The very, very, very, very, very,very,very,very slow boat to Battambang

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What a story, begins yesterday in Siem Reap:

2 English Lads:Hi Mr Guesthouse owner we want to go somewhere interesting?
Mr GHO: Ah my friends, you go to Battambang!
2 English Lads:Ok, good yes?
Mr GHO:Very good my friends, you want bus or boat?
2 English Lads: How long for each?
Mr GHO:Bus 3 hour, boat 4 hour, Bus $6, Boat $7
2 English Lads:Boat only 4 hour?OK you sell us ticket for tomorrow?
Mr GHO: No problem my friends, you go tomorrow at 6 am ok?
2 English Lads:ERRRRRRRR ? 6 am? OK we suppose so as only 4 hours travelling!
2 English Lads think: yeah get to Battambang straight to sleep for a good kip!
We get the tickets , look at the boat on the ticket and think hmmm that looks comfy-good for sleeping!!!

Yeah right.

And so the most amazing journey of my travels in Asia begins.

We finally get picked up at 6.45 am( bas%&@#s!!) and thrown into a 12 seater minibus with approximately 22 other tired and weary travellers.
There may have been more, but thanks to a constant bombbardment by the local mosquitos there were so many hands and feet flailing it was difficult to tell.

We arrive at the fishy smelling Siem Reap pier ( i use the term pier very lightly)20 minutes later, and we all consume a hearty breakfast of bread and water supplied by the viscious women at the muddy bank that is Siem Reap pier.

We board the boat with the loudest sounding jet fighter plane engine( with a speed of 0.1 knots per hour) , we arrive in Battambang 9 1/2 hours later.

Due mainly to the 5 breakdowns, incuding 1 where the steering rack ( piece of string that attatches wheel to rudder), 3 running agrounds and an interesting problem of getting very tightly wedged between a house boat and a bamboo transporter.
Oh , and also thanks to the Cambodian woman who got us to stop for 30 minutes so she could buy some runner beans and have a gossip with her old friend.

To be honest it was bloody brilliant!!!!

Some times you can do nothing but sit back, have a sip of water, wipe the sweat off your brow, face, arms, legs, hands and neck before you drip on the hairy german girl next to you and do nothing.

Today we did get to see the other side to Cambodia.
The thousands upon thousands of people on the poverty line living, drinking, fishing, defecating and washing on the river banks of Tonle Sap.
As usual the local children were out in force , getting us to wave at every opportunity and all the fisherman were giving our boat driver a very stern look as we had probably just spoiled their chances of getting anything to eat tonight.
I never , ever, could imagine living the way they do and it really makes you think about home and what we have.
Was absoloutely gutted as the batteries in my camera gave up the ghost after only 7/8 photos and you cant really explain what we saw today in words.

So all in all, the worst and the best journey yet.
We are now in The Royal Hotel in Battambang after just suddenly realising we are right slap bang in the middle of one of the biggest dinner,dance and really crap live music street party nights of the year here.
We have no chance of any sleep tonight as the girl in the internet cafe said to us:Big party for dead people!!!
Believe me, this music could raise the dead as they wouldnt want to listen to this bilge and would probably raise and get the hell out of here.
There is nothing to see here(thanks Mr Guesthouse Owner)---ps. revenge is sweet as we have the only 2 keys for room 106 with us because you got us up early this morning and we werent fully functional!
Tomorrow Steve is off to Bangkok and i havent got a clue where i am going!

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