John R Kelly

Manic Tramper

John R Kelly

After a near-death experience, I now look at life much differently and, as a result, I'm taking a drastic turn! This next year I am leaving the security of a job to go on a spiritual journey. I will start by tramping Europe all over from the Alps in France all the way to the northern parts of Norway. After that, maybe I'll bike the country or become an Alaskan fisherman or something. I want to share my story along the way...

Two years ago, I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. As a naval officer who has been in the Navy for almost eight successful years, this was a devastating reality as that spelled the end of a career I thoroughly enjoyed. After fighting to stay in and allowing the stress to take over my life in ways I would never imagine, I finally succumbed to a medical retirement. This is no longer a negative outcome, however. One of the most peaceful realizations is that life is about experiencing the things around you and loving the people that become a part of your life and not about careers and a house and possessions. I look forward to sharing with you my past struggles and future adventures in hopes to reveal that this “disease” does not have to be a stigma, but a virtue instead.

Abandoning My Comfort Zone (Ranting on Uncertainty)

North America » United States » Washington » Marysville August 16th 2011

Manic Tramper

So when I felt a calling to just go out on a limb and take the journey I am about to enter, there were a lot of fears. After all, at that time, I was preparing myself for the next step on the job market through a recruiting firm that works specifically with military officers. My career marketing skills were being sharpened so that I would leave the Navy and make a smooth transition into the corporate world. As a matter of fact, at this moment, I would be at a career conference in North Carolina. I was also flirting with the idea of teaching and coaching and at one point before then, considering law school (indecisiveness has always a weakness for me!) Heck, even now, I sometimes it is tempting to just abandon my tramping ... read more

Choose Joy... Even when it's really, really, really difficult!

North America » United States » Washington » Marysville August 14th 2011

Manic Tramper

Parenting is fun, but sometimes co-parenting with an ex isn't so much. So my fun-filled summer with my two kids, Jordan and Taylor, is now over. Getting out of my comfort zone and playing single-dad made for one of my most memorable experiences. Erin came back to claim them, so I said my goodbyes and let them be so that they could start their new year at school and walked back into my suddenly quiet house. But before they left Washington, Erin called me with a question about a toy and turned it into a release of hatred she has built up in herself for me. Needless to say, if her objective was to "make me" feel lousy, it worked. At first, I limped away feeling like an inadequate father. On top of that, this happened ... read more

Friends

North America » United States August 3rd 2011

High School Friends

Manic Tramper

If there is one thing I have learned from my experiences, it is that we all need friends. They are there to give us advice when a big decision comes up. They help us see things that we cannot from our perspective. And they are there when we are at our lowest point. Unfortunately, if there is one thing I am good at, it is not trusting and being open to those who call me friend, especially when I need them most. There are so many areas in my life where the shoulder of a friend was needed yet I ignored it for some other reason. Instead of friendship, I allowed rage as a teenager to inspire me to run away across the country instead of down the road to open hearts. Instead of friendship, I ... read more

Bi-Winning

North America » United States » Texas July 8th 2011

Living the Moment

Manic Tramper

Life isn't about how good or bad our circumstances are - it's about how we dealt with the challenges that came our way. No one remembers someone who had an easy life. We, instead, relish stories of courageous individuals who overcame hardships when everything was stacked against them. Some unfortunate circumstances may take a while to navigate through and may see moments where there just seems to be no end, but that just adds patience to those who come through. The past two and a half years have been some of the most difficult of my life. Some people may say that I brought it on myself, and I agree that there are consequences for our actions. But that still does not mean it was not tough. Losing my family, the trust of loved ones and ... read more

Let's Try Again

North America » United States » Washington June 21st 2011

Think I'm gonna climb that!

