Norway and India

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Dearest readers,

Welcome to the last blog. I hope that you have had a pleasant journey. For the final blog, please may I suggest you grab yourself a cup of tea and a biscuit? I think this will be quite the yarn.

Norway was the last European country which we ventured to in our travels. We arrived in Norway after having caught our last train on the Eurail pass. Arriving rather late into Oslo we took our bags to our accommodation 4km from the centre of town. After we had got ourselves settled, we made the journey a small way into town, had some dinner and met up with Owen and Marte at their lovely apartment. In Norway, people do not venture out of their houses until after many pre-drinks as drinks in Norway are amazingly, extroadinarily expensive. So after a few beers, we ventured into the trendier, Brunswick-esque part of town only to find drunken people hanging out of windows and bars overly full. Nick and I were more than happy to roam the streets but Owen and Marte were determined to find somewhere cool enough for us to go into. Whilst they talked bars, Nick and I talked about how happy we were to have a new gang (despite Owen and Marte not knowing about it). After a few unsuccessful hours, we made the 2am walk 25minutes back to the Christian hostel where we were greeted by an audio tape about God.

The next day was all about getting our laundry done, but the following day the Oslo adventure was back on track - and this time smelling of Napysan. We went to a very cool park called Frognerparken which holds the world famous Vigeland Sculpture Park. The sculptures start at the beginning of a long bridge with one every meter which takes you to a giant sphere which is covered in bodies. All of the sculputes are of naked people. Nicks favorite was the man who was kicking about 5 babies. All of the sculptures were extremely well made, and very ahem.. detailed. From there we walked back into town and FOUND CHRISTMAS MARKETS!!!!!! FINALLY!!! And an ice-skating rink. Very excitedly we checked out their wares, and heavy of heart we moved onto the Medieval Fortress which was down next to the docks. There we took some lovely photos of boats and walked very close behind a fortress guard. We also made up a new word - but that is neither here, there or wetlitard. Walking still, we made it back to the trendy part of Oslo and called Owen to rejoin us so we could experience first hand how expensive beer is from a bar (the answer is very - one bottled beer was AUD$17). We went to an Irish bar and it was here that we learned how fanatical people are here about English football. Apparently they go nuts for it. The bar was full, and as soon as the game was over it was very very empty. Good for business. Go EPL!

After Norway it was time to go back to England to say a final goodbye to my family. It was wonderful to see you all again, and thank you all your hospitality. I promise I wont leave it too long before I come and see you again (8 years is FAR too long without cuddles from your Nana and Grandad).

On our last night in England, we went to go and see Phantom of the Opera at Her Majestys Theatre. We had caught the train to London and were staying again in Pimlico near Victoria Station. We were staying at the Astor Victoria and I recommend that you never stay there, ever. We were told by a young woman who was eating her dinner and slouching rather unattractively in her chair that there were works in our part of the hostel. Rather skeptically we attempted to navigate our way to the room (there were no signs for the detour) and found that the works were loud sandblasters IN FRONT of our room. We had had a long trip, so I went to go and speak to the slouchy woman who got her "manager" to come and speak to us. He was unhelpful and offered us nothing in the way of compensation and said that they would be done by 5pm (they werent) and wouldnt start until 10am (they started at 7am). We left the sandblasting men to it and went to go and see the Phantom. I have been wanting to see it for ages and I did not leave disappointed. The actors were ok - nothing too special, but the music was absolutely extraordinary. We were very lucky and booked in advance so got seats in the middle of the second row.

The next day we decided to take it easy and stroll to Hyde Park, so we left our bags in the "secure" area and went out. At Hyde Park there was the Winter Wonderland which had lots of rides, food and Christmas markets. It was fantastic! We then had a plane to catch to Kuala Lumpur to headed back to the rubbish hostel. Would you believe it? Another problem! This time they had put down a varnish on the new floors - in front of the "secure" area and we couldnt get our bags for an hour. It was at this point that Nikita exploded inside and had to be removed from the room before her temper was unleashed on the Polish workmen. Thankfully the manager must've seen the restrained anger and upset the Poles by getting our bags out for us with minimal touching of the varnish. If it had been me, I would have gone all Tom Cruise, Risky Business on that floor.

