The greatest thing about Kuala Lumpur is you can get a McDonald's meal between 12-3pm everyday for $1 - only joking! This is home to the Petronas Towers; only recently it was crowned the largest twin tower structure in the world - something I would keep quiet eh. The towers were also used for the climactic heist scenes in the romantic crime thriller Entrapment starring Sean Connery and Catherine Zeta Jones. Unfortunately its not quite as glamorous in real life and houses petroleum based companies and archives, bah. I must talk about the traffic here, its crazed, if there is a line in the road they will cross it, pavements are fair game and the horn is something that is not used cautiously. Someone will beep to let you know they exist then everyone else will ... read more

The straits of Johor which seperates Singapore from Peninsula Malaysia is only a kilometre across but the difference between the two countries is vast. Gone are the western comforts, such as the English language and toilet paper. Having successfully navigated through the border crossing into Malaysia and into Johor Bahru (according to my Visa my reason for visiting is 'Official Mission' - this was never questioned), we were then supposed to get on the same bus to Larkin Sentral where we could get another bus the 244km to Melaka but here is where it all started to go wrong. We went the wrong way out of the terminal and weren't allowed back through due to inconvenient one way border control rules. So this landed us in the middle Johor Bahru - a state capital the Lonely ... read more

“Not all those who wander are lost.” - J. R. R. Tolkien So it begins, the beast approaches, savouring the meal to come... The apprehension receeds as having read several guidebooks on how to approach this journey i have absorbed some top tips, such as 1) always remember when travelling by bus to sit in the middle seats of the vehicle as you are less likely to die if there is an accident. Brilliant. 2) Beware of scammers! - yes sir, "i usually like to be kissed before i get fucked" 3) Always carry Imodium, i heed this warning well and 4) Beer is cheaper than water - nothing exceeds like excess! Keep an eye on these rantings as a possible side effect of the malaria medication is psychosis - i look forward to it. So ... read more