Oktoberfest!

---

The train I was supposed to catch from Strasbourg was full - bugger. Luckily though, there were a series of trains I could catch without a reservation that left half an hour later. So after almost missing my connection to Karlsruhe because I was on the wrong platform in the tiny town of Appenweier, there were finally no dramas from Karlsruhe to Munich as I received a text from Andreas - the guy who was generously putting us up at his apartment for the Oktoberfest. It read: "I will wait for you at the platform - I am wearing a stripy yellow top, red pants and a blue scarf." Right, so I'm looking for a guy dressed up as a Mount Roskill Grammar rugby sock - shouldn't be too hard to spot then ;-)
Andreas is a good friend of another one of my old neighbours in Ponsonby, Saskia. I guess it was a good thing I lived in such an international neighbourhood back home! It was a good thing that Andi was wearing such a colourful outfit, as I had never met the guy before.
As I got off the train, I noticed a yellow square where people were permitted to smoke - a fag square. It reminded me of the pitiful smoking zone at the club we were at in Helsinki last week. I also caught a glance of a guy wearing red Baywatch shorts waiting at the end of my platform - proof that Germans still love The Hoff ;-) I then spotted Davies who also meeting me at the end of my platform.
I hadn't spotted a colourfully clothed guy yet - apart from the blonde dude in the Baywatch shorts, pale yellow stripy shirt and with a small light blue hankerchief thingy round his neck...
"Hey, are you Andreas?" I asked him.
"Yeah, you are Derek? Nice to meet you." Mission accomplished.

Andi was not what I was expecting - Saskia said that he was an IT professional with his own apartment in the centre of Munich so I was expecting an older guy, perhaps a bit conservative - not a blonde, surfer-like dude who was enthusiastically social.
"Did you bring your lederhosen?" Andi asked us. We hadn't, obviously.
"Well if you want to buy some, don't buy the cheap ones cos everyone will know you're a stupid tourist. You need to buy the better quality ones, that are around 150€. Then you will get respected."
Shit, we certainly weren't buying lederhosen then.
Andi was a really cool guy - he seemed excited to have us and certainly knew his way around Oktoberfest which was a good thing for us. He has a good sense of humour too (the fact he doesn't always phrase his English sentences correctly helps his cause) - definitely a good guy to party with.

This of course was my second time in Munich, having come here last year during the World Cup. Once again I got that cool feeling you get when come back to somewhere you've been before.
We got off the U-Bahn at Marienplatz, the main square in town where the imperious Rathaus took my breath away last year - and it did so again this year, as the memories came flooding back.
Except this time the main tower was covered in scaffolding for restoration. It seems almost as if every second sight we see in Europe is being restored. I might have mentioned this before but although this work is necessary, it's frustrating for the sightseeing tourist.
At Marienplatz we met Andi's friends Patrick and Mark, two cool guys who we would catch up with later on.
A ten minute walk from Marienplatz was Isartor, one of the old city gates - and the prime location of Andi's top floor apartment. The apartment itself was pretty kick ass too, a new and spacious pad with a characterful mezzanine. I even had a double bed to sleep on in the lounge - we couldn't have had it any better.
With three whole days at our disposal, and with the beer tents only two hours away from closing at 9pm, we decided we would not drink tonight, but would check out the festival site anyway.
The festival site is on a huge concrete field called Theresienwiese aka "d'Wiesen", and is a 30 minute walk from Andi's apartment. The walk takes in a few of Munich's sights too including the Frauenkirche, Karlstor, the neo-renaissance Justizpalast, and a walk along the main shopping street in central Munich, Neuhauserstrasse.