Manic Tramper

It was the first day of summer. The golden sun was radiating over the gorgeous landscape of western Washington with not a cloud in the sky. The air was warm and pure and beckoned everyone to be outside. And the frustration of last Friday's failed hike was still haunting me as I looked east to the mountains. Driving back from a morning work assignment, I decided that I would play hooky, enjoy the perfect day and shake off this annoyance once and for all. As I stated before, there were many lessons learned from the previous hike and I was going to adhere to it all. I bought bug repellant while at Wal Mart and grabbed plastic bags for anything electronic, including my new camera I purchased for my year of tramping that waited for me ... read more

Small mountain stream high up in the ridge

A Dangerous Way to Learn a Few Lessons

North America » United States » Washington June 20th 2011

Manic Tramper

So as I do with running or biking, I am now in training for my long-distance hikes. It's a chance to carry my pack through rough terrain, embrace overnights outside in the fresh air, and learn lessons that will carry me to safety in my future endeavors. I went for an "overnight" hike on Friday and did I learn plenty of lessons to take with me. It was a major failure that only lasted a few hours because I put myself in unnecessary danger. A snow-fed rushing river changed my hike for the worst, and had I not been a bit lucky, it could have even claimed my life. After about a mile down a challenging trail at Mt. Baker-Snoqualmie National Forest, I heard the rushing waters of the river that would later claim me. At ... read more

On Being a Father from Afar

North America » United States » Texas June 19th 2011

My kiddos and I

Manic Tramper

Being a father is one of the biggest blessings any man will be able to experience. I have never had more butterflies in my stomach than the day I watched my son, Jordan, be born. And carrying my little girl the second I came home from deployment sent chills through my spine. Every time I see them, whether it is on Skype or at the airport when I fly to see them, I grin from ear-to-ear. Those little ones mean the world to me and ignite feelings I never knew I had. Now being far from them sometimes makes me sad. Sure, it's a shame that my marriage was unhappy and not meant to be, but that does not change the fact that I am their father. In fact, despite that circumstance, I am confident that ... read more

Matt & John on San Juan

North America » United States » Washington » Friday Harbor June 13th 2011

My Bike

Manic Tramper

Do you know that ridiculous hypothetical question where someone asks you if you were stranded on an island, what would you want to take with you? If it were San Juan Island, I would definitely say my bike! And after stepping out of my house early Saturday morning to see that it would be a bright sunny day, the decision was final and my destination was the island. My friend, Matt, decided to join me on the adventure. He had some time off and wanted to do something different for him, so I asked him to come along. We threw our bikes into the back of my pickup and headed north. It was a little chilly that morning, but after looking at the forecast and thinking about the physical output we would be giving, I decided ... read more

Rantings - 6/8/2011

North America » United States » Washington » Marysville June 8th 2011

Manic Tramper

So I know what some might think reading my very first blog on TB ever: "Why would he tell everyone such a personal and potentially embarrasing story?" Some of you think I may want you to feel sorry for me. Others may feel I am just begging for attention. In my world, those motives get you nowhere. As I stated in a previous blog, last spring a Navy psychiatrist finally diagnosed me with Bipolar I Disorder. There are quite a number of misconceptions about this so-called "impairment" so I want to share more about it. First, BPD is a mood disorder and is far different than a personality disorder. A mood disorder deals with disturbances in someone's mood no matter what kind of person they are. In the case of BPD, the moods cycle over time ... read more

The Leap, Part I Cont'd

North America » United States » Washington » Mukilteo June 7th 2011

Manic Tramper

Five minutes had gone by in the frigid waters as I watched the bright lights of the ferry began to dim in the distance and the roar of the propellers died down to a whisper. My mind was at first calm at the thought of saying goodbye to this world that had tormented me at times. But there is a funny thing about staring death in the face. Thoughts of a wonderful life begin to wonder through the mind. At least that is what happened in mine. The first thing that flashed in my eyes that starry night were my beautiful children calling out to me. How could I just run away on them? And then family and friends who never knew anything was wrong. Was it fair that I never said anything about something that ... read more

Joined	May 23rd 2011	Trips	1
Last Login	August 17th 2011	Followers	0
Status	BLOGGER	Follows	0
Blogs	11	Guestbook	6
Photos	47	Forum Posts	0