Autoyard Dave and the last of the Washoes

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Here is an adventure story as told by Autoyard Dave in Nevada...
It took a bit of coaxing to get the whole story out of him...
but here are part 1 and 2 for your enjoyment.


"Some people think that sweat lodges, peyote trips,
and sun dances are something out of an anthropology
textbook. But these things are real. I've seen sweat
tents, been to pow wows (where i saw the sacred
"chicken dance" among other things). And i've heard
about peyote using ceremonies.

Had a near death experience last week when two
unchained rottweilers came at me from behind a fence
on the Dresslerville reservation. I was doing
outreach informing community members about our
recycling program..

The two large dogs must have sniffed
out my cover and known my true mission. I ran over to the
suburban across the street, but the driver's side
faced the house with the dogs. I ran over to the
passenger side and opened the door, but stuff started
spilling out. They were barking and gnashing their teeth at me,
trying to tear my jeans off to get to my flesh.

Luckily i got some honey's in the Suburban
with me at all times. There's a couple of hot native
chicas and some model's from the local 7-11. As it turns
out, the dogs weren't innocent and neither was I.
The dogs were guarding the drug house of course and I was
there to break the whole thing up, brought together by
a secret coalition between my Taekwondo instructor's
and the Washoe elders.

The drugs going around were peyote, meth, and brake
fluid. So the dogs come barking and biting at me, I
gotta act quick so i grabbed a tire iron, started
twirling it around, and strategically smacked the dogs
in the mouth with it just as they were biting towards
my vitals.

The dealers came out of the house and started coming
towards me, knives and guns in hand. They said
"hippy-ki-yeah motherfucker", but i did a jump reverse
outer crescent kick, smackin one mofo in the mouth.
Then i busted un upset knifehand strike to the neck of
the other.

So after it was all over i took the girls back to
the autoyard, we got in the back of a white buick and
had an orgy. Afterwards we got some indian tacos."

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