When we got to the festival, we almost couldn't believe our eyes - there were so many bright lights, we thought we were back in Vegas!
As well as beer tents, Oktoberfest is also about carnival rides - the last thing you'd think people would want to do after drinking all day (imagine how many people would've chundered on the rides!) - don't stand underneath them if you can help it! ;-)
But the whole atmosphere was wonderful, something for the whole family - indeed you only have to be 16 to come and drink here! So there were definitely a lot of (drunk) teenagers about as you would expect.
We thought we'd also pop inside a couple of the beer tents - which are more like beer warehouses - which can fit thousands! The tents are like full-on buildings, and construction of them starts months before the actual event. Most tents can seat at least 6000 people. Crazy!
Also crazy was the atmosphere inside.
By the end of the night everyone is standing on the tables, all singing in unison to whatever Bavarian classic the band is playing at the time - everyone knows the words to every song (the fact that the same songs seem to keep repeating all day, every day might have something to do with it). Just trying to walk around the tent is a mission in itself, as barmaids carrying unbelievable amounts of beer shout "vorsicht!" to anyone who happens to be in their way. Add to this the waiters carrying massive plates of roast chickens, sausages, sauerkraut and raw radishes (!) and the drunks stumbling their way to the "pissoir", and you have mayhem. It's definitely shoulder-to-shoulder stuff - not surprising when you take into account that 6 million people come to Oktoberfest every year.
This was just a taster as to what was in store for us for the next three days - and we were more excited than ever.

Everyone we had talked to who had been to Oktoberfest before had told us to go to the grounds early. So the next day, after stocking up Andi's fridge with food as our way of thanking him for letting us stay, we arrived at the grounds around 3.30pm.
We were too late. Every tent was full as we spent 2 hours trying to find a tent that had sitting space. You see, we were told that if you aren't sitting down, you don't get served. Any table that looked empty was "reserviet" and when we asked people if an empty seat was free we were met with a blunt "nein!". Add to this, barmaids carrying up to 12 one-litre steins (called "masses") of beer shouting "vorsicht!" at you, almost getting decapitated by gigantic plates of roast chicken, and being stuck in huge crowds walking around the tents - you suddenly become very unsettled and extremely frustrated. Note that this was a Tuesday - imagine the crowds on a Friday or Saturday!
There was one tent called the "Nymphenburger Sekt" tent which was a bit emptier, but it was full of old people so we thought we'd try our luck at one of the other 13 tents.
At 5.30pm we were waiting outside the popular "Schutzen-Festhalle". Half-an-hour later, and the queue hadn't moved. So we pretty much had no choice but to go back to the Nymphenburger Sekt tent.
With no problems getting in, we then realised that there was no way we were getting a seat - but luckily, this tent had a bar. So over I went - only to notice that this bar was only serving wine. However some friendly locals pointed me to another bar that was serving beer. So swimming my way through the old crowd, I finally managed to get to the bar and was promptly served two Paulaner Weissbiers, though disappointingly they came in pints rather than masses. However, beer tasted gooooood and the fact that we were finally drinking made up for the (relatively) small portions.
Having got a text from Andi asking where we were, I then asked a local what this tent is called, only knowing that the tent was called "Nymph-something" at the time.
"Just tell him you're in the wine tent", he told us.
The wine tent. So that would explain the old people, the relative emptiness and the smaller servings. "Stupid tourist" - we might as well have bought some cheap lederhosen.
Despite this though, the wine tent still had great atmosphere, and even had a Freddie Mercury impersonator - he is certainly alive and kicking here, as almost every tent plays at least four or five Queen classics every night. Other favourites include Robbie Williams' "Angels", Joan Jett's "I Love Rock N Roll", and Lynard Skynard's "Sweet Home Alabama". The rest are old Bavarian folk songs which get really tiresome...
While still in the wine tent, I bought a cigar for 2€ as well as a giant pretzel - it just had to be done I suppose.
What also had to be done was a ride - so we decided to take the Eurostar, but not back to London. On this Eurostar, like the Lethal Weapon ride at Movie World, your feet are dangling and the track is above you - it was definitely a fun and thrilling ride as you go up, down and all around at breakneck speed. You don't want to do it hungover though - that would be awful.

