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Published: December 8th 2006
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Ban Kruit Hostel
Very nice, I like... Hey everyone, I'm currently on the island of Ko Pha-Ngan, which is quite the party place, kinda like Ibiza or Mallorca. We checked out the Full Moon party last night, more on that on my next blog. Let's just say it's been a long night, so I won't be doing much today.
Since I've got some time to kill, I thought I'd share a couple funny stories during our time in Ban Kruit last week (well, funny to me, anyway). Ban Kruit is a quiet but beautiful place. Great beaches and clear water. There are almost no tourists here, so you get the opportunity to see the real Thailand, meaning you can see the way people here really live their lives.
Anyway, we were here for a week, and one day I decided to ditch Rob at the beach and rent a bicycle. I figured I'd check out a few of the sights near our hostel, then go into town, pick up some supplies, use the internet, and head back to the hostel. Simple enough, right?
Wrong. First off, the bike I rented was a complete piece of shit! Sadly, it was the best of a bad lot,
P.O.S. Bike
I HATE YOU!!! I HATE YOU!!! I HATE YOU!!! as it seemed to be the only bike that could even slow down enough for me to jump off to stop. It made a wierd winding noise when you pedalled and even though it had numerous gears, only one worked. Oh well, what'cha gonna do?
My first stop was going to be at a nearby cave that held several Buddist statues. Now while I did have a map with me, I'm not exactly a master of direction. So needless to say, I took a wrong turn and started going by some countryside houses. Passing by a few houses by bicycle isn't normally a big deal, but apparently it is to the dogs living in the area - I passed three houses, and I had three different dogs chasing me! The first time I thought it was bad luck, the second I could chalk up to random chance, but three times? That's a fucking trend! And because I was going in the wrong direction, I had to turn back and do it all over again. Hooray! May as well tie a chunk roast to the back of the bike and cover myself in gravy while I'm at it!
Anyway,
Rob & Lucky
The hostel's dog and moocher of food. I got past the dogs unscathed and made it to the cave, but forgot to bring a change of clothes with me (you are supposed to wear pants and a shirt at least up to the elbows when you enter a buddhist temple in Thailand). All that BS with the dogs for nothing?! SHIT! So I decided to forego the temples for another day and head off to town.
Going into town worked out OK. I found the internet cafe rather easily and finished everything I wanted to do. Great, the day's finally turning around for me, right?
Wrong. When I went up to pay, the guy at the counter informed me that my bike had a flat tire. SHIT!! Now what? Thankfully, the guy also told me that there was a bike repair shop nearby - Hallelujah! I didn't want to stick around to see what else could go wrong that day, so once I got the bike fixed I booked it to the hostel as fast as I could pedal that piece of crap! Sadly, that wasn't very fast - small children drove past on mopeds and laughed!
So the next day, I decided to stick
Temple on the Hill
I wish I had a name for you, but the map wasn't particularly descriptive. around on the beach until late afternoon, then walk to a nearby temple on a hill. That's right, walk. No more shitty bicycles for me, baby! The temple was pretty cool, even though I couldn't go in it since it closed at 3:30. the architecture was a lot different then anything I've seen on this trip, and there was a giant sitting Buddha there too. The walk back was also rather trippy because it really reinforced just how friendly Thai people are: smiling, waving, shouting hello - hell, a couple of guys even offered me a ride back on their scooter!
When I got back to the hostel, Rob was chatting with a nice Austrian girl named Sonya. We all hit it off and went into town for supper, and that was pretty good - at least up until Rob and Sonya discovered the swarm of ants on their seat! One minute they're enjoying their food, the next minute they're jumping off the bench with that, "Oh shit!" expression on their faces! Awesome! I laughed so hard I nearly choked on my fish! And my side was ant-free, which made it even funnier!
Ahh, Sonya and Rob get
Monk Statue
Just a really cool statue by the temple. the ants on their bench, and I get away scott free! Things are finally going my way, right?
WRONG. Unfortunately, I received penance later that evening when the three of us went for a late night swim in the ocean. It was a beautiful night, the water was warm and I had a cold beer in my hand.
So I'm sitting in the water near the shore so I could enjoy the ocean and my beer at the same time, when I felt a burning sensation on my arm. I didn't think too much of it, but then Sonya felt one too. Then I got another one, much more noticable, on my ribs. I stood up and found some gooey thing on my swimtrunks. WTF? I brushed it off, and felt another sting! Jellyfish! SHIT!!! Well Sonya and I rushed out of there, and Rob, who caught on a lot quicker, was already out of the water, choosing to use me as, "a human shield." Fucker. Don't think you won't pay Rob! You'll pay; ohhhh, you'll pay!!!
To summarize the rest of the week, Rob and I rented a scooter and rode brokeback-mountain style to the cave, the
temple, and a waterfall, but in a totally not gay way. Sure we had Village People style bike helmets on, but it was totally not gay! And yeah, we were singing that, "The only one for me is you/ and you for me/ so happy together" song, but it was
totally not gay!!! It was really manly, like chicken wings and beer!
Totally not gay!!! Shit, this is a long blog. Enough of this - later people!
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anyone
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too funny!
This blog had me and my coworkers laughing out loud. I do indeed envy you and that beach. Have fun and keep the tales of all that's not gay coming.