today's sex education lesson: dildos and vibrators

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Well, we might have solved some of my stomach problems. Turns out Sita was putting MSG in a lot of my food for flavor. Since the packaging is in Nepali and the stuff looks like salt, I thought that’s what it was. But every time I eat Chinese fast food at home with MSG I suffer the next day, so maybe that’s what’s been going on recently. I did have bacteria, according to the doctor, but perhaps the reason why I never feel completely normal is the damn MSG!

So we fixed that problem. Right now Sita is busy making me vegetable momos—I can’t wait! She went out this afternoon with 200 Rs and bought a ton of veggies, flour, and eggs to feed me until I go home. Earlier today she made me tofu and veggies with rice, which was also delicious. She told me that working for me is easy—only a small place to clean and a small amount of clothes to wash. The other days she cleans the Colonel’s house, which is big and covered in dog hair. So I joked with her (in Nepali) that today is an easy day for her. I’m so proud that I can carry on a conversation like that!

Mary and Ranju came over late this morning so Mary could use my hot water to shower (much to the dislike of Renuka, who kept saying they have hot water there). While she was in the shower, Ranju and Sita tried their first kiwi, which I bought at Bhat Bhateni yesterday. Ranju also ate 5 of the 6 little bananas I bought from my buddy that stands with a basket of them on his bike out on the road every afternoon. He yells at me every time I walk past, saying in Nepali, “Oranges! Bananas! So delicious! 1 kg you buy!” And then he charges me the “foreigner” price. But I think I make his day every time I do make a purchase. And people usually stand around to watch me try to haggle with him in Nepali.

Today I had a 2-hour Nepali lesson with Sushila, then I went to the print shop to print some articles I need to read for another phone interview on Tuesday (they actually gave me questions so I can prepare). I then went to the beauty shop to see Bindiya and Teena for threading and a pedicure. They tried to talk me into a bikini wax and facial as well, so that I look beautiful for Ken when I go home, but I declined. I honestly don’t know how they stay in business—I went at 3:30 and I was their first customer all day. In fact, I’ve only ever seen one other customer in there since I’ve been living here. I guess I’m keeping them in business for now.

Bindiya was paging through my articles on transnational feminism, trying to read the abstracts. Sitting there, I realized how lucky I am to have an American education. Even if you earn a PhD here in Nepal, or even a bachelor’s degree, the standards are so much lower that there is no comparison. Bindiya is considered well educated, and her English is very good. But she was still having a hard time even reading the titles of my articles. We also talked about how expensive it is here to go to school—she said parents have to pay about $200 per month for children to go to public school to cover fees, uniforms, etc.

She also finally admitted to having had sex before. Although I suspected it, she never said it to me until today. My conversations with Bindiya and Teena always include sex, since they find it fascinating that Americans often have sex with many people before marriage. I actually had a long conversation with Sushila today about sex as well, which started when she taught me the word for pubic hair (only because I asked what the word is for hair, and she explained that it depended on what kind). The conversation turned into me explaining all about dildos and vibrators, which I think she was nervously excited to hear about. So now I promised that as part of my sexual health program I am running when I get back, I am going to bring a dildo for my condom demonstration and a vibrator—just to show the women what American women often use to pleasure themselves.

I have a feeling Sushila is going to inherit the vibrator. She’s been celibate for years after leaving her abusive husband, but is very curious about women’s sexual pleasure. I also taught her the phrase BOB (battery-operated boyfriend), and told her how most single women I know own one. She wanted to know all about different varieties of dildos as well.

Hey, I’m doing my job as a cultural ambassador! These women know I study sex, so they end up asking all sorts of crazy questions.

There is a wedding going on in my neighborhood today. I was woken up this morning by the sounds of beating drums and awful sounding horns. The house is decorated with strings of lights and flowers, and when I came home this afternoon the band was sitting on the ground outside and people were up on the roof socializing. This is the start of wedding season—the auspicious months. Although this morning I saw a dog piss on one of the water urns decorated with tika and flowers that they have sitting outside the gates of their home. I’m guessing that’s not auspicious.

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