When we finally left the wine tent we met up with Andi in the beer garden of the "Augustiner-Festhalle". There he had saved seats for us - thank god. We were sitting among a whole lot of Andi's friends, with the main people I talked to being Laura, Sebastian, Stevie (who was a ring-in for Finch from American Pie) and Phillipina, whose birthday it was. They were all cool, locals as well - and fervent Bayern Munich fans ;-) They also explained to me why it was so busy today - it was a public holiday the next day, and many of the companies in Munich had reserved tables tonight for after-work functions. It was going to be crazy again tomorrow too. Great.

Augustiner is widely recognised by Bavarians as the best beer in Bavaria - the Augustiner brewery in fact does not participate in any advertising whatsoever - a truly refreshing stance in today's overcommercialised world. The locals also like the fact that the beer comes out of wooden kegs - the only beer at Oktoberfest to do so. The beer is excellent - definitely the best beer at Oktoberfest.
For the first time that day I was really enjoying myself - sitting down chatting with a group of locals, drinking masses (literally) of brilliant-tasting German beer - now this stuff I can scull. Unfortunately it was all too short, as 11pm had hit us before we knew it and the entire festival was closed for another day. However, it was Phillipina's birthday, so we were moving onto the Buena Vista bar.
Because literally thousands of people were streaming out of the grounds, keeping our group of twelve(ish) inebriated people together was a mission. I ended up getting into a taxi with two blonde girls I hadn't met before en route to the bar, and had lost Davies and Andi. Everyone knew where we were going however, and we all met up again at Buena Vista bar although at the time it seemed like a miracle. Once inside, Andi shouted us all some bubbly to celebrate Phillipina's birthday - what a sport. I then got talking to a cool guy called Alex and a really cool girl called Uli, Phillipina's best friend, who I was getting on really well with.
Too soon once again though, it was time to go, and outside I was once again talking to Uli, who was about to go home with all her friends.
With everyone outside, Uli then asked me if I wanted to go with her and her friends.
It didn't really make sense for me to share a cab with her and her friends if they weren't going to Andi's house, so I told her, "I should probably go with Andi, because I don't have a key to the apartment."
"OK then, so I guess you should go with him then", she replied. And with that I bade her farewell.

We then met up with Mark outside the bar, who we met yesterday and with Andi being the sport he is, he shouted us all McDonald's as by this stage we had the major munchies.
While chomping down my Big Mac, the thought then occurred to me - why would Uli ask me if I wanted to go with her and her friends? Ahhh, she probably didn't know I was staying with Andi and thought I might want to share a ride home.
The boys didn't think so - they thought I had turned her down.
Well I certainly hope not - because not only would I have turned her down, I would've turned her down with the flimsiest excuse ever - "I don't have a key". The fact that I could've just got the guys to let me into the apartment afterwards was irrelevant - "I don't have a key". So if indeed I did (unknowingly) turn her down, I must've looked like an absolute twat.
Was she asking me if I wanted to go home with her? I guess we will never know - but it became the running joke for the rest of my stay . "Derek - have you got your keys?", would be the question posed followed by raucous laughter. It would haunt me for the rest of Oktoberfest ;-D

The next day we were pretty hungover - German brau really knocks you you back.
Of course today was a public holiday, so we knew the crowds would be big again at the tents. So we thought we would check out a few sights first.
Walking past Odeonplatz, we eventually made it to the Englischer Garten, Munich's version of Central Park (it is in fact bigger than Central Park). It was a beautiful day, and very warm - at least 20 degrees, and I was wearing just a t-shirt and shorts for the first time since we left Spain. And the locals were making the most of the weather, as there hundreds out enjoying the sunshine, whether it be playing ultimate frisbee, football or just reading a book.
It is quite a beautiful public space, with it's own lake and river running through it and like Central Park has it's own attractions such as the Monopteros Temple, a children's carousel, and the Schonfeldwiese - the area of the park where nude sunbathing is permitted. I wasn't quite prepared for it, so it was definitely a sight for sore, hungover eyes.
We also passed the Chinesischer Turm, a 25-metre pagoda, beneath which lies a 7000 seat beer garden, the second largest in Munich. There were plenty of locals there too, enjoying a beer away from the crowds at Oktoberfest.
We just lay in the sun, waiting for our hangovers to subside enough for us to start drinking again. After a pleasant lie in the sun, we were ready drink again by 6pm.

