Fee Fi HO-HO Hum, What Not to do in Dublin

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We’d had completely filled our day before and still had a partial day to fill after overnighting in Dublin. While every minute seemed well planned out for that first day, it could just be that we lucked out when our bus driver had come up with a Plan B to get us back to the ship; albeit, one-half hour late. The “Big Horse Show” had started yesterday and it had taken one couple two-and-one-half hours to take the Shuttle from downtown Dublin (by Merrion Square) back to the ship at the pier. At least our evening plans hadn’t gone up in smoke in a traffic jam. We took our good time about getting up, grabbed a bite to eat in the Lido, and I made sure to get a banana. I’m guessing that those Icelandic bananas are just about gone because the one I got this morning was pretty green. Ignoring the advice of Claudia, to be sure and take some Euros with you, we ventured off the ship with a camera and a smile.

As Claudia had promised, we were able to purchase a two-way shuttle fare right at the shuttle as we got off the ship with our cabin key. The shuttle ride was considerably longer than one could walk, it seemed to take 20 minutes. We passed the Jeanie Johnston, a replica of a tall sailing ship that had once ferried refuges on a 6-week ordeal to a better life in North America. Just after we passed the ship, were the bronze statues of emaciated Irishmen making their way to board in hopes of finding that better life. There are matching statues in Boston, and Sharon plans to see those someday. How could Sharon know that this would be her best chance to take photos of these sights on this trip to Ireland? We were by in a flash before Sharon could take the camera out of the bag. Later in the day we would pass by on the Hop-On-Hop-Off Bus (HO-HO) and on the return shuttle; but both would be in the opposite direction making taking pictures more difficult across traffic.

We got dropped off mear Merrion Square which pretty much felt like getting dropped in the middle of town. This locale was our lifeline to get back to the ship; so, we’d better not forget where it is which could be a problem with me losing my memory and all! We’d already spotted the Red HO-HO and the Green HO-HO and Sharon recalled that our guide the day before mentioned the Red HO-HO did canned narrations; while, the Green HO-HO does live narrations. We saw a Green HO-HO pull up nearby and asked about getting tickets. On the bus it was “Cash Only”… and that would be those Euros that Claudia reminded us to have with us. The Bus Driver directed us to a nearby hotel where they might accept a credit card and where we could buy the tickets. At the front desk there were placards offering HO-HO tickets; but, they did not accept credit cards. I asked about changing money. It’s when I realized in my driving about Dublin during the past day I hadn’t seen one Currency Exchange office or kiosk which seem to predominate mainland European cities. He thought about my question, then called a friend working in the hotel across the busy street. He said he would take us there, and showed us how to jaywalk across a busy Irish street where driver’s are on the “correct” side of the road. It’s the double-decker busses that you need to watch out for! His friend was able to get me change for $60 US currency. It’s fortunate I had that with me! The rate included a nice 10% premium for the hotel; so, this isn’t where you’d want to be trading currencies.

Back to the HO-HO pickup spot, and the Green HO-HO was just pulling up. With fare in hand we boarded. Being seniors, we got the discount and our two tickets only cost us 36 Euros for a one-day pass. I still had 11 Euros and change to spare. We found seats above on this two-decker near the front, and when the people in front got off in a couple spots, we got the front seats which were nice for looking out and taking pictures. The narration was clear and understandable and seemed to match where we were; but, it was not a live narration as Sharon had researched. The very bland delivery could almost put a soul to sleep, especially if you’d had a busy day the day before. The HO-HO makes sense if you have the time (several days) to explore Dublin on your own; but, with a limited time schedule and needing to be back to the ship before it sails, this did little more than take you by the various points that you could get off and then take some pictures, or go to Trinity College, or go to the zoo, or go to some Museum. For us, it was a two-hour plus ordeal, and when the bus reached the end of the route, we needed to get off and get on another bus, and poof, there went our great seats. We saw virtually nothing from the lower deck. This second bus did however have live narration, not that you could understand him. His Irish accent was thick, and he spoke fast as if you were hanging on every word with anticipation. And we might have tried to do that; except, there was a family behind us that had long ago given up on caring what the driver had to say. They were chatting away on their phones and then about their grandson Little Billy who’s only six and already a teenager… doesn’t want to do anything but sleep and lay around all day doing nothing. And they spoke with a clarity of purpose that assured that everyone on the lower level was up to date on all of the family gossip.

