Back by popular demand...

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Are you ready for another crazy adventure from the happy wanderers!
We left the sunny shores of Australia after spending a week in the red light district of Sydney. To be fair it was a fantastic place and reminded us a lot of home. It had happy hours and a fantastic climate, everyday was a warm sunny day...then rain...then more sun, suppose thats not like home at all! The first day we got there it was a sweltering 37 degrees, flight socks weren't worn long that day I can tell you! The people in Sydney are certainly nicer than those in Brisbane. Oh yeah don't think we said about dropping off the campervan in Cairns, well to be fair it all went well, after we had cleaned it it was certainly cleaner than when we got it! Think we saw the owner Christian, but not to talk to. I was ready for him if he was going to start with his 'you should have paid more money' crap. Lisa was more than ready coz she had her sleeves rolled up and gum shield in place! So we got on this big plane and it takes off from Sydney and it lands some 7 1/2 hours later in Changi in Singapore. On board you have to fill in an immigration form, nothing new there however it says on the front of the form in big letters...DEATH TO ALL DRUG TRAFFICERS thats when your bum starts to pinch and you start thinking 'did we leave our bags anywhere?!' After getting our bags which were literally the last off the plane we had to scan them through the machine. All was going well until we get asked if we're carrying any metal. It was Lisa's bag so she had to open it up and produced some eyebrow tweezers, customs didn't look too impressed with this and mentioned something like a tin opener at which point I gallantly came to her rescue as it was my bag that had both a tin opener and a corkscrew in it! I don't think I've ever seen customs people relieved to find the answers to the mysterious metal objects. They even had a smile on their face once they realised what it was! Who says customs don't have a sense of humour?! If any customs people read this I think you do a great job and should keep up the good work in this very challenging and difficult time. Thats our entry back into the UK sorted! We got ourselves onto a free shuttle to take us to our hotel and unfortunately for us they had ran out of superior rooms so we had to settle for an executive one instead. God damn that bed was huge! Needed a phone to speak to Lisa coz she was so far away!
The next day is our travells to Mumbai, now having a very vast knowledge about the culture and way of life in Mumbai...not, we opted for an airport hotel option as we were spending one night before going off to Goa in the morning. We booked ourselves a hotel just 2 minutes from the airport. We didn't have any Indian rupees with us and had to exchange some US dollars (thanks Dad B!) At the time the air hostesses had got off the plane and stood congregating oputside the row of kiosks where you can exchange your cash. It was a culture shock as when we walked past them the first time they were shouting trying to get our business, it wasn't until we had walked past them that we thought we had best get some money! So we turned around and went back to change some cash, by this time every bloke in his kiosk, and there must have been a good half dozen of these, were transfixed staring at the hostesses. It wasn't until we walked past the first bloke holding our dollars did their minds suddenly go back to the job in hand and the shouting commenced once more, followed by a sharp turn of heads. Armed with cash we set about getting a taxi, despite it only being 2 minutes away but we didn't know in which directions, and it was now midnight. Our plane had been held up in an air traffic jam to get parked so we only waited about an hour or so to disembark. We went to a taxi office and got a pre-paid taxi as recommended by everyone. Armed with our slip of paper and the only advice being"a man will be waiting for you outside with this number". We exited the airport and proceeded to what can only be described as a square with hundreds of people stood behind barriers asking for our business. Stood fast with our taxi slip and with no idea where the taxis were, we asked a security bloke and he pointed to a number one sign and said "its over there". We were met by a swarm of people asking for the number on the slip, now bearing in mind the advice we were given was that a bloke would have this number which is on the slip on display, as a result we weren't giving anything away. Eventually we found our taxi and made our way out of the airport. Our 2 minute journey ended up being more like 20 minutes, as our hotel is just 2 minutes from the domestic airport, not the international as we had thought. Oh but it gets better, at the airport gates the taxi driver man pulls up and gets out. Horror stories, I'm sure have been based on this scenario...its dark at night, strangers arrive looking tired and obviously at the complete mercy of their taxi driver to get them safely to their destination...when suddenly there's a face at the window...AHHHHHHHHH! All is true apart from the face bit... the guy had no idea where he was going so he asked for directions, shortly afterwards we were on our way. He pipes up a few minutes later with "you give me 150 rupees" in our most polite English accent we said we had already paid, his respond was yes but you give me 150 rupees. This conversation went back and forth numerous times before he lowered his price to 50! Ever the business man I seized the opportunity and offered him 10 if he got us there safely. It suddenly became apparent through our conversation that this bloke still had no idea where he was going and there could be a possibility that we may end up in some ghetto and may have all our worldly belongings stolen or worse! He tried a second time to get out of the taxi to 'supposedly' ask for directions but not that impressed with his honestly, bearing in mind we'd paid up front for our taxi and on the slip it said do not pay the driver any extra, we made him sit in his seat to get directions. He asked his elderly gentleman the way who then asked us where we were from and he too gave us directions and wished us a pleasant stay in India. So far it wasn't waht you would call a pleasureable experience at all! Once at our hotel we paid the driver his 10 rupees as deviously, illegally negotiated, placed it gracefully in his hand with a smile, a grand total of about 8 pence...its the principal that counts here! Once in our room the time now being about 1am, bearing in mind that we landed 3 hours ago, we tried to get to sleep only to be disturbed by our own toilet which liked to flush itself every 5 minutes! Door shut...now sleep!

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