Laos: The Land that Time Forgot. No dinosaurs, though. Or Doug McClure.

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From Cambodia, Dan and I took a speed boat to Laos which sounds exciting but, after sitting next to a noisy engine for an hour in a rather uncomfortable position, I was glad it was all over reasonably quickly. The rest of the speedboat crew contained two Danish guys, an English couple plus the token Aussie. For a short while we were stuck in international no-mans land as after the Cambodian border no-one who sold us the travel ticket had told us where we should head next. Eventually we worked out that we should walk 500 metres up the road to Laos where we had to bribe, sorry, pay various “official” charges, to get into the country. Once there we headed to Don Det, part of the 4000 Islands region on the mighty Mekong River.

Don Det was a quiet place with no electricity which basically meant that everyone started drinking once the sun went down as there was nothing else to do. People drank “Happy Shakes” and ate “Happy Pizzas”; basically lots of edible things sold had an added “happy” ingredient. Fine, if you like that kind of thing. This could explain why they never got round to putting electricity in as no-one was in a fit state to do so.

After Don Det we headed off to Pakse. Here Dan got food poisoning. I didn’t fancy that much so I went hiking on the Boloven Plataeu instead. I took in a Coffee plantation before visiting three waterfalls: one, I find, just isn’t satisfying enough.

Once Dan had recovered we then moved onto Vientiane: Laos’ capitol. Nice place but I can’t remember what we did there apart from visit the large temple in the centre of town. It was golden. Nope, that’s it. You’ve exhausted me of all my knowledge.

Vang Vieng is a tiny little village nestled amongst the mountains to which all the back-packers flock. The scenery is amazing (why I haven’t got any pictures of it is beyond me) but its notoriety comes from “Tubing”. “Tubing” involves being picked up in a small truck and taken 3 miles upstream from the town where you are then given a large innertube. The task is then to float back to civilization on the river's current. Only they’ve built various bars and swings’n’things on the river bank to delay you. We didn’t start this activity ‘til the early afternoon and after a few hours Dan lost his glasses after larking about. This put a bit of a dampener on the whole affair, especially as an extensive riverbed search (in which Dan found half a dozen sticks) left us delayed in getting back to town before sunset. In the dark, Dan and I became separated. Dan without his glasses is as blind as Velma from Scooby Doo which meant that he missed the “Get out here” sign. I didn’t, so I got out. I started shouting to him but heard no reply. I figured that, like a pet dog, he would eventually he find his way home so I trudged off back to town. Dan, on the other hand, was clinging to for dear life to a footbridge 200 metres downstream; the world a hazy, dark blur and him fearing that I had drowned. We laugh now but at the time I’m sure Dan suspected that he was going to have an episode of ‘999’ dedicated to him. He made it back. That’s the kind of guy he is.

Luang Prabang is a lovely little city that, up ‘til 1975 was the royal seat of power. It’s full of picturesque merchant shops and a great night market. Due to our hectic schedule we didn’t stay here for as long as we liked as we had to catch a 2-day riverboat to Thailand.

We caught a riverboat to Thailand. It took two days.

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Photos

Mooooo!
Don Det, 4000 Islands

Khone Pha Pheng waterfalls
Don Det

The view from our bungalow
Dan and I often sat back in our hammock (not together) admiring the scenery until a chubby Belgian broke it. I say Belgian; he was actually Swiss. I knew it was one of those countries with good chocolate: probably why he was overweight. He didn't ask to use it either. I'm not bitter, of course. Though I would say the episode ruined the entire trip.It was a great hammock.

Happy Coffee lady
Nothing puts you in a good mood like monotonous, back breaking labour. The Boloven Plateau.

Waterfall
The Boloven Plateau.

Waterfall 2
The Boloven Plateau.

That Luang
Vientiane

Tubing, Vang Vieng
People launching themselves into the river. Alcohol was involved.

Action Dan (2)
This pale blur is Dan just about to land in the water; though to me it also looks like Dan emerging from the water just like a dolphin.

Tubing
Dan "relaxed", just before he loses his glasses in a fit of tomfoolery. He tried standing on his tube in a bid to impress me. It didn't.

Scaramouche, scaramouche, will you do the fandango!
Dan's T-shirts have caused much mirth on this trip. From a wardrobe of about 7 he has lost several due to massive shrinkage/expanding after various South East Asian Laundry experiences. This one had to go after I told him he looked like a Roadie. I think it was the beard.

Mekong
On the riverboat to Thailand