Starting out

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Fireworks are more interesting when they go sideways, that is a fact. Guatemalan´s grasp this and live by the unwritten rule that 5% of all fireworks must explode on buildings, roadways, or sidewalks. This wouldn´t have much consequence, but fireworks are used to celebrate EVERYTHING here (it´s the 6th aniversary of your mother-in-law´s kidney stone operation? Light ´em up), and so through sheer volume there is a lot of exploding going on. My second day here there was a funeral procession marchig through Central Park, singing hymns and reaking of incense and catholicism, when a firework landed 20 meters behind them, glowed red for an instant, and then exploded in a shower of sparks and a plethora of international curse words. It was a good moment.

Ok, the basics. The family I am staying with is incredibly friendly, and very patient with my terrible Spanish. The mother likes me because I love her cooking, and the family consensus is that I look like Jesus, which I think is a big plus down here. We are bonding.

You want stories you say? Well one of the highlights so far was climbing Volcan Pacaya, Guatemalas most active peak. We arrived near the summit as the sunset, mist swirling in a stiff breeze, the lava flows glowing deep red on the charcoal black backgroud... it was like something out of The Lord of the Rings, except we roasted marshmallows in the lava instead of pushing Orcs into it. Rest assured, that is just as mystical.

On Saturday I jumped on a chicken bus, flying solo, and went to San Andres Itzapa to visit the shrine of San Simon (that´s Saint Simon to you gringos). He is some sort of Mayan appropriation of the Catholic tradition,aharddrinkin´, cigar smokin´, womanizin´kind of Saint who grants wishes in exchange for offerings of rum. Now THAT´S a religion.

Outside the shrine is a courtyard where devotees burn massive piles of cigars and bathe in the smoke to cleanse their souls. Inside there are no lights, just hundreds of candles on metal tables, placed by worshippers as prayers. Each color of candle is for something different, anything from love to protection from enemies to help in study. At the front of the room is a mannequin dressed in a suit, or San Simon, depending how you look at these things. People walk one-by-one up to the alter, splashing the effigy with hard liquor as an offering, and downing shots themselves for good measure. After they take the booze dripping of San Simon´s garmets and rub it all over their bodies; this is followed by prayer. Some of the hardcore old ladies cover bouquets of flowers in the holy alcoholic mixture and then beat themselves or others with the flora as a cleansing.

I splashed some rum, said a quick hello, and lit a candle for protection while travelling. Hopefully, that ensures nothing but good days ahead.

I will keep you posted

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