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Published: November 18th 2014
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Hi5 your way to – Phuket Phuket is a tourist trap hell, no pavements, traffic everywhere, Tuk Tuk Mini vans with neon wheels and dance music blaring out, moped rainbows outside shopping malls, blistering relentless sun at 0800hrs, nowhere to hide, sest every direction, corruption on every mind. The Thai smile holds until the muscles relax and the tiredness shows from running the government gauntlet and annoyance of entertaining the white devil is visible on their faces and in their eyes.
Pissed off drivers, Polish pals from Denmark, party animals from London and Ze Germans all interact on a travelers tunes that glows with being away from the normal life style to enjoying the Thai delights. Food is served raw on the first night and we cook it ourselves on a metal stove contraption placed in front of us, the situation was laughable for us but hilarious for the locals watching us stumble our way from the thunderous rain lashing down to dumbfounded cave man confusion with dinning specialties, politeness wins and we are shown what is needed and we eat some of the best meat, shrimp, noodles and vegetables. Delicious.
Phuket
has its beaches crammed and the whole place just looks run down, leaving Koh Lanta was always going to be tough to beat as it was our first Thai paradise, but there is something seriously wrong with Phuket. It is like a mini Bangkok with no soul. We were trying to avoid the tourist hot spots and try to see more un-touched places on this trip but PHUKET WAKE PARK was calling. Two hours of painful crashing and holding on to a continuous pulley that took you to some of the fiercest obstacles yet to be mastered by my wakeboarding ability. Right from the start is was punishing and even after one hour it was more frustrating than enjoyable, a board change made all the difference and we were off, massive kickers, different height boxes, tube grinds, cut thumb and loads and loads of minging water intake. Thank the lord I got my vaccinations before coming on this trip! Haha
Chain Mai is on the horizon now and it will be a relief to be away from boiling heat at 0930 hrs or air conditioned money machines, walking around Phuket makes you dislike it even more. The
same can be found in Glasgow or Amsterdam, we are searching for the differential between normality and culture, we need to push out and try blend in with the locals, not to be on a beach surrounded by thousands of sun worshipers damaging their skin so they can show it off back home to friends and family. I think about how much people are missing by staying in this sunny Blackpool and wonder how long it will take to plague the southern islands with McDonalds and other western spoils that triggers greed and further disconnection from a beautiful country.
If you want to see gaunt looking hookers covered in dirt standing at the roadside looking for business at lunch time and beaches covered in posers, Phuket is the place for you. Check out this video to have a look at the streets of Phuket and make up your own mind:-
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