the power of facial hair

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The Incredible Unibrow

We finally arrived in Dingle. I have the sneaky suspicion that the view on the way in was amazing, but due to the pitch black and thick coating of clouds above us, we had no light to see it. I fell asleep in the car about 20 minutes from our destination and was awoken by a tall dark haired irsih man with large teeth, who reeked of cigarettes. As the dome light came on I could see clearly, the greatest and most epic unibrow in the history of all mankind. I’m talking from caveman days to Animal from the muppett babies, our bed and breakfast host Tom had the most prominent facial hair feature since Hitler’s mustache. He also put out the, “I have cameras in your room, I have bodies in the backyard, enjoy your stay vibe.” It turned out his son has autism, so Tara explained that he’s not chemically crazy, just crazy by trial. Sleep sleep.

Today we explored the Dingle Pennisula. I might as well get this out of the way, yes, the place is really called Dingle, yes tara took pictures of berries and yes, I have already made every possible dingleberry joke you can think of. To anyone who doesn’t know what a dingleberry is, it’s the doo doo that hangs on to dear life on your little brown ring or from an anus hair. Most often, it escapes the toilet wipe and causes you nothing but smelly grief.

Let’s get serious. I have come up with an equation to help everyone understand what Ireland could be, but isn’t.

Ireland - Pubs + Clubs = Ultimate Detox

This place really is a refreshing breath of clean air. The ocean and air in general is so clean and nice, even in the heavily congested areas its pretty damn good. You know those cheesey gum or fragrance commercials that peddle over blown freshness feelings up your ass? Ireland is one of those that delivers in a natural way. I had a cold breeze on my neck just a while ago and it was equal to the touch of woman on your neck pre foreplay. I wish I had a better way of describing it, but hey, I’m still me.

I was laying on the edge of a cliff and I was over looking the water. I had earlier asked Tara why she kept taking me to places she had already been. In my head, I assumed she would want to see or experience something new. I never really got the answer I was looking for which begs the questions, did Tara not have an answer, or did she know I would find it on my own and did not need to answer? I found it while laying on the cliffs staring down at the ocean. You’d think that any ocean seaside drive is probably the same as all the others, and in some ways that’s true. I’ve driven the west and east coasts almost in their entireity in the U.S. But here was something different. As I stared at the ocean I felt like the ocean was a person or a collective of people staring right back at me. It was hypnotizing in a way. The white ripples were like tiny little hands all waving at my pupils and the back of my brain. There was my answer.

My follow up to a profound moment, was finding two donkeys in a pasture. One was tiny and sleeping (tara) and the other was standing up over her, licking its own ass (brian, and no pun intended on the ass part).

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Photos

Dingleberries
Please do not eat the dingleberries

White People
Thank god the background wasn't white could this would be a picture of hair and pants.

Not a picture
I painted this while i was bored last night.

Standing
Now i have two kinds of crabs.

My back side
This cliff was like a half mile climb straight up.

Cliffs of Tata
I'm peeping on a couple making sand whopee

The Long Drop
And this is where Tara disappeared.

donkeys1
Brian and Tara

Comments

[Cory]

The Ocean
There is an Ocean in my soul, where the waters do not curve.