Flight was successful and we arrived in KL unscathed and stayed at our lovely hotel with the MASSIVE bed and AMAZING shower. The next day, back to the airport and onto India!

Arriving into India was terrible. We were given the option to get collected from the airport but as the accommodation wasnt far from the main train station Nick figured that it couldnt be that hard. Unfortunately it was and we arrived into the worst part of town and walked around a slum, down a long dark street, venturing into another dark street where there were drug dealers and men carrying hooks. Considering that we had no idea what to expect, we didnt know then that when you are in parts like that you are DEFINITELY in the wrong part of town. We thankfully had some help from the police (who everyone says not to deal with as they are all corrupt - but our one was fine) which was mixed in with some bad advice from people pretending not to speak English. We were hassled constantly and I was hating every second. Finally after an hour and a half we were taken in the right direction by someone and got into the hotel. The hotel wasnt anything special and had cockroaches and ants all over the floor. I was thankful that panic attacks make you tired and we slept until very late in the day. Nick seeing that there was no way that I was going to cope with the rest of the India trip after the adventures of the previous night suggested that we go to the proper tourist board and get some advice and book some things. Being the only white people around though (we havent seen many at all) we were hassled every two steps with dodgy tour guides, tuk tuk drivers and rikshaws who all wanted to take us somewhere. No one in Delhi seems to understand the concept of 'just walking', they either want to take you somewhere or just want to chat (before asking to drive you somewhere) - so going for a walk is pretty pointless.

It is amazing how some people can change in the flick of an instant. They will talk to you for ages and just as you think they are lovely they want to sell you something. When you (really) politely decline, the change is tangible. Even trying to get to the end of the road to the train station was a hassle. What we wanted to do was sort out all of our India adventures ourselves, but it was just impossible with people talking to you, yelling at you or selling you something. You cannot possibly speak to one another without one of them sensing weakness and trying to capitalise on it. Additionally, everyone seems to want a tip. They talk to you, they point you in the right direction... you pay for it all if you have white skin. Eventually we found some official people (you can never tell though - you always have to be suspicious - most have fake badges) and he put us safely in a tuk tuk for 20rupees. He wanted to take us for 30 - but the official guy slapped him in the face. That was pretty hilarious.

We got to the tour guide and we booked in to do a tour with a driver for the rest of our time in Delhi. He was to take us to Agra and Jaipur and also take us on a tour around Delhi itself. The driver was called Rana and he was delightful. His English wasnt that good - so he was silent a lot of the time, but sometimes he would surprise you with how lovely he was. By the end of the trip he had invited us to come and stay with his family in the Himalayas several times and even tried to arrange for us to meet up with his brother at the army base on the way back from Jaipur. He said that he wanted us to come back and see him and to keep in touch by email.

I felt much better after booking the tour. He drove us back to the hostel via India Gate. The night-time sky in India is gorgeous. During the day Delhi is so very very polluted - the air is horrible, but at night it is this gorgeous colour of pink and purple. It was there that we had our first taste of the beautiful side of India, the people trying to sell you trash all the time and also how famous white people are. We had a whole family come up to us who wanted photos with us - for some of the photos they even had me holding their baby. All Indian kids are so friendly and just want to shake your hand and say hello and ask how you are. Another woman wanted to talk to us because her daughter was asking foreigners about India Gate. It was nice to meet people who didnt just want to be your friend so you would buy something off them.

After that I was actually excited about leaving the following day. Rana picked us up at 7.30am and we began the 4 hour trip to Agra. When you drive (through the hectic, road-ruleless streets) you are 1) happy to be alive when you arrive and 2) during the journey you are startled by the amount of rubbish, the cows, camels, goats, dogs, the slums - but there is this amazing contrast when you see the happiness of the people, the colours, the gorgeous kids and beautiful women, the architectual wonders and the cleanliness of the government owned historical sights. India is a place where you just cant stop looking. Everything is just so far from what you could ever imagine that its so hard to look away.

