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Published: June 25th 2017
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Geo: 50.0553, 19.9274
Mission:
Berlin Hbf to Warsaw Centralina: Train 43 Dep: 09:37 Arr: 14:59
Warsaw Centralina to Krakow Glowny: Train 61 Dep: 15:56 Arr: 18:49
Andel's Hotel
Pawia 3
31-154
Karkow
Poland
Tel 0048 126600255
1 night Standard Double Bed & Breakfast
Status: Up and ready for action at 0600hrs. The trousers with the Orangina stains seem to have recovered well but only proper daylight will reveal any suspicious watermarks.
Berlin Summary: A city of 2 halves. (East and West) Sightseeing is good but hard work and spread out. Still very war torn feel. Public transport excellent but best explored on foot. You have to work hard and bad weather can easily become an issue. Big history points. Ready to move on.
News Flash: Fortified and cleansed by a large glass of "Mummy" Juice (and also "Mummy Safe"😉 we are now ready for the off....staff car booked in 20 mins to Hauptbanhof -weather looks grey. Update: 30 mins later: the true ingredients of Mummy juice are now becoming clear: concentrated fig and prune extract with a senapod top.
Machine of the day: At breakfast a strange coffee warhead was spotted. Known as the Penemunde V3 it had an upper capsule and was gently steaming.
Breaking news: Sad news just in from Chickenville. Lulu has sadly
faded in the history books. She was over 4 and had a good active life until recently.
Political update: The Russians are still not popular in Berlin and the taxi driver could not understand why we were heading "East". The sound of dread and foreboding was very clear in his voice. Apparently, the old East Germany is still lagging behind the "West" and the "dam Ruski's can have it back....together with their sh$t buildings. He was from Bavaria.
On the train: The German Rail System is amazing. Our train however was Polish and immediately we were back in 1970's Britain. We settle into a 6 person sliding door compartment reminiscent of a "Football Special". Our fellow travelling companions were a German couple with an overgrown teenage son who slurped his way through a chocolate milkshake as the train slipped quietly out of the station and onward through the Soviet style Eastern suburbs of Berlin.
Tickets please: A ticket inspector looking like Putin's bodyguard in a bad mood arrived and demanded our tickets. Much fluffing around and waiving of the wrong paperwork failed to amuse. Eventually, we procured the correct document and the prospect of 4 years hard labour evaporated. Other officials made
various appearances including an earth mother type with a clip board who initially I thought was after a "few bob" for a room for the night at the local doss house. However she explained she was conducting a survey about our journeys. Eager to impress Cathy dug out our impressive rail map and pointed to the Crimea. Not interested.
Nourishment Alert: We had carefully procured provisions yesterday for our travelling picnic. These included Kaiser Baloney - cheese - and small salami sticks. YUM. As our fellow travellers delicately nibbled on fruit and baguettes we unleashed our picnic.....Advice: NEVER underestimate the power of cheese.....EVER......What at first appearances looked like a innocent pack of kids packed lunch cheese turned out to be the "rotting corpse stink fest"
from hell. With a bouquet capable of knocking over old ladies at 400 yards, we had our fellow passengers gagging within seconds. Attempts to stifle the odour included stuffing the pack (giggling uncontrollably) into my rucksack wrapped in lead foil. However, as new passengers joined the train en route, this act just made it seem like we had both not washed for several months...... We left the offending pack on leaving the train (6hrs later) by squeezing
it into a small ashtray.......
Warsaw Transfer: Arrived Warsaw 1520hrs. Only 45 min transfer to Platform 3 for Train 1131 to Krakow. Just in time for a quick bathroom stop... WRONG.... Don't the Poles use Euro's...NO...Still Zlottes!!! Therefore we crossed our legs and headed for the next train! Only 4 hours to Krakow.
Arrived! Here we are sitting in room 208 looking out towards the Station itself. It's been a long day. Off to knosh in the old town and change some money.
Equipment Update: Kettle not yet used!!!!
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Viv
non-member comment
Ok-laughing uncontrollably at this point. It's not the other passengers I feel sorry for-it's the ashtray! Wish I was there.V