Defining words.

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Gypsy hearted. Lost. Unstable. Confused. Naïve. Nomad. Soul searcher. Unbalanced.

All vivid words I have heard being used by others to describe, not themselves; but more so expressed in a way to define me.

Over the years I have bounced back and forth with this idea. Sometimes loving the connotation that embodies those descriptive words and sometimes hating the very fact that those same words can define me.

By true definition each one of those words describes parts of me, not all of me; or parts of my path not my entire lifeline. Unfortunately, most originate with negative association and therefore when used relating to my life, choices or being; I have found it a bit unnerving.

For instance, Unstable. The New Oxford American Dictionary quotes “prone to change, fail, or give way.”

Prone to change. If you know me well your head is shaking furiously, Yes!

Fail. Of course I have failed but believe a must to continue growth.

Give way. As I age I learn giving in at times is just as important as standing your ground.

And so I would have to agree, I am unstable. But aren’t we all? I believe my ability to live unstable and yes I am using the word ability that again, by definition quotes, “talent that enables someone to achieve a great deal,” has lead the way to my ambition or the goals accomplished in my life thus far.

If my unstableness has positioned me to move states, move countries, change relationships, change dreams, change beliefs and change who I am or who I believe myself to be for the better; then by all means call me unstable. I will embrace change, embrace failure and give way to what lessons or paths or doors open in their wake.

In essence my gypsy heart allowed me to travel to far away places. Being lost has many times helped me find more of myself. Being unstable has taught me there is no fear in change. Confusion has lead me to trust in the power of following my heart. My naïve dreams keep my soul innocent. The nomad inside brings me back to basics and reminds me what I actually need is very primitive. My necessity to soul search is mirrored in my want to constantly evolve. When my balance is off, I tend to humbly remind myself of what is important.

Although I know words should not define me, I embrace the delineation that they embody. For I wouldn’t be me today if those definitions did not at some point actually bring meaning to my timeline.

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Comments

[Jan]

:)

[judy bonfiglio]

Words that hurt can change who we are
Once again someone has obviously given you their opinion of your "Wildflower" ways. I adore and admire the way you have turned all those negative words into something positive. Without those positive thoughts you could crumble in on those comments. The people who have those thoughts are generally the ones who can not think outside the box. Oh, what a boring life they must live or they are so unaware of the beauty that lies outside of those four walls. May all your life find you on the outside looking in, for your arena will far surpass those within those four walls. Love and miss you. Keep writing. There was an ad for a journalist over on Anna Maria Island for the local paper. I told Uncle Mike that it would be perfect for you LOL

[jkc]

as usual, gripping!
the truth in your writing makes it beautiful. and you shouldn't change a thing!