A Birthday in Nigeria

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Wednesday
June 13

We're sitting between the borders of Benin and Nigeria and I'm up in the front with the Pastor (more in a minute!) when the truck jumps forward. Looking through the left side mirrors, I see we've been clipped by another truck who doesn't even stop and acknowledge it! This is coming after Benin officials accused us of having fake passports! Good morning!

We were giving Pastor Emmanuel a lift into Nigeria as he'd delayed his departure to make sure Cecilia had her visa. Conversation was stilted at first but slowly warmed up as he told us a bit about himself. We'd been close to one border but were advised not to cross there and so we were heading a little further north to another crossing. Upon arrival at the border (a rope separated the two countries), Suse parked the truck and she and the Pastor made their way to the Benin officials seated at a desk. I watched from the front seat as they flicked through our passports and then the look of surprise on Suse's face. Returning to the truck she filled me in before driving past them and parking fifty metres up the road so we could clear Nigerian immigration. Efficient and much more pleasant, we used up the last of our money in the small stalls nearby and headed further into the country.

We'd already been warned that we'd have to stop constantly for checkpoints but even then weren't prepared to stop a total of eight times within approximately two miles! Each wanted a passenger list which were handed out like souvenirs and all were friendly and happy to meet us.

Shouting out the window to staff at petrol stations, it took a few miles to find one that had diesel and could fill our tanks. Despite the amount of petrol the country has, it can be difficult to find, especially diesel, as it is hoarded away. Counting all the naira we had, I watched the numbers climb as we filled up almost 1000 litres. People wandered off to grab food for lunch and on we went.

A buzzer connected between the back and the cabin lets Suse know if someone needs to go to the bathroom. The buzzer sounding, we drove on a short distance until we could safely pull over and Suse let everyone off. I was chatting with the Pastor when a car pulled up in front of us and two guys jumped out, the car then taking off again. The men came to the Pastor's side (which is where the driver would be if the truck wasn't English) and although they spoke English, it was heavily accented and almost impossible to understand but the tone of voice told me they weren't happy. When one climbed up onto the truck, I lent across and locked the door, the men seeming to notice me for the first time. Then whilst trying to get myself back to my seat, I saw the other man moving around towards Suse's door and needed to lock that one also. Just in time I managed to lock it as he pulled on the door several times before disappearing towards the back of the truck. I later learnt he tried to block people from getting on the truck but with everyone safely back on, I watched as Suse came up the side and I let her in. The men wanted money and the Pastor began shouting at them to get off the truck as Suse started pulling away.
Our truck isn't made for quick getaways and it wasn't long before a silver car veered in front of us with the two men in it. At the next town they jumped out and stood in front of us, blocking our path. Chaos ensured as the Pastor shouted at them, I shouted at the Pastor to not unlock the door or wind down the window and Suse sat on the horn to draw attention to us which worked as within minutes, police turned up and cleared our path. One gave us his contact details so if we had any other hassle, we could call him and we moved slowly through the crowds.

The pastor accompanied us to Abeokuta where recent rains hampered our efforts to get into the golf course where we were camping. The wheels spun in the red mud and other cars slid sideways, hands on steering wheels frantically trying to keep control. We reversed away from the entrance and attempted a different approach, successfully making it up the tree-lined hill to the club house and parking the truck in front of bemused members. Tumbling off the truck, we bid farewell to the pastor until the following day when he would organise a minibus to take us to Lagos. Tents were set up and the impromptu pre-birthday drinks began.

After we'd bought wine and beer from the club house, the manager came out and introduced himself, buying us another bottle of wine. Cecilia gave me my first present: a pair of glow in the dark glasses which were worn most of the night, as were the two other pairs. The photos are hilarious and I had a brilliant night before heading to bed in anticipation of the trip to Lagos in the morning.
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Thursday
June 14

