Me talk pretty one day

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Lunedi (Monday) 11 August 2008

The trip to Venice has, admittedly, been a bit of an emotional rollercoaster. One minute I’m flying high, sitting in front of Titian painting that has been in situ (in its original designated AKA holy site) since its creation, marveling over this work of beauty I had seen so many times in books. The next, I feeling lonely, overwhelmed, and truly worried that my poor grasp of Italian would eliminate my ability to do any real dissertation research.

One of the nicest personal self-affirming things I have done in Italy, which seems silly, has been to read for pleasure. As I began tearing through my fourth novel in two weeks (!!!), I found myself laughing out loud in bed (my landlady must have though I was pazza!) to a chapter from David Sedaris’ Me Talk Pretty One Day (2000). Bear with me, but I’ve selected some passages that beautifully illustrate my attempt to grasp Italian in Italy with the “direct method”.

(For those of you not familiar, the direct method is when the instructor speaks only in the language being taught, and if you are confused, the answer is explained also in this language. Techniques include drawing, gesturing, and all out pantomime. Sort of like Italian Charades…”Prima parola…Sonda come (First word..sounds like)” ) But I’ll let David explain …

“The first day of class was nerve-wracking because I knew I’d be expected to perform. That’s the way they do it here- it’s everybody into the language pool, sink or swim…

…I managed to mispronounce IBM and assign the wrong gender to both the floor waxer and the typewriter. The teacher’s reaction led me to believe that these mistakes were capital crimes in the country of France…

…I absorbed as much of her abuse as I could understand, thinking -but not saying—that I find it ridiculous to assign a gender to an inanimate object incapable of disrobing and making an occasional fool of itself. Why refer to Lady Crack Pipe or Good Sir Dishrag when these things could never live up to all that their sex implied?

…My fear and discomfort crept beyond the borders of the classroom and accompanied me out onto the wide boulevards. Stopping for a coffee, asking directions, depositing money in my bank account: these things were out of the question, as they involved having to speak. Before beginning school, there’d been no shutting me up, but now I was convinced that everything I said was wrong…

…My only comfort was the knowledge that I was not alone. Huddled in the hallways and making the most of our pathetic French, my fellow students and I engaged in the sort of conversation commonly overheard in refuge camps.
‘Sometimes me cry alone at night.’
‘That be common for I, also, but be more strong, you. Much work and someday you talk pretty. People start love you soon. Maybe tomorrow, okay.’ “

I couldn’t have said it better, David. Someday me talk pretty too.

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Photos

I just couldn't do it
I know what you're thinking- I have a thing for seminarians. What better than a calendar dedicated to hot seminarians? My Catholic guilt wouldn't allow it...

Bella luna
"I'm so lonely...and I wish I was the moon tonight." - Neko Case

Comments

[Dad]

You look pretty & talk pretty
Rachel, everyone back here is enthralled with your trip. We really enjoy seeing the photos of a place some of us may never see in person! We also enjoy your day-to-day encounters with handsome waiters, fellow students and vile tourists. We know your classroom experience is a challenge, but you will make the most of it, as you always do. You will talk pretty, just as you look so good in your sundress Keep those blogs with all those experiences coming at us!

[Mom]

I love the Hearts All Over The World. Would welcome more info on that. Hope today is an awesome day!!!! Love you so much - Mom

[Renee]

SO True!!!
That is often how you feel and sound with a language before it gets its meat hooks in you.;) Just keep reminding yourself of that refugee conversation. I know I will!! See how things are so much more fun when they aren't flawless?? It makes for better laughs, too!