't speak any. It's not their fault - I'm not easily convinced of anything. But they definitely would have had a shot if they had brought along their Spanish grand daughters ...

l
Roques de Fasnia - talk about a cool rock to live on!

n
Cool gas station - designed to look like a mosque! Also saw a couple of Spanish hotties here, making it an even COOLER gas station!

o
This might have been Puertito?

p
El Medano.

q
El Mejicano - this restaurant was named in honour of Ben!

r
Bar El Timon ... you'll never guess what they served here ...

r2
... Timon and Pumbaa!!! Timon was kind of dry and stringy, but Pumbaa was moist and succulent. A little fatty, though.

s
I thought this sign was funny. Yes guys, if you see crabs ... you SHOULD be scared!!!

t
One of the longest wooden piers in all of Europe.

u
Cool sand-blasted formations.

v
Can you imagine having this name? It's "Ugly Garcia" street!