We saw Akbars Tomb, Agra Fort and the Taj Mahal. The buildings are like nothing you can imagine, they are so grand and the architecture is spectacular. Most of the places that we have seen have been this two-tone combination of red sandstone with these intricate designs all around and they quite often contrast this with white marble structures inside with large "entertaining areas". At the tomb we realised that everyone wants tips and they will get them by any means necessary. Because of Ranas English skills - or that maybe he doesnt know these things - he doesnt give you vital information like you need to take your shoes off or you cannot take cameras or that you need to buy a ticket - and how much it is or that there are sometimes entrances for foreigners OR that they from down on people bringing friends like Phillip. He was good to inform us about pickpockets and "guides" though. At the tomb we saw a sign for taking shoes off, but people were sitting there who would put covers over your feet (you should tip them) and that people will just start being your guide without being asked. After this first time where the tour was interesting, but there wasnt much too it and we hardly understood him we realised we had to be brutal and say no to everyone who does this very sternly. The Agra Fort was just huge and from one of the views you could see the Taj Mahal. There was not much inside but just the remains of the fort - which is more like a walled city.

The Taj Mahal was just as incredible as it looks in the photos - but better. We were to be there to see the sunset. The marble changes colour all the time depending on where the sun is - so it just looks glorious and ever-changing. We walked around and then up to the temple where we met the Indians idea of "lining up" which means pushing infront of the foreigners. They were actually pretty rude and when one family lined up in front of us, followed by another family 5 minutes later - an all out brawl started. I felt like telling them that they both were doing the wrong thing so could they please fight elsewhere? When we finally got inside we were rather disappointed as the lead up to get in (a line all the way around the temple). The legend is that Shah Jahan built the beautiful Taj Mahal for his wife, Mumtaz Mahal - and it is her tomb that lies in there with his installed when he passed after. The next day we were off for another 3 hour journey to Jaipur. We left a bit later in the day as we didnt have much to see in Jaipur and had to leave pretty early the following morning. On the way down though we saw the Monkey Temple (so many monkeys!!) and we were taken into different temples. We realised that when the guy locked us in one that he wanted money to give us a blessing. I have nothing against it - but I hate that they are demanding money from us for things that we havent asked for. So we left pretty annoyed at the place after Nick had badly cut his finger on the lock that the 'priest' used to lock us in within the highly infectious monkey temple. It was very cool though.

That night we had our cheapest meal so far - and it was at the hotel. It was very cool though as it was on the rooftop and there were some kids doing a puppet show and playing drums and singing. Everyone says that India is cheap. I agree - it is, if you speak Hindi. But if you dont, everything is double. That and Rana was taking us to all the places that were 'very famous' (read: very expensive and I get commission).

The next morning was a very early day as we had our Elephant Ride up to the Amber Fort. We also that morning met a tour guide - which we werent expecting - who was going to tell us all about Jaipur. The elephant ride was pretty cool and the elephants were all colourfully painted and gorgeous. The ride was very short and on our way up we were convinced into getting our photos taken on the elephant. They say you dont like, you dont buy. You do like - one photo 100rupee. Anyway- we got up to the top and our guide met us and took us around the fort. The fort was amazing and just huge. The king lived there with 12 of his favourite wives and had palaces for both summer and winter which were both made out of marble. On our way back down we found the photographers printer and were offered 10 photos for 1000rupees. What am I going to do with 10 photos? I only want two. No, no you take all 10 for 700 rupees. No, I only want two. No, you take, you take all for 500 rupees. No I want two, for 200 rupees. No, no you buy all for 300 rupees. But I only want TWO. No. NO! You take all 10 for 250 (he throws them at me as I am getting in the car). Sadly I took two, for two hundred, but they were both the same. I won and failed at the same time. Nice photo though. I know what Mum is getting for Xmas.

We then went to take a photo of the Waterpalace (closed due to government corruption) and then we went to the New Palace. The new palace wasnt as exciting as the old one (the fort) but it was still interesting all the same. From there we had lunch - Nick and I were talking about how much we would tip him, but thankfully he insulted me over food and we didnt have to. Hurray! The very quick tour which took a very long time was then over and it was another early night in the hostel before we were due to drive back to Delhi the next day.

The following day we again started early as the drive home took 6 hours. We got back early and just grabbed a tuk tuk to the Main Bazaar to look around. With all of our experience of people selling things and tuk tuks and rikshaws harassing us, we coped much better with all the people. We probably also didnt look as scared as we probably had been. So we had a nice time at the markets and bought a few small things.

