Getting tangy with Orangutans!

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Hi there donkeys!!

i say donkeys cause it's been DONKEYS since i last scribbled this blog...my bad...i blame the turtles - all fell apart when the 'turtles' came to town! For those of you not in the know I'm referring to the surprise visit from Juuuuuuuuuuules, Rat, Cheese, Ass and Bretmobile! A good bunch of crazies...and what crazy times we had! I'm under strict instructions from Slime to keep this short as so much has happened that all your eyeballs are sure to tumble out should i go into detail-overload on every adventure! So...here goes nothing!

Starting with the last few days of the turtle visit - i managed a wee update from Ko Lanta but much happened after that! Firstly the swamp foot was RIFE! SEveral days sweeeming and many a shneaky shnorkel meant just about everyone had hacked open their foot on a crafty deep sea rock...each day we managed to pack each cut full of sand till it swelled to super size! Anyhoot i won't continue -i just needed the 'swamp foot' theme to get me onto the topic of slime and his swamp pee... we all know how Slime loves to pee in random places but who knew he'd stumble upon a swamp/100% bog!! Trundling back from the 7/11 he decided he needed to have a sneaky pee - he spotted a green patch aka wallowing swamp paddies and decided that was the perfect spot! Needless to say he stomped straight into the swamp, losing his one slip slop in a pool of sh*t...the next day we noticed that there was a toilet right next to Slimey's swamp...what a mutt! Anyhoo after Ko Lanta we headed for Krabi, on to Ao Nang and finally Yao Noi (i think - it's been a while) where we hired SEA KAYAKS!! We loaded them up with beer and other random supplies and took to the high seas! Shucks -it was the best fun ever... well we all thought so except for Slime! He has quite the 'special' kayaking style - perhaps he perfers to go backwards who knows but he literally didn't move!! No matter how loud we shouted PADDLE - there sat Slime, motionless - yet 'paddling' for his life - in the big blue. I got burnt to a crisp waiting for the mutt so was grumpy by the time we finally struck land!! What an adventure though - we camped on our very own island!! Rat and Brettmobile caught some top notch fish, Juuulie freaked out about the pirates and it was the best fun ever!

And then boo - the turtles went home and Sime and i resumed our travels. We headed for Ko Lipe, spent one night and beetled off to Ko Bulon Leh...WOW - such a lovely place. It was this tiny island and we were pretty much the only peeps there... we would have had the crazy soft sand beaches all to ourselves had it not RAINED the entire 3 days we were there!! What a downer but no bother - we met some lovely folk including Jobe and his fellow goofed rasta companions who owned the Bong Hill Bar - on the last night they even invited us for grub (for free) which was great fun and super tasty. And then it was time to say goodbye Thailand and take our pie to Indo...

From Hat Yai we took a bus to Penang (George Town) in Malaysia where we had prepared to stay one night and then board a 1x ferry to Sumatra...what a good thing we bumped in to the super crazy friendly dude at our guesthouse. Word on the street says that the Indonesian folk generally don't dig it if you overstay your welcome - they quite like to lock you up in fact and seeing that Slime and i weren't that amped for jail we decided to get a 60 day visa instead of chancing our arm - they give you 30 on arrival...we needed 37. So to cut a long story short we stayed an extra 2 days in Penang - we both got our visas and i turned 27!! i had a top notch birthday...started with a trip to the indo consulate, then to the giant shopping centre where we bought Jobe - the new fine bovine i popped out - then onto the CHOCOLATE BOUTIQUE and finally birthday grub at Kapitan in Little India where we guzzled the best Rogan Josh + Tikka Masala that our ringits could buy...it was AWESOME! We ended the eve wading home - shin deep in torrential rain, played some cards, drank horrid cheap vodka, did a birthday dans and went to sleep happy😊

