Choice in my Life

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A few days ago at lunch, Harry asked us what time we'd be back at school from Chinese class. Class is in downtown Futian from 3-4:30, and we've been staying lately to have dinner with friends before heading back. It seemed like the natural start to a question of asking us to be somewhere, so we said “Not sure...we can maybe come back right after class...why?” (Note: Maybe is the favorite word of Chinese people. Maybe you will come teach an extra class tomorrow? Maybe you will do this for me? When we come back to the states, we're going to find ourselves saying 'maybe' all the time!) It turned out that our school was holding the first round of English speech contests and they were hoping we could be judges. So, being the dedicated teachers that we are, we hurried back from Chinese class and ate a quick dinner of pb&j sandwishes.

As a side note, I'll have you know, it's no easy feat to get back from class either. Our school is required to provide transportation both ways, but because they have a limited amount of drivers who also need to be able to take teachers home at 5:30, they can't come back to get us. At first it was a pain because they always tried to get us to catch a ride with the 6 other foreign teachers that live in downtown Bao'an. However, we quickly realized that 1) those teachers are slackers and hardly ever go to Chinese class and 2) we're then dropped off somewhere in Bao'an and have to figure out a city bus to get us out to the airport. So, the school just reimburses us for the cost of transportation back. We take an easy, comfortable Airport express bus directly back to the airport, which takes about 40 minutes, and then a city bus the whole two stops back to our place. Then it's just a short 10-15 min walk down our sketchy road. 😊 It's a pretty nice system now as it allows us to stay in the city for dinner and we just have to make sure we catch the last bus back by 9pm.

Students had to prepare 3 minute speeches on the topic “Choice in my Life”. There were 35 contestants last night, and we had to judge them, picking the top 10. There will be one more contest at our school and then the top 3 will go onto compete against other students in the district. It was cute to hear not only the mistakes they made (I choosed) but to hear the English sayings they chose to incorporate in their speech. We heard “put up or shut up”, “no pain no gain”, and “life is like a box of chocolates”...I really wished they'd used a Forrest Gump accent too. The speeches made me think of my Dad, primarily because a few of them talked about Robert Frost's poem, “The Road Not Taken”, my dad's mantra for life.

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
 
Then took the other, as just as fair
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that, the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
two roads diverged in a wood, and I --
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

Some of the speeches made me sad, and gave me a new appreciation for what some of our students have gone through. Many of them talked about their choice to stay in Shenzhen even though their parents had to move away, or their choice to leave living with their grandparents whom they loved to come to Shenzhen and live with their parents, in order to receive a 'better' education. Our cultures are so different, something I'm reminded of daily here. Their lives are focused on becoming the best, the perfect version of whatever they're striving for. Creativity is not as emphasized. They must work as hard as they can to pass the college entrance exams, or their dreams are forever lost. I am thankful more and more every day for the opportunities I have been given in life. The most important part of hearing the speeches? Even though their lives are different and may be full of less choice than my own, they're not any less happy.

I'm glad Martin and I are taking the road less traveled for this year of our lives...it's teaching us a lot.

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Comments

[Mom/MD]

Road Less Traveled
You will never look back and regret taking that "road less traveled". Some of us take it early on, some do it later, while others sit on the sidelines thinking "what if" or "if only". Glad you two took it early in your marriage...and who knows...you may discover that it will be the road you'll want to stay on! For those of us far away, we hope not...at least not the road that is so far away from all of us! Choices in life come hard for us all...and as you are becoming aware of, the children there must make some of their most important choices at a much younger age than we'd ever think of here in the States. What a wonderful revelation to you to realize that they are no less happy regardless of what choices are available to them! What a wonderful opportunity for all of us to be able to share your time there...and all that you are learning and seeing!

[Elyse]

SO TRUE
Our lives are much different this year than we could have every imagined. Pete and I are thankful you 2 both came to China otherwise we would have never met such a great couple.