Mercifully, we returned to Merriam Square. Our tour guide from the day before had mentioned Kennedy’s Pub just around the corner and has been serving diners since 1850. We’d spotted it when we went looking for Euros. Our plan now was to get some lunch in an Irish Pub and catch the shuttle back to the ship. We checked that they accepted credit cards, and they do; but, not American Express… which was fine for us. Sharon opted for the halibut fish and chips and a 7-up. I decided to try the mushroom tarragon soup and the Indian curry chicken. And I got a red Irish Ale. Sharon got the single biggest filet I’ve ever seen for fish and chips, extending beyond at both ends the paper it was wrapped in. She liked it except for those black things. I’m not sure if she was talking about veins in the fish. I tried a small bite and it was very good. My soup was unique and quite good as well and the Indian Chicken Curry with rice I would call typical. I paid with the credit card, which had no provision for a tip, so I’m assuming like many European countries the tip was included in the price of the meal; although, the menu made no mention of that as they normally do in places like Germany or France. I figured, what the heck… this is our last Euro-country stop so I’ll just leave her the change from the bus tickets and hope that she’s not too offended. It’s better that than take it home with me where it will just sit in some box and be forgotten.

We got the shuttle back to the ship and passed by those statues, but traffic blocked any good view. Two couples on the shuttle had obviously eaten at Kennedy’s as well. One of them was talking about his brother-in-law who had used Über to take him to the oldest Pub in Dublin. “That’s going to cost him 20 Euros, and 20 Euros back again.” The one he was talking to said, “That seems like a lot for bragging rights.” “Yeah, I just walked across the street, ate at a pub that’s been in business since 1850 plus had a good meal at Kennedy’s”. We went back to our cabin and grabbed what we needed for Trivia. It looked like we might be alone; but, Jim and Rose Marie arrived, and we had our team for today. Little did we know that we would need our Canadian friends as well. I was acting as both the scribe and recording questions for my spreadsheet; since Duncan normally is the scribe. Linda asked, “The equator does NOT pass through which country: (a) Colombia, (b) Venezuela, (c) Kenya, (d) Somalia, or (e) Egypt?” I suggested “Venezuela”, and I thought that we had agreed on that. Jim suggested “Egypt” and I agreed that it might be. I went with my suggestion, which is the danger of my being the scribe. I guess everyone else thought that we’d agreed on “Egypt” and Linda’s answer was indeed “Egypt”. Jim was a bit miffed that we’d missed that question. When I checked Linda’s facts later, I found out that the equator does not pass through Venezuela either! I can see that Linda and I will need to have words. But according to Linda, arguing with her over an answer is considered “Unsportsmanlike Conduct” and is grounds for subtracting points. “In 1930 what building was overtaken by another, as the tallest man-built structure in the world?” From the year, she must be referring to the Empire State Building which opened in 1931. I knew the answer, and Jim suggested “The Eifel Tower”, which is correct. When Linda announced the answer, Jim asks me, “Did you write that down?” We had no idea what sport was outlawed in 2005 by Pakistan because of too many deaths and injuries. Our choices were Pig Racing, Golfing, Kite Flying or Tug-of-War. I thought possibly Golfing; but, Jim was urging “Kite Flying” so I wrote that down. When Linda announced that it was indeed “Kite Flying” Jim again asked, “Did you write that one down?” I’m thinking maybe I don’t want to be the scribe any more. Linda wanted to know, “What famous celebrity married Conrad Hilton, George Sanders, Herbert Hutner and Jack Ryan (among others). One of her husbands had his nuptuals annulled within one day!” We hadn’t heard that last part of the clue which evidently helped a number of teams, and when we heard the answer we all said, “Of course.” Our answer of Elizabeth Taylor wasn’t one that any of us believed in; besides, Eddie Fischer and Richard Burton weren’t in the list. The answer, of course, was Zsa Zsa Gabor. For the bonus question Linda wanted to do some “Trivia Math”. Write the equation and result for the number of sisters in “Little Women” PLUS the number of ghosts in Charles Dickens’ “A Christmas Carol” PLUS the number of Canadian provinces. This is where we could have used some help from Duncan and Pam. We wrote down “4 + 4 + 9 = 17”; but, we were missing one of those pesky provinces. Consequently, we only got 2 of the 4 possible bonus points. Our reported Score was 13 out of a possible 23 points. Linda had allowed two points for naming the actor and actress with the most Oscar nominations (we got Meryl Streep right), two points for knowing what “OG” means to a stamp collector (it was in my spreadsheet = Original Gum, one point for each word) and one point each for the two states that each have three consecutive vowels. Linda claimed that in the past there is always that team trying to find that third state. The actor was Jack Nicholson and those states: the Aloha State and the Cajun State. After checking the score, we noticed that we’d only gotten 1 point credit for “OG”, combined with the equator question, we were still short of the winner who had 18 points.

