A Well Tramped Taj

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Thursday 3-17
We woke up in Agra to a delicious breakfast of parantha w/ yogurt curd (yum!) and realized that my Kindle was irreparably broken even though it had just been sitting in a closet for a few days after we’d used it without a problem. Ugh, we are not having much luck with the Kindles on this trip. Oh well, good thing Nick got a replacement for his! Since we only had the afternoon in Agra, we hired a car & driver for the day to take us to all the sights. First, we headed out to see the sunrise over the famous Taj Mahal. When we got to the ticket booth, rather than waiting in line with the rest of the white tourists, an Indian suggested that Allen get in the “Indian line” and get the cheap tickets without having to wait. He paid about 1/5th what the rest of us had to pay – at least he was able to use his Indian heritage to some advantage on this trip ;o) Too bad he couldn’t help Amy who paid for her ticket and then had to defend herself when the ticket taker asked her to pay twice; even though he had just taken her money, he demanded that she pay more. Never a dull moment. We then entered the lines to get into the Taj – one for boys and one for girls. Seems like almost everything is separated by sex here in India. Fortunately for me and Amy, the girl’s line (which was much longer than the boy’s) went a lot faster – now why can’t that happen with lines to the restroom?!

The Taj Mahal was indeed beautiful; much smaller than I expected it to be from pictures. The morning light and the reflection of the Taj in the garden pool was stunning, though. Since the Taj and surrounding mosques are holy places, we were all given hospital booties to wear over our shoes upon entering. Trent ended up wearing his for the entire day to our great amusement. Though I’m not sure how effective they were by the afternoon when they were worn down to nothing but shreds of cloth hanging from an elastic anklet. We learned at the Sulabh toilet museum that the Taj Mahal urinal was rated the second most interesting urinal in the entire world, so Nick was determined to check it out and see what was so “interesting”about it.

When we got to Agra Fort, we were thronged by some really pushy tour guides, so we used Allen as our shield to run the gauntlet of tour guides. Upon entering, I once again stood out like a sore thumb and had a couple ask me to take a photo with them, but this time, they wanted to wear my sunglasses in the photo. I guess my Kaenons must be a novelty of their own. The fort itself was pretty cool – beautiful open air palace rooms with stunning views of the Taj Mahal across the river. Shah Jahan (who originally built the fort & the Taj Mahal) was imprisoned here when his son, Aurangzeb, initiated a coup d’état and took over as emperor; quite honestly, not a bad place to be in jail! We had a huge laugh when Nick, waited while some people took photos of themselves with the Taj Mahal in the background and then stepped in to take a shot (without people) as he did a tour guide started to pose a big group of people to take their photo, and immediately started to yell out to Nick “Hello, Sir. Hello. HELLO,” over and over again, rather irritatingly, to get Nick to move so he could take a photo of his group. Nick of course, in true Nick fashion refused to move until he had his shot, replying, “I can HEAR YOU. Your picture is not more important than my picture.” This was to our great amusement after which, for you “Seinfeld” fans, the rest of the trip was filled with never ending Uncle Leo jokes. Indian tour group souvenir photos, by the way, pretty hysterical. Everyone stands in front of the monument with stone faces, no smiling and no emotion. It’s almost like a soccer team photo. Except for one guy, who was lounging on a pedestal like he was posting for a Playgirl calendar. So of course, we all had to take our share of “Indian souvenir” photos ;o)

Our next stop was the “Baby Taj” or Itmad-ud-Daula's Tomb, which looks similar in layout to the real Taj. We found a shady spot in the unbearable heat (!) and watched some water buffalo dive into the river to try and cool themselves off; we kind of wished we could join them. Nick, who for some odd reason has quite a talent at speaking cow, mooed to the buffalo and got them to look up at us with very amusing expressions. The best part was when a grounds keeper came over to us looking for the cow that made the sound.

For our last stops, the driver took us to a random park, where all the trees had been chopped down so you could see the Taj Mahal across the river, kind of sad, and of course the required commission restaurant & souvenir store. We discovered in India that the more stops (cafes and shops) your driver takes you to, the more commission money he gets to pocket, whether you want to go to these places or not. So we had quite a time trying to convince him that we didn’t want to see anymore souvenir stores. But the scheme wasn’t over. He also tried to get us to pay for gas (a cost that is included in his daily fee) and pretended to pump gas while asking us for the money. Amy caught that one right away. But he still wasn’t done! As mentioned, it was a damned hot day and when we asked him to turn on the a/c in the car, he took that as an opportunity to try and charge us more – just to run the a/c! So again, we had to try and convince him that no, he could just roll down the windows instead. I don’t think he was too pleased with us that day. His loss.

That evening, we hopped a train to Jaipur. It was only supposed to take a few hours and get us there before 10pm, so we booked chairs instead of bunks. If only we had known! As we found out the following day, there was a Jat protest and people were sitting on the tracks, halting all trains around Jaipur. Just our luck! It turned out to be a very long and painful train ride; we didn’t get in until after 2am. Everyone kind of took turns dozing off. Nick and Trent became so delirious with sleep that they couldn’t stop giggling.

We woke up in Agra to a delicious breakfast of parantha w/ yogurt curd (yum!) and realized that my Kindle was irreparably broken even though it had just been sitting in a closet for a few days after we’d used it without a problem. Ugh, we are not having much luck with the Kindles on this trip. Oh well, good thing Nick got a replacement for his! Since we only had the afternoon in Agra, we hired a car & driver for the day to take us to all the sights. First, we headed out to see the sunrise over the famous Taj Mahal. When we got to the ticket booth, rather than waiting in line with the rest of the white tourists, an Indian suggested that Allen get in the “Indian line” and get the cheap tickets without having to wait. He paid about 1/5th what the rest of us had to pay – at least he was able to use his Indian heritage to some advantage on this trip ;o) Too bad he couldn’t help Amy who paid for her ticket and then had to defend herself when the ticket taker asked her to pay twice; even though he had just taken her money, he demanded that she pay more. Never a dull moment. We then entered the lines to get into the Taj – one for boys and one for girls. Seems like almost everything is separated by sex here in India. Fortunately for me and Amy, the girl’s line (which was much longer than the boy’s) went a lot faster – now why can’t that happen with lines to the restroom?!