The next day Rana took us on our tour of Delhi and sadly the English problem was a bit much and we were never entirely sure where he was taking us. He took us to a large and lovely temple, then to both the Indira and Mahatama Ghandi museums as well as another tomb (Akbars son) and a large park which had very old run down temples (where we got conned into giving a "fortune teller" money - well, I thought he was ok, but he wanted so much money, but when he looked at me it was this strange feeling he was looking right into me).

5 minutes before we were to be dropped at the station we got the call that our accommodation had fallen through. We were very annoyed and Rana couldnt organise anything for us with his friends for the same price. It wasnt handled the best, and we should have gotten more of a refund (or they should have put us up in a more expensive place at their expense). We paid for them to have organised all of this for us, so it was very disappointing that it happened this way. It was great to have a driver and see the things that we did, but it definately wasnt worth the amount of money that we spent for it.

We then hopped onto the 4.55pm train for Mumbai. The small compartments held 4 beds in each and the carriage was secured by a curtain. It wasnt the safest mode of transport, but boy do you get value for money. Sadly my malaria tablets got the better of me and I spent the majority of the journey asleep (spooning Barclay) but Nick had a food fiesta. First there was a sandwich, then there was soup, then there was a giant meal, then there was ice-cream. He was in heaven. Luckily for me, I was listening to Harry Potter again and was blissfully sleeping of my nausea. In the morning before we arrived, in my nauseus state I waited for the bathroom and watched one of the carriage workers empty the plastic bag out of the bin, and handscoop the remains of rice into the bag. He then proceeded to tie up the bag and shove it outside the train! Talk about counter-productive! The state of the trainlines was appalling, there are small communities sleeping next to the tracks, and there is more rubbish than at a tip. I was so appalled. No wonder it is as dirty as it is, look how people treat their country.

My amazing, wonderful, fantastic, terrific father sorted out the accommodation issue and we arrived into Mumbai with a bed for the remainder of the stay (thanks Papah!). There are no rikshaws and tuk tuks in Mumbai so we jumped in a taxi and had a less dangerous drive to the hostel. We arrived at the hostel and were taken to our room on the first floor. When you walk out of the elevator, notice to your left that there is no wall. Continue to your room and you will find that you thankfully have a bed, shower, toilet and a rather impressive lack of creepy crawlies. The only down-side is that there is slabs missing out of the wall, but hey, what do you need a wall for when you have 500 cable channels?

The next day we took the 15 minute walk into the main part of town - Colaba. On the way we saw the Chhatrapati Shivaji Terminus (the main railway station) which is rumoured to be the station that Melbourne should have got. It was massive and quite an impressive structure. Walking through the town we noticed that Mumbai is exceptionally different to everywhere else we have been in India. There is so much less pollution and there is no where near the amount of people, rubbish and beggars. Additionally there is minimal harassment by drivers and you can walk anywhere you want - hooray! We arrived into Colaba and walked down the main stretch of markets. We were approached by a lovely man who offered to take us on a tour of the Dhobi Ghat laundry and the Dhavari Slum. We agreed and headed off with him. Firstly he took us past the train station again and he also showed us the large university in Mumbai. There was also a large cricket pitch which is apparently amazingly popular. Indians are just cricket mad - and when they discover we are Australian they get so excited. We then made our way to Dhobi Ghat which is the worlds largest open air laundromat which has rows of concrete wash pens, each fitted with its own flogging stone which just exhudes the smell of detergent. We then headed to the Dhavari Slum which is one of the largest slums in the world. Amazingly, the slum has an exceptionally large economy and exports goods all over the world. The part of the slum which we went into was where they make all of these goods. We went into silk stores, plastic makers for jewellery parts, leather dying, recycling.. but they do much more. Additionally, what they are producing is exceptional work. When they live for as little as US$4 per month and the total (and largely informal) turnover is estimated to be between US$500-650 million per year, you wonder why they bother living in such conditions when they could make so much more doing what they do already in main Mumbai. It was phenomenal and as foreigners we were hardly paid attention to at all. It was a wonderous place.

