Northern Laos

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After overeating and stressing out my poor shrunken stomache I hopped on a sleeping bus to Vientiene. These buses provide a narrow single bed per 2 people, just long enough for an Asian person (or me). Luckily I had a typical small Laos woman next to me and I have long ago mastered the art of sleeping like a pin so this was not as awkward as you might think. I slept reasonably well and arrived in Vientiene at some point quite early in the morning where tuk tuk drivers charge high rates for a share tuk tuk into town. I didn't feel like staying in the city so I had breakfast and went straight to the provincial bus station to go to Vang Vieng. This was a bad move because I'd hoped to meet Annette and Florentine at some point in Laos (they came in from the North) and it turns out they were already as far south as Vientiene so I missed them. I got convinced into taking a minivan to Vang Vieng since it left earlier and could make the trip in half the time the bus could (or so they said and actually they were right). I arrived around midday and stayed at a place by the river, a bit of a walk from the main strip to get away from the trashyness.

Vang Vieng is about as trashy as it gets but I was told it was still worth going for the amazing countryside. It obviously became touristy because of it’s beauty but at some point things went very very wrong. My guess is it was when maybe the 4th or 5th riverside bar set up by the tubing launch up stream. The place now attracts young crowds set on doing nothing but getting wasted everyday at the riverside bars who all play their own bad music, competing with the bar 10m downstream to drown them out. They offer waterslides and flying foxes into the river and people who are off their face enough smash into the rocks and die. Everyone walks around town topless or in bikinis and sit around watching 'Friends' or 'Family Guy' which are shown continuously at the never ending strip of restaurants. The actual town of Vang Vieng where locals live is 3km further up the road. I hired a tube that afternoon and floated very very slowly back into town - it took about 3 hours which is too long to still be enjoying yourself, especially when a storm rolls in, it starts to rain, its freezing, and you’re paddling and kicking frantically just to get somewhere. I've clearly lost all tolerance to the cold as my hands, feet and face had gone completely white and blue. I had a bit of a relapse of whatever I'd had in Don Det so after an amazing HOT shower I slept for a good 15 hours until the next morning.

I hired a bike and decided to explore some of the caves in the area. I was headed for the Elephant cave, 13km North but never made it that far as I came across two other caves. There's an entry fee, of course, but it includes a good torch. I was the only one at both of them and they were huge once you get inside. I discovered I'm not really a cave person and got really creeped out so didn't stay long in either of them. I went back to town and headed for another famous cave that has a big blue lagoon in or near it. I never made it here either – the road was aweful and I really just wanted to go swimming, so I turned off towards a cave that also said 'blue lagoon' on its sign. After refusing 2 guides who followed me up I spent a few minutes in the cave which was narrow and small but I think you could crawl in deeper if you wanted. I was heading for the exit when I heard a horrible grunting panting noise and realised a different guide had come up and into the cave. I saw his sillouette at the entrance, his arms waving over his head like he was trying to imitate a monster and for a minute I thought he was going to attack and rob me. I'm convinced they sent him up to scare me because I didn't want a guide. I then headed for the 'blue lagoon' which turned out to be just a regular part of a river with murky grey water and cows grazing right next to it. I left and decided no more caves. I did end up going to one more, just out of town because it had a really nice, crystal clear swimming hole near it. This was a cave for people who don't like caves - very high ceilings and artifical lights placed around the place to light it up. It was a nice cave but because of the lights it felt more like an artificial cave, like the magic cave with father christmas in the Meyer center.

After my swim I had a few hours to waste before my bus so I tried to waste them watching Friends but only lasted about 40 minutes before I was ready to shoot myself so I just wandered around. I booked a night bus from Vang Vieng to Luang Prabang through my guesthouse but they booked me on an earlier bus that left at 7:30 and since it's not really very far to LP we arrived at 3:30am while the bus continued on to who knows where further north. I shared a tuk tuk with two Canadian girls to a lonely planet reccommended guesthouse for its cheapness. I payed about $5 a night which is really good for Luang Prabang and probably the cheapest place there is - but for once you really do get what you pay for and it wasn't very nice.