Dinner found me dining by myself again. Sharon decided she wanted to eat quickly in the Lido instead. I sat at a table for six with two other couples. The two ladies were sitting next to each other and I was sitting next to one of the men. Sharon’s place was unmistakably vacant. The two ladies were chatting away about kids and grandkids when the two men found a common bond in their military service and it looked like it might be a long night for me. I had wanted to eat here tonight because they were serving the jumbo shrimp cocktail with traditional cocktail sauce. I had them give me a side of horseradish to up the octane; which it did, and the fresh large shrimp were great. I was looking to eat a bit lighter since I’ve had a couple of larger off-ship meals, and I’d hate to lose control now that I’m half-way home. I chose the steak salad entrée, and I enjoyed what they served me with sesame dressing. Some of the steak was a bit chewy and hard to cut. The one man mentioned that after he retired from the Army, where he’d spent his later years working in the Pentagon, at the behest of his boss he took a position as an assistant to the undersecretary responsible for fundraising for the national zoo. He said that that turned into a second twenty-year career. As part of his position, he would set up Safaris in Botswana, Kenya, Zambia and South Africa; until, the political unrest in Kenya put an end to this fund-raising venue. He related his most memorable story occurring in Botswana when they were driving around in a two-tiered open Range Rover. He was enjoying taking pictures of elephants that they’d spotted. One was a younger bull elephant who was obviously in musth (in heat) and his hormone charged state had caused a massive amount of secretions down his face and trunk. His wife interrupted him at this point, saying, “You never tell this part right.” She continued, “He was standing up, taking a video and narrating… ‘Now we’ve come across a young bull elephant in heat…’ He’s panning the camera and describing the rest of the herd. He doesn’t notice that the young bull has suddenly taken and interest in him, he’s turning, he’s charging. And Clint is standing there taking pictures.” She holds her hands as if framing the shot, and then turning the shot back towards the charging elephant. She then starts vibrating her hands to show extreme panic in the filming, “And he says, ‘Oh, s*#%!’”. Her husband Clint is in stitches, he obviously loves hearing her tell this favorite story. He later asked their guide why he didn’t seem concerned. Their guide told them, “Oh he was only trying to scare you… he wasn’t going to charge us!” Clint wanted to know how the guide could be so sure. “He had his trunk up… he was just posturing for you. If his trunk was down and he lowered his head, that would be the time to worry!” Clint’s wife also told a amusing story about their grandson when he was about ten years old. He had noticed that his grandparents didn’t go to work like his parents and wondered where they got their money. She told him about saving, retirement, and pensions. He thought about that, and then wondered, what happens to your savings if you die? She then told him about estate planning and wills. He asked if his grandmother had a will, and she said, “We do.” “But grandma, with all these cruises that you take, what happens if you run out of money.” “Well, then we come live with you.” Clint said that he had told his son that this Voyage of the Vikings Cruise was a ski vacation. His son had said, “But dad, you don’t ski.” He told his son, “No you don’t understand: A ‘SKI’ vacation… a Spend Kid’s Inheritance vacation!

I met up with Sharon after dinner back in the cabin, and we went to see the show “Shades of Buble”. Linda introduced the trio with a joke. The punchline came down to a fundraiser at a Catholic School. The nun was noting that one apple, specially picked from the school’s private orchard, had been reserved for each donor. She entreated them to take just one; because, God is Watching. A girl then spoke, offering the donors chocolate chip cookies (I think Linda must be reading the blog, and is offering this to Sharon). The girl continues, “You’re supposed to take just one; but, take as many as you want because God is watching the apples!” The three sang songs that most of us were familiar with; and, their voices are very good.

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