The heart, The soul, The Death...

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I left relatively clean Calcutta for fascinating Varanasi on my first A/C train... When i boarded & found my seat i was very pleasantly surprised to find a pillow, towel, blanket and 2 sheets folded on my bed! So surprised infact that i text Sebastian, a friend i met in the Ashram who is always trying to convince me to go A/C Class.. He replied with "Pillows are old news" haha! Its alright for some. Sleeper class might be slumming it but the price difference in vast... it cost me 400r (5pounds) to get from Chennai to Calcutta a 16hr journey and this 12hr journey to Varanasi in A/C is costing me 1500 (20pounds) It was worth it though as the train was 3hr late, so 15hr, with the weather a boiling 45+ I almost kissed the A/C unit!

I'd called ahead a book a room at Shanti guest house, Seb and Emily had both stayed there and i was ready for a rooftop restaurant with fellow travelers.
The room was decent and only 200r so i showered and set off on a venture to find a friend to explore this extraordinary city with.
A few cups of Chai and a short conversation later, Nick, Will and I set off into the lanes to get lost and maybe find something we're missing.
Our guest house was just a few maze like lanes from the main burning Ghat so we ended up there... The power of a place can overwhelm every sense.
For those of you who have never heard of Varanasi its a holy place in India where people pilgrimage and wish to die, it is thought that if you die in Varanasi you break the circle of life a go to Paradise. The main burning Ghat is a huge open air crimitroiam, the family brings the body, washes it in the Ganges, then the body is rapped in white clothe, put on a pile of wood and fire is sourced from the fire a Shiva which has been burning for over 3000years the body is then burnt, to purify the soul, before being thrown in the river, while i was there and this was being explained to me by a Braman, 5 body's were at different stages, the boys were busy asking questions and chatting away, while i was stunned into silence. I think i've come to relised this year in India just how emotionally sensitive i am, i was over taken by love, fear and death, i didn't want to watch but my body was stuck fascinated... As i stared into the void i listen as the Brahman explained, 4 kinds of people are not burnt... Brahman, Children, Pregnant woman and anyone bitten by a snake, i'm not sure about the latter but the rest is because they are thought to already be pure there-fore not needed to be purified by the fire. They are taken out on a boat tied to something heavy and sunk, as the man explained that most become untied and float to the top, mostly hitting the other shore then being eatten by birds and dogs, i felt my body stir. A quick bow at the great fire then time to leave... I wasn't sure why i felt so sick but the mix of emotions was overwhelming me, i had to escape...

I wandered then without intent along with the boys, Will had only been in India for a week so was still caught chatting to everyone, we were lead to temples and 'come look my' shops, i walked along, almost aimlessly... It wasn't until 6pm that night as i sat in a river boat watching the Ariti that i felt my body shake back to life, sliently in the peace of meditation, the sick feeling left and Saskia creapt back in.

I stayed awake all that night, lightened with the buzz of the city, the ever burning fire and the conversations with a range of interesting people. At 5.30am i took a sunrise boat on the river to watch the city wake up. Strange i thought that at 5.30am the river was packed by woman, children and men washing themselves, drinking and swimming in the river of death

Saskia

Shanti xxx

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