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Published: April 24th 2016
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Bus Breakdown
Sketch I did while we waited for a new bus. Complete with the morning rooster and the local dogs who were checking us out. Butt falling asleep? Haven't been approached by 50 village dogs? No half naked old men wearing towels watering plants from a dog bowl in your life? Sounds like it is time to break down on the overnight first class bus to Krabi. We are sitting on a concrete curb in the town center watching the town come to life. In the hour and a half since the engine rattled and died, bikes carrying hocks of meat, eviscerated chickens, and uniformed school school children have looky-looed past us, as we twiddle our thumbs and try not to think about making our next connection- the express speedboat from Krabi town to Koh Lanta. We have left the tourist metropolis and have entered hard, rural, Thailand, where the air is thick with agricultural fire smoke, and absolutely no one speaks English. We don't speak a lick of Thai, but we are far more experienced in awkward cross lingual conversation than three days ago and our Thai speaking bus stwered has assured us that we will be shuttled to our destination. Now there are dogs fucking five feet to our left. Two buses have come and gone, picking up the natives Thai speakers and those
without luggage. The bus broke down around 6am, it is now about 8 now. Shops are open now, and the street buzzes with motorbikes transporting the locals to work.
The first class bus (while it lasted) was more like an airplane than a Greyhound. The steward passed out drinks, we took assigned seats, and the A/C was set to arctic. Our fellow passengers included a surly tank of an American, a couple of robed Buddhist priests, and several Muslim women (the south of Thailand is majority muslim). The overnight ride was punctuated by several stops for food and drinks (included in the ticket price) and we slept through the night in relative comfort. Kendall's decision to purchase a neck pillow continues to pay off. Who knows where we will sleep next? If we don't make our connection to Koh Lanta, we may die here, in the sticks. Remember us.
Written curbside at sunrise ------
We made it!
After the third and final bus arrived to pick us up, we had an uneventful ride to Krabi town, where we enjoyed fresh Dim Sum and a cold beer while we waited for our minivan
Town Center
Where we were stranded early morning. to take us to the ferry. Kendall's pale skin continues to attract the amazement of the locals - when we entered the Dim Sum shop, the head chef and proprietor stopped what she was doing to stand next to Kendall, pinch both arms, and emphasize to the laughing crowd how different the skin tones were. Thai culture, like many places in Southeast Asia, considers pale skin to be the most important attribute of physical beauty. There is an unfortunate racial aspect to this: ethnic Thais, especially those from the southern regions, have dark skin while the educated northerner populations are far more pale. As a result, Kendall has gone from a passing 3 to a solid 6 and she is loving every minute of it. We have lost count of the number of discrete selfies taken with Kendall in the background in the last few days. House of Cards is the most watched American show in Thailand, so the Claire Underwood haircut has also drawn much attention.
Now that we are in Koh Lanta, Kendall is finally among her people. The backpacking stoners flock to Ko Phi Phi and the aging sexpats line the streets of sin city Phuket
and Pattaya, but for some reason Koh Lanta belongs to the Swedish (and the stoners). The island is a strange melange of Swedish tourists, dark-skinned Thai Rastas, and Muslim workers. Everyone seems to get along perfectly and there is none of the cross-cultural tension that is visible in places like Bangkok or Pattaya. Here, the ancient Sea Gypsy villages border mosques shouting the call to prayer on one side and tie-dyed bars blasting Bob Marley and advertising shroom shakes and spliffs on the other. Koh Lanta is also home to a vast array of wildlife, and it's common for the drivers to pull to a stop while troupes of monkeys, or even herds of elephants, trample across the pavement. The birds sound like dying pigs and there are rumors of manta rays breeding in the coral shallows outside our hotel. Tomorrow we will explore the island and report back.
Until next time!
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Cody
non-member comment
Kendall DOES have absurdly fair/pale skin.