We're okay, we hope you's are too (gag)

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HEYYYYY WE'RE BACKKKKKK!!!!!! So, we havent been on in ages we've been busy with so much. Cant even remember the last blog, as far as i know the dinosaurs we're still alive....well nearly. We're over here 4 and a half months now, it honestly feels more like 4 and half years, my forehead has gone crinkly like a prune with stress and the hard sun. Ah just kiddin im still gawgus. So is Rae. okay so i just pressed Ctrl and list blogs and got another page up which ye can do and seen the last blog we actually did was 30th of march. Shit!! Where to start?

Okay here we start with the news and goss. My OLD job(left those sum' bitches...as they say in black american films) wanted to send me to the australian desert for 4 weeks on and 1 off, i told them ''yeah yeah i'll do that no bother'', really so they'd keep me on for a few more weeks till i got my sparky licence. I was actually gona go when it was 2 on 1 off but a month was ridiculous so i played along for a few weeks. Coz we were livin in the mangy hostel with the drunks and drug addicts( yeah ma, we're left now so i can finally tell you how dangerous it really was) we had to get Rachel a place to stay when i went away...queue the apartment hunt. We were checkin the ads on the net for places and seeing some great places for real cheap,over lookin the perth skyline and all sorts of fancy jazz. Now as you all might know i can be a little green, so its just aswel Rae is here to spot the scams and keep me wide. Enter Carmen E Mendez. ''hello my name is james lanigan and im interested in your apartment for my self and girlfriend, blah blah blah get back to me about viewing and stuff''. Email back off her, ''Thanks so much for your response,Am happy that you are interested in renting out my apartment,My apartment is well furnished and well decorated with a lot of facility such as:Wireless internet facilities, Phone, Microwave, Dish washer, washing machine, Dryer, Refrigerator, Bathroom, Toilet, Bedroom, kitchen, utility room and the bills is included in the rent amount and also you will be using all this facility alone without sharing with any body,am presently in USA now to complete my work with UNICEF and am here with my family and my key is deposited at the DHL office in Perth international Airport, so that any interested tenant can pickup the key there.Please I want you to note that,I am a kind and honest woman and also I spent a lot on my property that I want to give you for rent,so I will solicit for your absolute maintenance of this apartment and want you to treat it as your own,is that taken?It is not the money that is the main problem, but want you to keep it tidy all the time so that I will be glad to see it neat when i came for a check up.I do that once in a while.I also want you to let me have trust in you as i always stand on my word. So I hope you can promise me to take very good care of my apartment.'' In my defence I didnt really read it through before i rang Rachel excited saying stupid stuff i still cringe at now, ''here Rae, our luck could be changin, think we might have this place'', R:''why what she say''. J😞i read out the email). R: ''........(long pause)...ehh James that sounds like a scam, come on home and we'll talk about it''. But this email really sealed it for me, From her,''

Thanks so much for the mail,i will be willing to rent out my apartment to you if only you can promise that you will help me take good care of my apartment in my absence.

For you to get the place reserved we will both sign a rental agreement contract which will be prepared by my lawyer, after your deposit payment which is your first month rent and the security deposit has been confirmed.The key is deposited at the DHL office in Perth international Airport, so if you make the payment, i will send the tracking number to you so that you can pick it up at the DHl office in Perth.

Do get back to me with the below information so that we can proceed further:Your full name:Your full address:Nationality:Passport id:Phone number:Date of birth:Move in date and out: I shall be waiting for the above information soonest. Please make sure you send me your correct current address because i would use that in posting down the keys and the payment receipt to you after we must have concluded the contract. ''.

Shit like that went on for weeks, so many scammers here it would make the nigerians look like saints. In the end we got a place in a quiet suburb called maylands. Its okay, quiet most of the time but a few Abos out during the day hasssling. Swear to god the abos are the worst thing about Oz and something you never here about. Last week 4 dirty scumbag aboriginals hit a german backpacker for not givin them a ciggerette which he hadnt even got. The german fella fell, hit his head on a curb and is now in a coma. Heard on the news a teen was arrested but that will be it, he'll quietly be re-released. They're treated like a sacred being but yous will all see them when you's come over and visit hopefully. So yeah moved into the house. Bit sad leaving the hostel really, it was home for 3 months and change is hard. Our room was home, had our telly and fridge and kept to ourselves but fair is fair, 3 months in a hostel is too much for a girl and not really fair. Any fella will tell you that they'd sleep in dirt coz we would but you cant expect girls to do for that long so well done Rachel is was hard. We live with 2 couples, the couple who own it are Gonzalo the Columbian and Lucy the korean

Just had the blog done, Rachel comes over to me( yeah im blaming her) and asks me to print off taxback pages for her friend and i accidentally close the whole blog. Couldnt be more sick, its been 4 weeks since i started this paragraph and finished the last one. So you's are gettin a rushed one now. Work is good, life is good, money is okay( just abit under good), we're great(just abit above good). Goodbye. So, went to Swan Valley a few weeks ago, wine tasting and chocolate tasting and what not. Wedidnt really do the wine tasting coz we were dressed like nackers and driving the monster mobile, ladders and plastic conduits hanging offf the sides. We did do the free chocolate tasting, yes i said free. Tonight, We are mean, so lets set the world on fire.....and so on.

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Photos

Company Car
Its called a ute,as in utility vehical,i think. Anyway,smell of shame ha

Be Quiet!!
The infamous note which ruined us and THEM. Im not that loud in the morning

A Twinkie
You see them in american movies...i just had to have one. Delicios, as Dora would say

Us in bed
Just incase you forget how really really, really goodlooking we are. (blue steel).

Our wardrobe.
A little thing like wardrobe space goes a long way with us simple folk

Crazy Hair
How original...Not