Hungover we boarded our ferry and took to the high seas...it was on this fine ferry where we met 2 fun Bavarians (from Germany) and have travelled with them ever since! Martin and Maren - truly excellent fun! Together we have trekked jungles and mounted volcanos (hmmm not sure that mounted is the right word but ho hum!) We arrived in Sumatra and headed for Bukit Lawang - crazy jungle spot filled with many a tangy orangutang. Shucks we had such fun - definitely one of my favourite places so far. We stayed in the Garden Inn and made many a friend with all the chaps working there - they were all super friendly and love to practice their English - so many a fat chat, chuckle and Bintang were consumed! I then strapped on my jungle boots and headed off in search of some Tang! It was just me, Slime, Martin, Maren, Silom (random French dude) and our bat shit crazy guide Leng...plus of course many a jungle critter! We were actually really lucky the 2 days we were living in the jungle - the first day we saw many an Orangutan - all really really close and just so tangy - we also saw Thomas Leaf Tree monkeys (killer name - they have a fine face and a super long tail), giant hornbills, tortoises, more Tang and when we arrived at camp we discovered a giant monitor lizard had already set up his tent! Not really - he just fancied hanging about our camp! AFter a fine jungle nap we were ready for day 2...well almost! The trekking itself was pretty wild - especially when you're packing some top notch jungle sneaks (converse rip offs from Next with zero grip) like myself! Damn i fell on my face many a time - crazy slippery steep climbs followed by death-defying decents all while keeping an eye out for sneaky snakes and crafty caterpillars - Sime's favourites of which we saw many! PLus i had the assistant giude behind me chanting 'Hati Hati' (be careful) and plan plan (slowly) the WHOLE time - he drove me NUTS - never quite understood that no matter how many times he reapeted Hati Hati (all day) I would still see my naught! Good times! - Day 2 also brought with it the fight of the gibbons! So many hairy canaries - we were literally attacked by 3 black gibbons - had to beat them off with sticks and everything! Nothing like a wild swinging gibbon coming straight for your face - good times though! We ended our 2 day jungle adventure rafting home on tubes - things got pretty crazy as the river was super fast after all the rain...jolly good fun though - i did manage to kick Martin in the head (by accident) during a particulary hairy rapid - luckily he didn't kick me back - he is Bavarian after all!! All in all it was excellent fun - our best trek yet - and we trundled back to our guest house for a well deserved cold shower!!

We intended to leave the next day but en route to the bus stop we bumped into a whole school of students who were keen to chat! Next thing we knew we were having our photo taken 5 meelion times, stating our name, country and hobbies, singing, dancing - we even had to make a speech at the end to all the students plus headmaster offering advice to them all!! MADNESS! all this madness meant we missed our bus and had to stay another night but who cares - it was such a special moment and to be honest none of us wanted to leave Bukit Lawang anyway!

The next day we made it to the bus stop (i had Sime keeping a sneaky eye out for any sneaky student who might delay us!) and beetled off to Beristagi which is where i sit now - Sime is going nuts cause this is taking me so long!! Oh dear - i'll wrap up! Beristagi is nothing special...except for it's awesome VOLCANO which we climbed up yesterday!! It really was amazing! I have weirdly developed a fond fetish for pineapple - this meant i looked like a serious mountaineer... Hank under one arm, a giant pineapple under the other plus my 'volcano boots' from Next!! Born to trek as the Bavarians say!! It was quite spectacular on the top - even more so when i carved up the giant pineapple! The trek down was pretty hairy (i saw my naught 3 times - gooooood shoes) but we eased our aching muscles in the hot (boiling) springs at the bottom. Another top notch day in Indo😊 Today it has been rainy and grim so hence i'm scribbling the blog - we hae also booked our flights to Bali with the Bavarians - don't think we'll stay in Bali - probably head to the Gilli islands or Flores but who knows - we can't decide anything without flipping a coin! Seriously - Sime couldn't even decide between guacomole (spelling?!) toast or pancakes for breakfast...he didn't like the coin outcome so got both! Tomorrow we're off to Lake Tobah - biggest volcanic lake in south east ASia - amped!!

I'm starting to get sad that we nearing the end of this mad adventure but am also excited to see everyone back home... monster thanks to everyone for all the birthday wishes by the way - such champs! But now i must be off - Sime will be wanting his Tang (Bintang) and i gotta go work on my German with the Bavarians. If you want to give us a tinkle our new number is 081 362 093391 -plus the crafty code (think it's +62 but could be wrong!)

Miss you all beastly
Lots of love eM, Slime, Gary, Hank, Funcan, Jobe and the fun Bavarians!

p.s. cold showers in Beristagi are quite special - we're high in the mountains which means it's actually COLD making the shower super COLD and all that more awesome x

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