We met Andi again at the Augustiner beer garden again where he was with a different group of friends.
Patrick who we met on our first night was there, along with two lovely ladies, Melanie and Caroline. It was another great evening of drinking and conversation and our waiter was a pretty cool guy too - he gave us all a free shot of Jaegermeifter and even sat down and had a beer with us. Melanie gave me two massive heart-shaped biscuits too. So of course I proceeded to eat them - "No, don't do that!", shouted the all the Germans - man, it tasted like shit!
"Yeah, they're like a year old", said Patrick. I must've been pretty drunk cos I just kept eating it ;-)
Once again the beer drinking ended too early - I'm really keen to do a whole day here.
However, Patrick was going to meet up with Mark before going to see Biffy Clyro play. Andi recommended that we go with them. We were kind of half-hearted, as there was still about two hours at the Oktoberfest to go. I had not heard Biffy Clyro before, but I knew they had a bit of a following, so I thought I may as well check them out.
Tickets were 16€, but luckily I managed to score mine for 10€ from a pint-sized emo girl outside the venue - sweet deal.
Biffy Clyro's brand of Nirvana-influenced rock was not quite my cup of tea however, and my proximity to the bar meant that I was just drinking the whole time.
After the concert we said goodbye to Mark and Patrick, both of whom were really cool guys.
I was pretty drunk - when you have a couple of beers at Oktoberfest, you get so used to the beer unit that a beer becomes a beer and you forget that each beer is in fact a litre.
Anyway, we thought we would try to go to some clubs near Ostbahnhof where Mark said there was a really cool place called Milk. Getting off at Ostbahnhof we walked around for a bit before finding a club called Matador. R&B and hip-hop was pumping out of the place but it sounded pretty empty so we decided to keep going to Milk. We couldbn't find it, but then a couple of locals told us that it was closed and that we should follow them to Club 21, so we did. The place had a 6€ cover charge - ah, what the hell, these locals should know what they're doing so in we went.
As soon as I opened the curtain to go inside, I realised that we had just been ripped. The only people inside were four guys.
We've never left a place as fast as we left that place - it was absolutely dead.
Anyway we had the major munchies so once we got back off the U-Bahn at Isartor, we stopped off at Burger King where we got talking to three Scots about rugby and football. Rangers fans they were, and they were over the moon that they managed to beat formidable French champions Olympique Lyon 3-0 in Lyon. I didn't believe it but congratulated them.
I've learnt never to talk up the All Black's World Cup chances, but the Scots were having none of it saying that we would definitely win it this time. "Here's hoping", I told them.
I decided to order an "Angry Whopper", chock full of jalapenos. In my drunken state though, they didn't taste that hot at all.
Well, it was a foolish choice as the next day I was absolutely sick - more from the jalapenos that were ripping through my stomach than from the alcohol. And when I think back at what I consumed that night - two litres of Augustiner, one litre of Paulaner Weissbier that tasted like banana milkshake (that couldn't have been good), a Becks, a shot of Jaegermeifter, one huge year-old biscuit, and a big burger with a handful of jalapenos - no wonder I was sick. That was one lethal combination. So don't ever do that people. Ever.

After all that, we unsurprisingly got to the fest late again.
Still sick, I still managed to drink 3/4 of a litre of beer at the Braurosl tent. We were standing again, but the waiter kindly got us a couple of beers - but I was really not enjoying it.
We then met up with Andi at the Schutzen where him and his friends were congregated right in the thick of the action, next to the band. It was an awesome atmosphere and everyone was on the tables, singing and drinking.
With Oktoberfest's international appeal, we thought that we would meet a lot of foreigners, but we didn't - everyone we seemed to be meeting was Bavarian, which was a real reminder that this is their festival - a celebration of their culture if you will.
And the Bavarian girls look incredibly hot in their dirndls (traditional Bavarian dresses). A posse of them got up on to the stage for a dance right next to us - lucky us. And I would say that over half the guys at Oktoberfest wear lederhosen - not that I felt out of place, but I would loved to have dressed up as well, if the lederhosen wasn't so expensive.
Unfortunately, the atmosphere still wasn't enough to make me feel any better, and being more sober than anyone around you is never fun, especially in such an atmosphere as this. So when the party finished, I was happy enough to go home.

