some half way mark......

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so im sitting here dictating to marina what to write, because i am banned from using any electronic devices - even legal ones. why am i banned, you might ask. well, here's the tale
wednesday started out as any old day- got up way too early after a big night out, went to class, then went to the library to work on a slideshow for ewa marciniak.
then promptly found myself back in my bed for some unknown reason, with a nurse checking my blood pressure and marina looking awfully concerned from a distance. turns out i had an epileptic seizure- got no memory, but boy am i feeling it now. i ripped a chunk out of my tongue, which is now the size of a beachball. the result is painful eating, talking, swallowing and drinking. breathing is interesting as well.
after being entirely discombobulated for at least an hour, ewa thought it would be prudent to take me to the hospital - not just the hospital but the emergency ward, to make me feel extra special. marina valiently tagged along BECAUSE SHE IS AWESOME (okay that bit peri didnt say, but i know she was thinking it).
after about4 hours in hospital where i was the victim of gross sexual misconduct by a smiling doctor but got to ride in a cat scan machine so he's forgiven, i was told i have a benign brain tumour.
YES, BRAIN TUMOUR...
but its ok, because according to my specialist, 'its old, like the world'. well thats reassuring......
so, until a proper disgnosis, including what triggered the exciting episode in the library, im barely allowed to pee by myself.

I CAN NOT:
go on the internet (hence marina the fantastic is dictating)
go on any computers at all
read any emails (marina now knows all my deepest darkest secrets...and passwords. i dont know which is more concerning. by her sadistic nature, i would say the passwords...)
watch movies
watch tv
read a book
travel by myself (not even to tesco)
do drugs (dammit)
smoke (which is, you know, totally devastating for my pack a day habit)
play on my laptop (which marina has commandeered)
lift any heavy objects
go for a run or do any physical exercise (pah, excuses!)
drink alcohol (baha sux to be u!!!!)
sleep by myself in the monastery - even though marina has a first aid certificate, clearly thats not enough and i need to sleep at ewa's house until further notice.
and im on medication that will make me FAT (sorry mat)

I CAN:
listen to emails
lie horizontally in my bed.
sleep
walk very slowly

however, i do get boxes of chocolates, and i get to sleep in and have days off school, much to marina's disgust (peri's a lazy sod )
so at the end of the day, what would you choose?
the brain tumour?
or the chococlates?

all of you people stressing just remember
its as old as the world, and its a well documented fact that chocolate makes you happy, so send me heaps. they dont have cadbury here.
or milo.
just a thought.

love peri

p.s im getting a better idea of my condition this week by two different specialists, and will keep you posted the best i can without using any form of modern technology or writing a letter, which im also not allowed to do.
😊

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