The Dish on London

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So, after a week of not updating, I'd say it's about time! Don't worry I'm still alive, but I literally haven't had enough time, or internet access to be able to update this thing unfortunately.

Tonight, well yesterday actually, was officially my last night in Paris, because I'm leaving for Lyon today! Paris stories to follow, because I still haven't told my London ones!

Saturday was a nice day, after waking up and taking a shower, I felt a lot better and I told myself I was going to go out and have fun and make up everything for the previously unpleasant day of my naissance. Julien was feeling tired and lazy, so after we woke up and talked for awhile, I decided to go out by myself and explore, and meet up with him around 3 at Picadilly Circus tube station. Voilà! So I went to all the big places in London, which, unlike most cities, are all really close together...walking distance, even though the city itself is huge, all of the fun stuff is pretty much in the same proximity. ANYWAYS, I saw Big Ben, the River Thames, which is in great competition with La Seine of Paris for being the dirtiest river I've seen thus far, the London Eye; Westminster Abbey; Harrod's... hmmm what else? Oh, of course Trafalgar Square and Buckingham Palace... Trafalgar Square is one of my favorite places, it's really big and touristy, but there is always something going on there and I feel peaceful when I sit on the steps and watch the city life go by. That day, there was actually a huge protest at Trafalgar, something to do with supressing the British BNP party and not allowing it to become a major power, and how the mayor of London is a racist and such, because he abolished London's annual anti racism party festival thing. It was interesting but my memory is failing me now detail wise!

After the protest and walking all day around London, I took the tube to meet Julien at Piccadilly, where we ate, of all places, at McDonald's... haha. Cheap and not so delicious, but it was easier that way because there was also some free concert in the park we wanted to see at Leicester Square's litte mini park. Then we walked around while he waiting for his Frenchie friend to call him to see what we would do that night. After waiting for awhile, he decided that it'd be easier for me to just go out by myself and meet up with at 2 30 am at the Elephant and Castle station. I was not eager to go out and party on the town alone, but I figured it couldn't be too bad, it's what I'd done, essentially, in Dublin and it turned out to be not so bad and a good way to meet people. Meet people I did.

After having no clue which club I could possibly go to, I stopped quickly in a net café and looked up local clubs. I ended up going to this place called Sound, in Leicester square... it was only 5 euro to get in, but oh boy were the drinks expensive! I know you're going to kill me for this dad, but I ended up dropping about 60 euros that night for drinks! But don't worry, there's a legit reason to follow... I promise! After the club being empty, I decided my best option was to start off with a couple drinks, of which I paid for in cash. Then after telling some Latvian girl a made up story about how I was on holidays with the love of my life and we just got into a fight and he told me if I didn't see him at sound at 10 30, then it was over forever...
at around 10 25, I started to dislike Julien for leaving me to go out alone. So... one more drink, on my debit card... but the only problem was, I had to spent at least fifty euros worth of drinks in order to use my card, which the guy didn't tell me until after he made the drink, so I thought... why not? Just one big night won't kill me. But it will, of course.. be interesting!

After things picked up on the dancefloor, it was fun running around drunk and telling random British guys that they were attractive, but not marriage material because Irish boys were better and the English are assholes, I decided to take it down a notch and go sit at a table. Then I ended up meeting this group of girls who were having a "hen" party, basically the same thing as a bachelorette party, but with a lamer name! It was fun...dancing and taking pictures with them and playing with the naked inflatable doll and such. Then, after I met these two Malaysian girls and they helped me get rid of some weirdo trying to dance with me, it was time for more drinks. As I was waiting on the bar, some creepy old and very short and dark Indian guy comes up to me and starts to ask me if he buys me a drink, will that give him the right to touch me all night? Of course I said no and kicked his shins, which didn't prevent him from proceeding to touch me..fucking creepo! So I asked the girls next to me to tell him I was gay, and after making friends with them, he still continued to follow and stare at me, but from a distance, thankfully. The two girls were actually with a bigger group of Japanese girls, who I spoke very bad drunken Japanese with. Unfortunately, I had to deal with two other horrible men following Indiana Jones... some well dressed, cute guy from Paris, who suddenly became uncute when his breath smelled like the sewers, and some nutso Egyptian who had a gross blue mole right on the tip of his nostril, and found it sexy to lick my face while I made faces of disgust and pretended to puke. All of these losers also insisted on me going home with them, please tonight... i'm a nice guy yadda yadda. I just responded with, if you're nice, you can wait... give me your phone number and i'll call you when i'm dead.

So that pretty much sums up my night, except after some other lunatic asks me the same question, except he was drunk enough to give me five pounds and buy me a flower, for no reason in particular. I actually used the five pounds he gave me for the bus ride home, which sucked, because I didn't end up leaving until 6, and Julien was asleep so he couldn't open the door. I had to ring the doorbell, looking like some kind of dead girl because of my fatigue, worn out makeup and ultra frizzy hair, due to the stupid rain. But the Polish family Julien lived with were actually really nice. Except Julien was grumpy and lazy and never wanted to do anything when he wasn't working, so that was kind of annoying. He also wasn't talkative either, so it was really awkward to be in the same room, sitting in complete silence because your attempts at friendly conversation somehow weren't intercepted.


I spent Sunday morning sleeping in late, feeling pretty strung out, but getting forced to go out and explore London once again by Julien, so he could lay in bed all day... pretty much basically. Grincheux grumpymcpants! The other two days I explore more of London, like Hyde Park, and Tottenham Hale and the area around Victoria Station, then I would come home as late as possible without waking up anyone. Oh yeah, and there was a music festival at Trafalgar Square on Tuesday night, which was the same day I met this really cute Polish guy named Dominic at the Internet café, but he couldn't go out with me that night because he had a new flatmate, oh well. I still have his email but I wrote it on the back of a receipt and I think I probably threw it away by accident. Thankfully, I forced him to take a picture, posed as a Japanese tourist, so I can always remember his beautiful face!

That's about it for now!

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