We thought that we would have one last, big night at the Oktoberfest on the Friday - but once we arrived (late again) and walked around trying to find seats (again) without success (again), we had pretty much had enough and were completely over it, so we went straight home. Even Andi wasn't going along tonight.
Andi's friend Jonas then came by the apartment, where he was going to stay for the weekend from Ulm, a couple of hours by train away, and Andi and Saskia's hometown.
He was a really cool guy and we ended up just having a few beers at home and then Alex from the other night came over later on as well. It was actually a fun night as we all traded our funny travel stories. The highlights would have to have been Andi's stories from this year's Burning Man festival, including one where he played barefoot football with a flaming toilet roll resulting in second degree burns on his feet, and another where he ate some shrooms and pretended to be snake while forgetting it all the next morning.
So it was a low key ending to our stay here.

Overall, I would have to say that the Oktoberfest mission turned out to be a slightly disappointing one.
We always arrived too late - the best way would be to show up early, get a seat, enjoy a weisswurst, and then you are set for the rest of the day. Two full days would be the best way to it - you wouldn't probably be able to do much more than that. We were there for five days, and each day we would only be there half the day or for the evening with most of our time there spent trying to find seats - that was not fun at all.
However, I definitely want to come back - if anything my first experience has made me more determined to come back and do it right. If you do it right, then it will be the (most drunken) time of your life.
The best thing though, is if you're there with a large group of your mates - there will definitely have to be a Roskill Alumni Oktoberfest Mission one year!
So if anyone is planning to go in 2008 - let me know, and I'll be there.

That will have to wait til next year though - what doesn't, is Prague - where we are heading tomorrow.

So until then - prost!

Delek-Delek out.

---

Photos

Inside The Tent
Typical raucous atmosphere inside an Oktoberfest tent.

The Lowenbrau Tent
"Don't go in there", said Andi, "it's for all the tourists". It is mightily impressive from the outside though - remember that it's a tent!

The Rathaus
Munich's breathtaking town hall - well, it's breathtaking without the restorations anyway.

Turn On The Bright Lights
Oktoberfest by night.

The Beer Carousel
The carousel for adults.

Packed
There people absolutely everywhere at Oktoberfest.

Weinzelt
Inside the wine tent, where the shortage of beer most definitely did not create a shortage of atmosphere.

Freddie Is Alive
Freddie Mercury came back to life inside the wine tent.

Giant Pretzel
Had to be done, but the saltiness of it left my lips crackling dry. The soft dough on the inside is delicious.

The Eurostar
Not the one the goes under the English Channel obviously. We had a thrilling and enjoyable ride on this baby.

Andi, Davies and Me
At the Augustiner Beer Garden.

The Englischer Garden
Munich's very own Central Park.

Chinesischer Turm
Pagoda with it's very own scenic beer garden below.

Kleinhesseloher See
Lake inside the Englischer Gardens.

Me & Melanie
Me, Melanie and masses of beer.

Pissoir
No prizes for guessing what this means.

The Bavaria
The statue that symbolises Bavaria overlooks the Oktoberfest every year.

Beautiful Bavarians
Dirndls, are hot.

Isartor
One of old Munich's gates - and right opposite Andi's place.

Inside The Braurosl Tent
More scenes like this next year perhaps?

Casualty Of Oktoberfest
There were plenty of those. And how cruel is Davies? I did NOT take this photo ;-)

Rathaus Details
Wonderfully ornate detail adds to the Rathaus' splendour.

Puppets!
Only a kick-ass town hall has a puppet show on it.

Frauenkirche
Two-pronged church on near Marienplatz.

Justizpalast
The grand neo-classical Palace of Justice opposite Karlsplatz.

Autumn Leaves
The Englischer Gardens - Nice place for a romantic stroll