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Published: April 10th 2008
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The Legend of the Mermanimal
Fighting crowds of shouting Chinese tourists to get one picture in and reminding me of the reason I left China I’m not quite sure what I was expecting when I arrived in Singapore. After all of the tales I had heard about the stringent Singaporean laws back home I almost pictured a country where you could eat off of the streets and a society whose people reflected the image of perfection. However, this image was completely altered when I arrived there in the early am after taking a night bus in from Kuala Lumpur. I was dropped off somewhere north of the city center in a dingy neighborhood that looked more along the lines of the KL Chinatown.
Instead of streets made of gold and trees that grew crisp Singaporean notes I was greeted by a long legged prostitute, who was fooling no one of the fact that she was in fact a man, and a hoard of drunken men that were filling up on early morning dim sum after a hard night out on the town. I couldn’t believe it. What about all of those strange laws that I had heard about back in the west. Were they all wives tales?
The men blatantly cleared there throats and spit onto the ground regardless of the supposed $1000 fine
for this offense. The streets were scattered in trash despite the law that if you litter three times you have to clean the streets with a bib on saying “I’m a litter lout”. A number of prostitutes, including the one who was clearly a man, wandered the early morning streets flashing their wares even though homosexuals are not allowed to live in the country and pornography is strictly illegal. And I won’t even mention the state of the toilets regardless of the fact that they have a special police force to make sure that people have flushed properly and if not you are issued with a hefty fine. How could this be possible in this strict city-state that rules with an iron fist of laws for even the most minor of offenses. It must have become more lenient over the years because the Singapore that I had imagined was not the one that I experienced.
After a strange couple of hours wandering around this northern district of Singapore in search of a toilet with toilet paper, avoiding the pros and awaiting the local bus service to start up I arrived in downtown Singapore. Within 10 minutes of riding the
Singaporean Sunrise
a sunrise to remember over the city of gold bus I seemingly entered a different country, the Singapore of my imagination. I got off the bus near the famous Raffles Hotel and for lack of anything else to do, I wandered the picture perfect city streets towards the coast so that I could take in the sunrise over the city.
It was an amazing start to the day and one of the best sunrises that I’ve seen in a long time. However, after the sun rose I was soon reminded of the fact that I was a filthy bastard. After a week and a half of traveling through humid Malaysia and biking up hills in the Cameron Highlands that would put tears in Lance Armstrong’s eyes I didn’t exactly smell that fresh. And now I was surrounded by a city without a scrap of trash on the ground and crowds of people dressed up in pimp suits and leaving a trail of their expensive perfumes or colognes in their wake. I don’t even want to imagine the scent that I was leaving behind but it couldn’t have been that nice.
All of a sudden I felt very out of place. I don’t like this about cities.
Fancy Stairs
the city was painted in colors All they make you want to do is go out and spend your money on the latest trends so you don’t look different from the likes of Mr. and Mrs. Fresh walking down the street next to you. It’s lame and this was mainly my image of Singapore. It made me want to go to the malls and spend a stupid amount of money on a decent t-shirt and some pants so that I didn’t feel out of place. Luckily, I came to my senses and didn’t do anything of the sort. However, this was my main image of Singapore. A lot of obscenely well off bankers and business men whose only concern was money and looking good. It is a beautiful city and I had a good time walking around, eating good food and talking pictures but it wasn’t for me. I wanted to be back up in Malaysia drinking tea at a shitty dim sum restaurant with some local character and sharing a laugh. I didn’t want to be sitting at a fancy bar sipping a Singapore sling with some fancy foreign bankers talking about finance and futures. It’s just not my idea of fun.
So after
Incense Coils
old chinese temple competeing for space amongst the massive skyscrapers in downtown Singapore a spending a fun filled day from 5am-6pm in Singapore I took the next bus back to Malaysia, where I could wear my grungy army pants and three day old t-shirt with pride.
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charles mcgrath
non-member comment
nice blog. I want to go to singapore, you have to let me know where to go. The other one had some wicked pics to but I can only be bothered to write one comment.