We were then dropped back in Colaba with the hot tip that the Navy were in town that evening and there was going to be a music concert at India Gate. So we whiled away the time by looking through the markets and having a few drinks at the super famous Leopolds Cafe. We then headed to India Gate where we people-watched for a while and also listened to the orchestral music at the bottom of the gate - outside in the water there were also many Navy boats. As the night wore on, the pinkish purple sky became brighter and the boats all lit up the ocean.

The following day, having seen the highlights of Colaba and surrounds, we ventured to Chowpatty Beach and onto Hanging Garden atop of Malabar Hill. The walk to the beach took forever and we found it almost impossible to find a path to the other side of the railway tracks. When we eventually cut across we came by a group of "young ones" who were so excited to see us and wanted to walk with us along the beach strip. Along this strip you could see a marvellous view of Bombay and surrounds. The beach was very clean with the exception of a what appeared to be a pidgeon breeding ground (a whole area dedicated for feeding pidgeons) and there were also many people living there. We then attempted to walk up to the gardens, but as we were inexperienced in travelling we hadnt thought to take the shortcut up the long winding road. After an exceptionally long time we decided to hail a cab to take us to the top. The day was so hot and when we arrived finally we were very much over being famous white people. The gardens were very pretty and well manicured but we avoided the Tower of Silence where vultures eat dead bodies. There was also another gorgeous view of Bombay from the top of the hill.

On our final day in India the mission was to try and take photos of people in India - not an inconspicuous feat when everyone is already looking at you. We walked back to Colaba and saw a wedding and also filming of some Bollywood and placed ourselves once again on the side of the sea wall. There were many many photos taken of us and with us, some of the professional photographers even got to capitalise on it with Indian tourists wanting good photos with us. One of the photographers loved it so much he gave us a copy of one of them (for free!!!). We then took a quick stop for some refreshments and went back to seek shade in India Gate. Once there we were again approached but this time with more vigour. People couldnt get enough and there was no escaping. I had children given to me, and one of them I had to kiss. I had a sore jaw from smiling so much. Nothing can make you smile more broadly and honestly than an excited Indian, especially an excited Indian child. We eventually gave in and had to end the day prematurely. As we left India Gate we made friends with an older Indian man who himself had been travelling for a long time. He was lovely and wanted just to spend time with us, but sadly that is how it starts with getting on with a tour guide and we made our leave to go and get some food. We then made our sad last walk back to the hotel. We stopped next door for our final meal, which totalled $4.10 for us both and was the most delicious food ever.

Our trip to the airport was interesting. We had recruited the guy who took us on the Dhavari Slum tour, but he didnt have access to the taxi until later in the morning - so he sent his brother. The worst driver in the whole of India. There was a highlight though, with seeing the picture-perfect view of the Haji Ali mosque.

Well folks, we're home in 24 hours. Cant wait to see you.



Love to all.

NJ&NJ&Phillip

xxx

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Comments

[Ninja Toitle]

After crossing the fjord to get to Norway, I dropped in to see my distant cousin in Frognerparken. Kermit told me that he had spotted my elusive wabbit near the hanging balls. As I only found shriveled nuts; most probably due to the cold, I decided to go for a few drinks with me EPL mates before heading back to England as I knew my preciousssss would end up there. Too many drinks had I; missed plane did I. Eventually made it to the North; missed wabbit by a gnats pe$@s. Spoke to nice elderly couple, they said go south young Toitle and see Oprah, I mean opera. Spoke to the Phantom; his mask was not as good as mine, but he sang better than the guy on the boat. Told me to go where the best curry is, so went to India. Spoke to friendly young men with hooks; don’t know why they had them, they told me to go and speak to Taj. I was closing in; I can feel your presence Phillip. Following the trail to the fort, got crapped on by an elephant. After cleaning myself; just caught the train. Booked first class; top of train and slept under the stars, bit chilly at night and wind in your ears, but food was good. Checked into hotel where “hole in the Wall” gang stayed. Went for walk next day; spotted, I see the wabbit surrounded by people who want photo’s taken. I have you now I thought or said; it was one of them. When….. bang I was nabbed by some Navy boys and shipped out. Shipped out being all the way back to Dublin. So so close; you are a lucky wabbit. There will be a next time you wait and see.