Italy 2017 part III - Naples X-rated

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May 13th 2017
Published: July 10th 2017
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Uh oh! Big penisUh oh! Big penisUh oh! Big penis

That is a pretty large penis. He's got a "John Holmes" going there. Fresco in House of the Vetti in Pompeii.

Nudity and art

Disclaimer: In this blog post there are photos of erotic paintings, nude statues and large phalluses. If you find this disturbing I recommend that you leave this blog entry now and read something else. Because all material posted here is X-rated.

"Mr Pink: '...dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick!'

Mr Blue: 'How many dicks was that?'

Mr White: 'A lot'"

/Reservoir Dogs

Before anyone start accusing us for anything we might as well begin by admitting that we here shamelessly appeal to very low instincts, the sex drive, to get us traffic to our blog. We post a bunch of photos of erotica with the hope that you and other readers of this blog will find that it tickles your imagination and that you will read it in search for forbidden pleasures.

An advice on how to read this blog post. The text is not so important. You can read it, there is a funny thing in the end which makes it worth it, but it really is the pictures which hold the important stuff. I sort of tell a
An even bigger penisAn even bigger penisAn even bigger penis

A penis the size of a leg! That guy is so well hung that it's got to be a joke. Naples National Archaeological Museum, the Secret Cabinet.
story with the photos. I would recommend you to, after you have finished reading, click on the first picture (feel free to aim for the penis. He won't mind). The photo will then be lifted out of its context. From there you flip through all the photos, one by one, in the correct order and you will find that they give you a kind of story.

The first idea of creating an X-rated blog entry came up when I, Ake, walked through Naples National Archaeological Museum and noticed that most of the statues were nude. I took photos of each one of them thinking that I maybe could create something funny using them. In one hall of the museum they had an special exhibition of erotic art which has been unearthed in excavations in Pompeii and at other sites in Italy. When I later visited Pompeii I found more erotic art. I then decided to take all these photos and make a blog using them.

I can't claim that I know anything about erotic art so please don't give me a hard time if I have gotten things wrong.

As far as I
More normal size More normal size More normal size

OK, no need to worry apparently. They didn't have unusually large penises in Ancient Rome. There is a large number of statues in Naples National Archaeological Museum that are more or less nude.
understand most of the naked statues you can see in this blog were in the Ancient Rome not considered erotic. It is not entirely uncommon that modern statues are completely nude as well and that is not thought of as being pornographic.

In Pompeii I found erotic frescoes in two locations. One was in the Suburban Baths and the other was in a brothel.

The purpose of having erotic art in a public bath is from what I understand not entirely clear. It has been suggested that the reason could be to help people locate which locker they had their clothes in in the locker room. Instead of giving the lockers numbers they were identified with sexually explicit frescoes.

It does make more sense to have pornography in a brothel. The frescoes could serve as a display of merchandise or like a menu over the activities that were on offer. Or maybe they were only there to make the customers mentally and physically ready for action.

When I was looking at the frescoes in the brothel a group entered together with their guide. One woman in the group, she was probably around
Totally shameless statueTotally shameless statueTotally shameless statue

Totally shameless he stands there playing one instrument and flashing another "instrument" for anyone to see. Another in the same museum.
70 years old, came in and had a look around. Then she looked up and saw frescoes showing people engaged in various sexual activities. She giggled twice, looked around to make sure nobody was watching her and then she quickly took a photo of each one of them and stepped out.

Additional photos below
Photos: 42, Displayed: 24


Is  that a leg?Is  that a leg?
Is that a leg?

The little guy in the middle? Is that his leg he is holding in a funny angle? Oups... No it isn't... and the other three are just as naughty... Naples National Archaeological Museum, the Secret Cabinet.
Well the statues don't make me blush at leastWell the statues don't make me blush at least
Well the statues don't make me blush at least

As I said, there were plenty of nude statues in the NNAM. They are nude but at least their "junk" is proportional in size
He is showing off a bit, isn't he?He is showing off a bit, isn't he?
He is showing off a bit, isn't he?

Now the statues in NNAM too start to make me uncomfortable. He is showing off a bit. "Hey, look at my muscles and my penis"
Wow, I see that...Wow, I see that...
Wow, I see that...

"Oh please, not in public. I am glad for you two but I don't really wish to see that you are that "happy to see her". Check in at a hotel both of you. Please". This statue was in the Secret Cabinet of NNAM
That's crudeThat's crude
That's crude

Already in ancient Rome they made those. 2,000 years later they look the same. Boys will be boys, and dicks will be dicks. This is on display in the Secret Cabinet in NNAM.

Another phallus in the Secret Cabinet in NNAM. Just as silly then as they are now.
Nude in a frescoNude in a fresco
Nude in a fresco

A nude man in a fresco in Pompeii. That doesn't look so naughty. Still I find it odd that he is naked. It makes no sense. But I am no art critic or historian so who am I to judge
I am starting to get used to this nowI am starting to get used to this now
I am starting to get used to this now

OK, another nude statue. Many of those around
Those figurines are naughtyThose figurines are naughty
Those figurines are naughty

Naughty figurines in the Secret Cabinet in NNAM.
More naughty figurinesMore naughty figurines
More naughty figurines

...and increasingly naughtier the figurines become the deeper I go into the Secret Cabinet in NNAM
Fresco in a brothel in PompeiiFresco in a brothel in Pompeii
Fresco in a brothel in Pompeii

It looks like they might be having sex but I am not sure. It's almost like in the movies when they dim the light so much that you can't see what they are doing. All you see is some blurry movements which you are supposed to interpret as an intercourse
Fresco in a brothel in PompeiiFresco in a brothel in Pompeii
Fresco in a brothel in Pompeii

Same thing here. You can sort of see what they are doing but still not.
Fresco in suburban baths in PompeiiFresco in suburban baths in Pompeii
Fresco in suburban baths in Pompeii

Now there is no longer any doubt about what is happening. That's cunnilingus
Oh dear...Oh dear...
Oh dear...

Oh my goodness. And they have that on a display in a public museum and everything. Albeit hidden away in the Secret Chamber. But still you don't really expect to find THAT in a museum with such a dull name as Naples National Archaeological Museum.
Let's return to the statuesLet's return to the statues
Let's return to the statues

Let us cool off for a while and have a look at some statues. Statue: "Cheers" Me: "Yep, cheers to you too"
Showing off what he's gotShowing off what he's got
Showing off what he's got

This statue is really thrusting his pelvis forward to show what he's got
The toga... You could shield yourself...The toga... You could shield yourself...
The toga... You could shield yourself...

You could wrap that toga around your waist you know

10th July 2017

The Romans sure knew how to party ;-)
Pompeii have long been on my bucket list and when I go there I expect I will visit Naples away and this just made my list of places to visit. ^_^
10th July 2017

Oh my !!! I saw some of these when were toured Pompeii but obviously, we missed some LOL
12th July 2017

Art for Art's sake
Wasn't Pompeii really really hot? Wasn't that the place consumed by a volcanic eruption? Surely that explains why they didn't wear clothes...must have been really, really, really hot!!!
12th July 2017

Yes, of course
Of course, why didn't I think of that. The heat from Vesuvius kept the city so warm clothes weren't necessary. So simple :-) /Ake

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