The Last Swann of Scotland

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Well, I am back from my trip to Scotland and I really enjoyed it. I visited the city of Stirling, Edinburgh, and a little time in Glasgow. I also spent some time in the smaller towns of St. Andrews and Doune. Some of the highlights include visiting Doune Castle (the castle where they filmed Monty Python and the Holy Grail), walking the Royal Mile, Stirling Castle (the home of many of the Stewart kings of Scotland including Mary Queen of Scots and her son James the future James I of England), Edinburgh Castle, the British Golf Museum, the Old Course of St. Andrews, eating some Haggis with "neeps and tatties," and enjoying a deep fried Mars Bar (a local delicacy). I hope you enjoy the pictures. Thanks

Matt

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Photos

Glasgow
George Square

Willy Wallace Hostel-My Bed
Huh, Jude Law...yep thats me

Church of the Holy Rude
James I of England was baptized here

Mars Wark Stirling
Built around 1569 by the Earl of Mar, it was later destroyed during the 1745-1746 rising. All that is left is the facade

2
That is William Wallace (you know...Braveheart)

Doune Castle in Doune, Scotland
My Monty Python Pilgrimage is complete

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It is I, Arthur, son of Uther Pendragon, from the castle of Camelot. King of the Britons, defeator of the Saxons, sovereign of all England!

3
Pull the other one!

4
I am. And this my trusty servant Patsy.
We have ridden the length and breadth of the land in search of knights
who will join me in my court of Camelot. I must speak with your lord
and master.

5
GUARD #1: What, ridden on a horse?
ARTHUR: Yes!
GUARD #1: You're using coconuts!
ARTHUR: What?
GUARD #1: You've got two empty halves of coconut and you're bangin'
'em together.

6
ARTHUR: So? We have ridden since the snows of winter covered this
land, through the kingdom of Mercea, through--
GUARD #1: Where'd you get the coconut?
ARTHUR: We found them.
GUARD #1: Found them? In Mercea? The coconut's tropical!
ARTHUR: What do you mean?

7
GUARD #1: Well, this is a temperate zone.
ARTHUR: The swallow may fly south with the sun or the house martin
or the plumber may seek warmer climes in winter yet these are not
strangers to our land.
GUARD #1: Are you suggesting coconuts migrate?

8
ARTHUR: Not at all, they could be carried.
GUARD #1: What -- a swallow carrying a coconut?
ARTHUR: It could grip it by the husk!
GUARD #1: It's not a question of where he grips it! It's a simple
question of weight ratios! A five ounce bird could not carry a 1 pound
coconut.

9
ARTHUR: Well, it doesn't matter. Will you go and tell your master
that Arthur from the Court of Camelot is here.
GUARD #1: Listen, in order to maintain air-speed velocity, a swallow
needs to beat its wings 43 times every second, right?
ARTHUR: Please!
GUARD #1: Am I right?

10
ARTHUR: I'm not interested!
GUARD #2: It could be carried by an African swallow!
GUARD #1: Oh, yeah, an African swallow maybe, but not a European
swallow, that's my point.
GUARD #2: Oh, yeah, I agree with that...

11
ARTHUR: Will you ask your master if he wants to join my court
at Camelot?!
GUARD #1: But then of course African swallows are not migratory.
GUARD #2: Oh, yeah...
GUARD #1: So they couldn't bring a coconut back anyway...
[clop clop]

12
GUARD #2: Wait a minute -- supposing two swallows carried it together?
GUARD #1: No, they'd have to have it on a line.
GUARD #2: Well, simple! They'd just use a standard creeper!
GUARD #1: What, held under the dorsal guiding feathers?
GUARD #2: Well, why not?