It's my birthday! The Pastor arrived with a minibus at 9am and we piled in for what we thought would be an hour and a half journey. Traffic was a steady stream and yet the driver seemed determined to get us there in record time. By the time we reached the outskirts of the city and stopped for petrol and to stretch our legs, I was feeling nauseous from the drive and fumes. The amount of people was amazing and yet we weren't even in the midst of the busiest areas! It's mind-boggling to think that a city can have almost a third of Australia's entire population at around eight million people (Australia's sitting at over 22 million) without even getting into the size of our two countries!
Anyway. We edged our way through traffic, our driver doing an excellent job of squeezing into spaces that weren't really there and out of the smog from across the bridge, buildings started to appear.
We were squished in that minibus a long, long time. Getting caught in traffic that was six or so lanes wide and waiting to go through a toll point, only to do a U-turn and go back was unbelievably frustrating and then, the heavens opened. I thought I'd seen torrential rain before but this was like standing under a waterfall. It was decided that we'd stop for lunch and even though it was only a hop, step and jump from the van, we were saturated in seconds. The air conditioned chain restaurant wasn't what any of us had in mind but, beggars can't be choosers and no one was volunteering to go hunting for something else.
Driving on with at least semi-filled stomachs, it was starting to become apparent that the Pastor hadn't listened to anything Suse or we had said. With Nico up front, we had him tell the driver directly where we wanted to go and without too much fuss, eventually pulled into a parking space. Well. The women who were selling their wares to my right were instantly upon the minibus, laughing and singing and carrying on and tried to open the door for us. Once I was out, I was engulfed in a giant hug and bounced around - and that was before they knew it was my birthday! With only an hour, Suse and I wandered off to check out the colonial courthouse (which must've been renovated because it was looking decidedly un-colonial) and the mosque and with fresh steamed corn in our hands, made our way back to the group.
All had assumed that we'd only spent an hour there because we'd stop somewhere else. Even when Pastor Emmanuel told us we would visit his house and church, we figured it was close by. Frustration soon gave way to anger as we saw ourselves getting further and further away from the hustle and bustle we'd come to see. Sitting in his living room, I began looking for restaurants for dinner, not wanting everyone to spend longer at his house than in town and eventually it was decided that we wouldn't return to Lagos but head towards Abeokuta. I was bummed. I'd had a very different day planned in my head and felt bad that everyone had spent almost the entire day squashed into a van. At the same time, they felt bad for me and were happy to travel the distance back into town for a meal but the driver made the decision for us. Having requested someone to pick us up at 9am, drop us in town and return for us at 10pm, it wasn't looking anything like that. It also transpired that the pastor had neglected to tell the driver it would be any more than three or four hours and if went to Lagos for dinner, he would need to drive us to the golf club and then go all the way back to Lagos to get home. It wasn't fair. Firmly refusing the pastor's attempt to continue with us, we left. When we stopped for petrol and drinks I bought the driver a can of Coke and apologised, telling him none of us had known. He understood and was grateful for the drink and explanation and we sang and drank all the way.
Finding a restaurant was our last hurdle. But after a few false starts, a lovely man drove ahead of us, motioning for Suse to follow him and took us to a restaurant that seated us out by the pool. And then told us we couldn't jump in! Such a tease.
Dinner was fun and having let the driver go earlier, we hung around at the bottom of the driveway looking for taxis on the near empty street. Being on the phone, I missed how it came about that I was climbing into the back of some random couple's car along with a few others. Turns out they'd taken pity on us and offered to make a couple of runs and drop us off! They were quite excited when they drove up alongside our truck and promised to come back in the morning to check it out.

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Friday
June 15

Nico, Justice and Suse were up and at 'em early for a round of golf but ended up having to wait until 8am. After breakfast, the couple that had driven us home the previous night arrived to take a look at the truck and requested photos of us all with them. A lovely couple, he wished me a happy birthday and disappeared, returning with a shoebox and a plastic bottle containing green powder. Handing me the shoebox first, I opened it to find a pair of black leather sandals and was encouraged to try them on. Obligingly, they were a little big but he thought they looked 'swell' on me and I became the amused -and grateful! - owner of a pair of men's shoes! The plastic bottle was then handed to me and is meant to be mixed with food or water and taken daily as a natural immune booster. He was kind enough to warn me that 'it tastes really, really bad' and it continues to sit under my chair to this day...

I excused myself and wandered out the back of the clubhouse and down the steep stairs to find the golf players and followed them for a few holes, taking photos. Walking along behind everyone, I saw one of the caddies suddenly jump sideways and once he recovered from his shock, he pointed at a long, thin green snake that had reared up in the grass. We hadn't even been looking for snakes! I did plead for its life but understood that being a poisonous snake, they were going to kill it so I took photos and walked off.

I packed away my tent now that the morning sun had dried the condensation that had accumulated and then head back down for the final two holes, in time to see Nico take out his caddie with a wayward ball and then for the golf club to go flying out of his hands! He was horrified but we appreciated the laugh!

We left around midday and drove towards Obosombo along a variety of sealed smooth roads and potholed gravel stretches. Counting mileage on the map, we realised we weren't going to reach our destination and we set about scouting the surrounds for a free camp. Veering off the main road, we followed an empty road for sometime, passing through a village before finding a small area that was perfect for us. Already beyond dusk, Nico and Suse set off for the village to ask for permission to camp while we put up tents and set up the kitchen.

Hearing the crowd before spotting their torches, Suse and Nico returned with what looked like half the village in tow! Being in Nigeria meant being able to converse in english which we were all thrilled about but here, several older people only spoke their local language, using the children to translate. It turns out that some villagers had never seen, let alone spoken to white people! None of us had actually thought this was possible anymore but here we were! Children, shy at first but growing bolder as we smiled and spoke to them, touched our skin and said it was 'smooth'. This amused us no end because we looked at ourselves, covered in bug bites and scabs, and thought it was anything but smooth!

Finding it again difficult to eat with such an audience, I sat with the others huddled in a small area, not disrupting the locals seated on our chairs. Most kept to themselves but one picked up a bowl and asked for food. It just isn't possible. If we had enough for everyone present then we would, but there's usually so many people. Anyway, he seemed more joking than serious and blended back into the crowd amicably enough, allowing us to finish and tidy up. Bed was not far behind and from my tent, I watched the procession of torch lights leave our camp and head for the main road and their own beds.

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