Southern Fried

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Well we survived the washing experience aided by a very nice Tennessee woman who not only showed us how to operate the beasts contained in room 101 but also gave us free detergent. I think she was somewhat fascinated by our accents, and overawed by our tour; but that’s not surprising seeing as she’d only been over the state line once.

Last night we ignored the concierge’s recommendations to go to the Rendezvous but instead headed off to Gus’s Famous Hot & Spicy Fried Chicken Restaurant. Think ultra plump & juicy KFC with attitude and that might give you an idea; fiery and finger licking good for sure. We then headed back to Beale Street for our last night of Memphis blues, beers and whisky.

Late this morning in bright sunshine (albeit bitterly cold) we headed down route 55 to Jackson; and yes we played Johnny Cash several times! A good day for driving quiet wide open highways and amazingly a serious lack of Sunday drivers. Pulled up for some gas, and spotted our first bona fide pick-up truck full of red-necks, sporting a full confederate’s flag, mullets, ample bum cleavage, numerous shotguns and wiry looking mongrels, and we even think there was a banjo pride of place in the passenger seat; we guessed they were on their way to appear on the Jerry Springer show “my ma is also my pa”.

Arrived at the Fairfield Inn late afternoon, bit like a Travel Inn but unfortunately no restaurant or bar facilities, but nevertheless clean and comfortable. Just had a pizza delivered to our room, and it had to be the only pizza I’ve ever had delivered that was actually hot, they sure must have fast scooters around here!

Andy & I started playing a game last night - American fashion sense. Outside of New York everyone has the same quite strange style, so we started christening people and giving them a job according to their outfits. Here’s a few we thought up so far.

Charles Jr - Works for FedEx early 20s looks 40, often seen out with his mom (or on his own), slightly podgy after eating all mum‘s home-baked apple pies: Simon Cowell high waist beige polyester slacks (that finish mid calf), yellow polo shirt, white socks, slip on black shoes with tassels

Tennessee Bomber Buck - Works as a truck driver, with a girl in every town, late 30s, always seen with a girl on his arm: cowboy hat (to cover his thinning mullet) jeans, cowboy boots, checked shirt and Harley leather jacket

Charlene - Works at Family Dollar, late teens looks mid 20s, very short and very plump, often seen out with Arlene looking for Buck: stilettos with no tights (even when it’s freezing cold) short skirt, T shirt with a slogan on it, fake Prada handbag

Chuck - Works at local engineering company, mid 30s, very fat lots of bum cleavage: football/ hockey/ baseball shirt, baseball cap to match shirt, baggy around the knees jeans (not because they’re fashionable that way) trainers, always seen predatorily hunting in packs of 4 or more men.

Chuck’s girlfriend (she doesn’t have a name) take Charlene and substitute T shirt for football/ hockey/ baseball shirt.

Mary-Anne - in her late 30s but looks 50 something, slightly overweight but hides it well. She doesn’t work, her husband does that, but she does a bit of voluntary work for the Christian Store, normally seen congregating in groups of 4-6 similar ladies for breakfast or lunch: Nice flared slacks in brown or red (finish just above the ankle) socks and clogs (perhaps in red to match the trousers) polo neck jumper, and pashmina pinned at the shoulder by a dying swan brooch.

Elizabeth - in her 90s, painfully thin, sips water never to be seen eating or without her close friend and confidante Juliette: fur coat, fur lined ankle boots, fur hat and Chihuahua.

The USA has to be the best place for people watching (if you hadn’t guessed!) If we see some more stereotypes we’ll add them to the blog.

Song for day (as if you couldn‘t guess): Johnny Cash - Jackson

Nina & Andy x0x0

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