The Taj Mahal was indeed beautiful; much smaller than I expected it to be from pictures. The morning light and the reflection of the Taj in the garden pool was stunning, though. Since the Taj and surrounding mosques are holy places, we were all given hospital booties to wear over our shoes upon entering. Trent ended up wearing his for the entire day to our great amusement. Though I’m not sure how effective they were by the afternoon when they were worn down to nothing but shreds of cloth hanging from an elastic anklet. We learned at the Sulabh toilet museum that the Taj Mahal urinal was rated the second most interesting urinal in the entire world, so Nick was determined to check it out and see what was so “interesting”about it. [Nick Note: I did find the urinals at the Taj Mahal and I was looking forward to this ever since I learned about them in Delhi. However it was a HUGE let down; they were basically just normal white, ceramic urinals in a room that looked like a normal bathroom. Yes at the Taj Mahal, but really no more amazing than a normal urinal at some other great heritage site. I don’t know what made them particularly interesting. Here is a pic if you want to know what they look like http://www.urinal.net/taj_mahal/]

When we got to Agra Fort, we were thronged by some really pushy tour guides, so we used Allen as our shield to run the gauntlet of tour guides. Upon entering, I once again stood out like a sore thumb and had a couple ask me to take a photo with them, but this time, they wanted to wear my sunglasses in the photo. I guess my Kaenons must be a novelty of their own. The fort itself was pretty cool – beautiful open air palace rooms with stunning views of the Taj Mahal across the river. Shah Jahan (who originally built the fort & the Taj Mahal) was imprisoned here when his son, Aurangzeb, initiated a coup d’état and took over as emperor; quite honestly, not a bad place to be in jail! We had a huge laugh when Nick, waited while some people took photos of themselves with the Taj Mahal in the background and then stepped in to take a shot (without people) as he did a tour guide started to pose a big group of people to take their photo, and immediately started to yell out to Nick “Hello, Sir. Hello. HELLO,” over and over again, rather irritatingly, to get Nick to move so he could take a photo of his group. Nick of course, in true Nick fashion refused to move until he had his shot, replying, “I can HEAR YOU. Your picture is not more important than my picture.” This was to our great amusement after which, for you “Seinfeld” fans, the rest of the trip was filled with never ending Uncle Leo jokes. Indian tour group souvenir photos, by the way, pretty hysterical. Everyone stands in front of the monument with stone faces, no smiling and no emotion. It’s almost like a soccer team photo. Except for one guy, who was lounging on a pedestal like he was posting for a Playgirl calendar. So of course, we all had to take our share of “Indian souvenir” photos ;o)

Our next stop was the “Baby Taj” or Itmad-ud-Daula's Tomb, which looks similar in layout to the real Taj. We found a shady spot in the unbearable heat (!) and watched some water buffalo dive into the river to try and cool themselves off; we kind of wished we could join them. Nick, who for some odd reason has quite a talent at speaking cow, mooed to the buffalo and got them to look up at us with very amusing expressions. The best part was when a grounds keeper came over to us looking for the cow that made the sound. [Nick Note: What can I say it is a gift. Actually it comes from lots of practice as a child when I would go visit my uncle’s milk farms. As the cows were being milked I would amuse myself by mooing and seeing if I could get all the cows responding to me at once. Obviously, this required a certain amount of bovine vocalization realism. It seems to be like riding a bicycle since I seem to be able to speak to Holy Indian Cows.]

For our last stops, the driver took us to a random park, where all the trees had been chopped down so you could see the Taj Mahal across the river, kind of sad, and of course the required commission restaurant & souvenir store. We discovered in India that the more stops (cafes and shops) your driver takes you to, the more commission money he gets to pocket, whether you want to go to these places or not. So we had quite a time trying to convince him that we didn’t want to see anymore souvenir stores. But the scheme wasn’t over. He also tried to get us to pay for gas (a cost that is included in his daily fee) and pretended to pump gas while asking us for the money. Amy caught that one right away. But he still wasn’t done! As mentioned, it was a damned hot day and when we asked him to turn on the a/c in the car, he took that as an opportunity to try and charge us more – just to run the a/c! So again, we had to try and convince him that no, he could just roll down the windows instead. I don’t think he was too pleased with us that day. His loss.

That evening, we hopped a train to Jaipur. It was only supposed to take a few hours and get us there before 10pm, so we booked chairs instead of bunks. If only we had known! As we found out the following day, there was a Jat protest and people were sitting on the tracks, halting all trains around Jaipur. Just our luck! It turned out to be a very long and painful train ride; we didn’t get in until after 2am. Everyone kind of took turns dozing off. Nick and Trent became so delirious with sleep that they couldn’t stop giggling. [Nick Note: The train tickets for 5 people are in one sheet so when the conductor came by I gave him the sheet and he looked down at me, counting 1 through 4, while pointing at me and the 3 lily white photo celebrities (Trent, Cat and Amy) and then gave me a shrug like “where is the 5th person?” I pointed to Allen and his response was “what that guy?” – like he couldn’t believe that we had a token Indian guy with us. Right away, I say “yes, him” and in our tired state, Trent and I thought it was hilarious, in a reverse racism kinda way since the conductor was obviously Indian as well.]

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