Early Mornings Musings

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Its so strange how you can meet a complete stranger, someone with a completely different upbringing than your own, and in only a few short words of conversation you can click instantly. Some how you can relate to them as if you have known them for 50 years and you can understand each other more in that short time than some friends you have truly known a lifetime. I find this to be one of the most special things about travelling, something I had my first taste of on El Camino, and something up until the last few days I hadn't yet stumbled across in Italy. The amazing thing to me about that Camino was that I was meeting people from literally every country all over the world, men, women, rich, poor.. everyone from every walk of life. And as I soon discovered in our late night chats, stuck in a crumbling albergue in a tiny village somewhere in the mountains of Spain, I could relate to so many of these people who, appearances aside, I literally had nothing in common with. One of my favorite people I met was an 82 year old South African farmer who had JUST retired and therefore decided to go do an 836 km walk across Spain. He started every single day with a ham & cheese "bach-ay-dilllll-lo" (bocadillo, pronounced "bo-ka-dee-yo" in Spanish), smoked like a chimney all day long on the Camino, and drank ONLY cervezas every evening. As I said, couldn't be two more different people. But some how I would find myself getting lost in hours of conversations with this fascinating relic. He told me war stories, horror stories of growing up in Segregation, falling in love with his wife, he even wept a tear when he told me how proud he was when his eldest son became a pilot for the South African Air Force, following in his own footsteps. I will never forget those talks, and I still to this day have no doubt that he is still alive and well, smoking & drinking and working 10+ hours a day herding his sheep all over the African landscape.

Now skip back to Venice. As in my previous blog I mentioned having met a group of amazingly wonderful Venetians several nights ago. Well since then I have actually spent every evening enjoying their company and making new memories with these new friends. One of whom in particular I have gotten to be quite close with. A most genuine, humble and wonderful person. And as I said, we are two different people coming from two very different lives, but yet some how some way, I swear he is the male version of myself haha. Even so much that last night he told me he actually felt I could be the female him. I almost died right on the spot in shock and awe of the strange parallel image I have been blessed to meet. How even a male & female in the same country could be so similar or have the very same outlooks on life I don't ever know, so please don't ask me how someone I relate so much to this Italian fellow, also 5 years older than myself. The strangest part was even how we met, as I said my friend Alexandra and I had just been making our way home that Wednesday evening when we were pulled aside by this group of young Venetians for a drink. And after havig been there for several minutes already, my new fabulous gay friend turned to introduce me to his brother who had just arrived. Next thing you know, it is four hours later and we have shared some of the most diverse conversations I have had with anyone, let alone an Italian stranger. And on that Wednesday night, when I was supposed to still be in the mountains with the family, but had taken the train home that day so to be in attendance for my test in school the next day. The chances of us having ever met were basically 1 in a million. And yet some how in some unknown turn of events, we did. And I am so very thankful for this.

There is something to being said to the power of human connection. Chemistry some would also call it. But I think there is a very different way of looking at this also because some would argue that chemistry is purely physical and a hormonal reaction. So then what do you call it when it is as if your brains some how connect? There are many times in our lives when we lock eyes with someone and feel a physical sense of connection. That is human nature to feel sexual tendencies, we are after all just animals. But I think it is so truly rare to meet someone who you can click with on a totally different intellectual level. After only three days of knowing each other, I think we have already managed to share most of the significant basic details of our lives with one another. But yet even in just listening to the stories he tells and opinions he shares, I feel frequently like he has managed to steal inside my own brain and extract the exact thoughts I am either currently thinking, or have at one time in my life thought. My mother and I quite often have this experience, we will say the exact same thing at the same time, or even the other day we called each other to FaceTime and we were both standing in the bathroom literally brushing our hair in to a ponytail. These sort of things, they seriously freak me out sometimes! But yet it also just blows my mind to think how powerful thoughts and emotions really can be. We are truly forces in our own lives, and whether or not we chose to see it.. we have the power to create and be anything that we set our minds to.

I have been living in Italy for just over a month now, I was starting to get down on the fact I hadn't been able to meet anyone here similar to me, or make some friends I had anything in common with. And then Wednesday evening with no rhyme or reason or plan in my mind, I set out in a positive spirit determined that Carnevale was going to bring me some LUCK in whatever way it wanted to. And low and behold, not only did I meet a group of wonderful people, I had a friend who I believe will now firmly stay implanted in my life for all the years to come. As if my positive energy had drawn him my way, the forces of my own thoughts and "willed him in to being". And the strangest part of all: those were his exact words to me our first night in conversation as I told him how thrilled I was to have met someone who not only spoke fluent English, but was also such a fantastic person! And even better, he happens to be an absolute linguistical genuis and can help me to further my Italian! Or French, Spanish or even German. Yes strangely enough, he is an Italian by birth but carries a very German surname. Just as I do haha.

The more we had talked, the more the similarities begin to arise. And where in the beginning it almost freaked me out, now I would be more shocked if we were to discover we DIDN'T have something in common. It is just that strange. Perhaps even the best part of all, although we have shared many enlightening thoughts & views, we have also discovered there is a shared reason for why we are at this stage in our life. Both of us have seen and had some pain also. And even before I knew the details, I had this sense. From my own personal experience and from what the world has taught me through encounters, is that the most happy of people are generally those who have also seen the other side. To have known true pain, means that when the light returns to your world, you are able to fully appreciate just how very rare and special that is. Even this new friendship of mine, perhaps if we had met even two weeks before when I had been in a bit of a "funk", I dont think it would have produced the same connection that it has. Or if I had been home in Canada, stuck in the same day to day routine that led me to believe nothing extraordinary can ever really happen. And as most of you know I have been struggling a bit to find my groove here. Many mornings I have wondered exactly what I am doing here or why I can't seem to fit in entirely. As I have said previously, Italy is a beautiful country to visit! But living here has proved to be an entirely different experience haha. (although the more I am told and discover, this sense of "private life" and keeping to themselves is a very Northern Italian characteristic). I still do not know what exactly brought me to Venice, I mean being an au pair for the family obviously. But I do not believe now that was the real reason for me coming here. There is something else I was meant to discover or find, and that is still left to the unknown. But I at least for now have a renewed sense of purpose and being. Whatever it was, some driving force within myself and the universe brought me back here to Europe, to be in this very city and this very moment for a reason. As you can tell with this blog this morning, even my sense of creativity has been refueled simply through the amazing chats I have shared in the last several days. So even for that fact I feel truly blessed to have met the people I have. Writing has always been such a passion of mine, and for the last several years it almost died inside me, along with my spirit to live life to the fullest. And dare I say it, for I don't want to "jinx" her return.. I think in fact that the true Brittany is returning.

That is the true beauty of living abroad my friends. Yes travel is amazing simply to try delicious new food, see epic monuments and bask in the wonder of breathtaking sceneries. But what I feel is really the best part, is being thrust out of your own environment and your own comfort zone. Having yourself exposed to life, vulnerable even, and just being wide open to the possibilities that await you! I am here, no return ticket, no real "plan", and no next step.. two months ago that terrified me a bit. This morning, it is that knowledge which literally makes my toes tingle, and fuels every fibre of my being to just.. BE. I do not know what comes next. And for the first time, that doesn't scare me.. it EMPOWERS ME!

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