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Published: December 4th 2007
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The 4 hour minivan ride alongside 11 other tourists was a wriggly drive way up and into the sunny Lao mountains. It was cramped and uncomfortable but the views across the valleys and peaks were very dramatic and brilliantly emerald green. As we decended down the other side into central Laos, the van's breaking was really struggling with the steep and sharp hairpin curves and my fellow passengers and I started to get nervous as the smell of burning brake discs filled the van as the driver resorted to tactical hand-break-assisted 'control'. Seriously, we did not want to leave the road here - I'd rather take my chances on driving off the side of the 'Rest and Be Thankfull' road near Arrochar in the Scottish Highlands at 100mph than go head first into this mountainous abyss...
About an hour from our destination of Vang Vieng, we thankfully stopped in a little town for some noodle soup and a quick toilet brake. While standing there in the gents whistling away while nature took its course, I stupidly took a look around the rafters of this decrepit old outhouse of a can and I wish I hadnt because the jolly Team Laos Pile Up
From the top: Lorah, Mel, Jo & Keelyann whistling of "Caledonia", by Frankie Millar pettered out to an alarming exclamation of 'Bloody Hell!!'. To my right was the biggest spider Ive seen on the trip, even bigger than the brute of an arachnid I spotted suspended in a web between two trees while on the dumbo ride in Luang Prabang. Forgive my manners for neglecting to wash my hands, but i was out of that kamode in a shot, nervously brushing figments of my imagination from my hair and shoulders as I made my way back to the relative safety of the van.
So we rocked into Vang Vieng and I decided to go and look for a guesthouse recommended by Katelyn from Ha Long Bay. The place was aptly named Otherside as it was on the quiet, opposite side of the river that runs through Vang Vieng. So I crossed over on a fairly sturdy looking bridge in search of this place. It wasnt easy to find it though and I had to walk through fields and trepidly walk over extremely rickity looking bridges that I would have sweated over even without carrying 25kg of extra bulk with my backpacks. I finally made it over in
vain and was told it was full so after trying another couple of places I was offered the last room available in a guesthouse going for $3 a night - sold!
That evening I was at a bit of a loose end and after spending a lonely hour in the company of my book in a sleepy bar. I decided to go and find out what was happening in Vang Vieng. From my stop off at the hotel, I could hear distant loud music from the other side of the river so I went off on a hunt to follow the beats. Again, I picked 'the wrong bridge' over the river and had to pick my way through the dark to Smile Bar. I eventually made it, settled down by the roaring open air log fire in the bar and got chatting to a couple of really friendly girls from England. It was a great laugh that night and the next day, I was happy to become an honorary member of "Team Laos" for the day and join them for Tubing on the river. Thankfully, everyone was pretty hungover that morning but the anticipation of tubing (the whole reason
I'd come to Vang Vieng) drove us through our groggy mists!
Tubing is a simple concept and im amazed I've never seen it in other places. Once our tuk tuk dropped us by the river, we were each given a giant, inflated rubber ring, a bit like the inside tubing of a large wheel. Basically, you throw this in the water and plunk your touche in the middle and drift down the river. Thats just the start of it. After about 100m of 'tubing', we reached a wooden bar on stilts by the river playing loud techno music and we were thrown a line by the bar staff and hauled ashore for our first beer of the day at 11am. In an effort to kick the hangover well into touch and re-engage my new buddies in some sort of acceptable level of social interaction, I decided to take a shot on the ariel slide that rattles down a high zip wire above the water before letting go to fall into the river.
With that, I decided to try each rope swing or ariel slide at each bar and attain the Vang Vieng Gland Slam. After another few bars,
a few more beers, a couple of shots of insane Lau Lau whisky, I did my last swing (quite a biggy), ending with a loud back slapping "Smack" on the water, much to the "Ow's" and the "Ah's" of the watching hordes from the bar. My back was fine but id practically lost a toe-nail - ouch! So no more daredeveling for me that day. By the time we finished at the last bar, it was getting dark and the water in the river was running cold. After a mission of taking a taxi boat (that had to be bailed of water by the driver) and subsequently a tuk tuk with one of the English girls, we made it back to town for dinner with the rest of Team Laos. What a day!
On the other nights in Vang Vieng, I caught up with Luke and Carmen, who I'd originally net in Hue, Vietnam and had then met again in Hanoi. It was great to catch back up with them and hear what we'd each been up to since we'd last met up. On the last evening, after collectively vowing together to have no more than 3 beers each
in "Oooh La La Bar", I entered the "Killer Pool" competition, up against 20 or so other backpackers competing for the first prize of a crate of large Beer Lao's and a fetching Beer Lau muscle top. As sod's law has it, the one night you can do without free beer is the night you win a crate of the stuff, which I went on to do, thanks to the 'Go On Steve!' and 'Yeahing!' from Carmen and Luke cheering me on. After skimming a few beers from the crate for us, we decided to hold firm on our agreement of a comparitively early night so I did the rounds of the tables and handed out free beer which went down well with the Ooh Lah Lah punters and Killer Pool commiserators.
After 4 crazy nights in Vang Vieng, I waited for my minibus to Vientiane by taking in one of the restaurants in town that repeatedly play 'Family Guy' or 'Friends' for the tourists, who laze around on the pillowed floor couches waiting for the excesses of Tubing to abate. When my minivan arrived, I just wasnt ready to leave Vang Vieng and would have much rathered spend
another week or two there meeting people and having fun and I concluded that this town would be the perfect place to while a whole summer away.
Alas, it was time to move on, to Vientiane, the capital of Laos, and see what was happening in repudedly the "most relaxed capital city of the World" according to Lonely Planet. After the fun times of Vang Vieng, I was looking to retreat to quietness for a few days so with a bit of luck, thats just what will happen... ; )
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