I slept for a few hours then walked around the tourist street before hiring a bike and venturing further out. It's a very pretty town/city with many Wats but I was happy enough just cruising around looking at the streets. Around midday it started to look like rain but I decided to ignore this and continue over the bridge and as far as possible from my guesthouse for the downpour. I then got completely drenched riding back and spent several hours in my room waiting for it to stop. By late afternoon I went out for another bike ride and climbed up Phu Si hill which had amazing views of the surrounding hills and an almost sunset. The Hmong night markets were up and running by the time I got down so I looked around them before going back to my room. The markets also have lots of food including many very cheap fill up your own plate places that were vegetarian and even vegan but I was feeling too sick to eat which was very sad.

I hopped on a minibus the next morning headed for Nong Khiaw which seemed to have added an extra row of seats meaning there wasn't even enough room for my legs which are pretty short. It was uncomfortable but the road was a thousand times better than I expected. It was sealed with barely a pothole in sight and reasonably straight the whole way. I had originally planned on going up to Luang Nam Ta to go trekking then cross into Vietnam on the Northern road through the mountainous region. This is an 8 rather than 3 hour trip on roads I read were increadibly windy making many people on the bus sick and involves another 3 or 4 days travel on equally bad roads to make it to Hanoi. Given my stomaches current weak constitution and my general unwellness I chose to go to Nong Khiaw and then back to Luang Prabang to cross into Vietnam which is faster and has much better roads. I knew I would regret this decision as soon as I felt better but I just couldn't face it at the time. From Nong Khiaw I took a boat to Muang Ngoi Neua which takes an hour and is worth it just for the views from the boat. Muang Ngoi Neua is a small village accessible only by boat and supposedly has plenty of trekking set up. It's true that most places offer trekking but its very expensive or impossible to have a giude for just one person so I needed to find more people keen on trekking - this was the same problem I had in Luang Prabang only there I was being more picky. I could have easily joined a group going on a two day trek but I wanted to go on a 3 or 4 day hike with one of the proper eco-tourism companies. After asking around in Muang Ngoi I realised I couldn't even do a 2 day hike since there where no groups going the next day. It turns out a French father and son who had been on my bus and boat were keen so we booked a 2 day trek back to Nong Khiaw for the next day. There were ALOT of French people there - many on the bus and everyone other than myself on the boat. I shared a room with one of them making it the cheapest place I've stayed at, paying just $1 a night. I had dinner with my trekking buddies and a few other French people from my bus. The village has electricity from generators from 6 until 10pm which is only really used for lights which attract more bugs than they are worth.

It rained most of the night and I was worried we wouldn't be able to go but that didn't seem to be a problem. We had to take a boat down the river for about 10 minutes to another village, a low land Laos village from where we walked on a muddy dirt road for several hours to another 2 villages. One is a Kehmu village where we had lunch and the other was a Hmong village which had been relocated by the government to be close to the newly constructed dirt road leading to the highway and also running water (each village had a tap). Before this road, the path we took or the river was the villagers only access to the main road and the rest of the world. It was a steep and very slippery climb mostly through slash and burn farmland which is horrible but means there are no trees to block to amazing views. The French guys were not unfit but they had bad shoes which were not coping with the mud so it was slow and I spent more time standing and waiting than I did walking. After reaching the top it was a very nice and easy up and down path skirting the mountain across to the Hmong village we were staying at for the night where we arrived at around 5pm.

This trek is very new and has only been offered in the last 6 months and we were only the 7th group to take it. In a way this makes it mush more authentic but it also made it a little weird and awkward. To spread out the money, trekkers sleep and eat with a different family each time so it was the first time this family had ever hosted westerners. Everyone in the village was very shy and we barely saw anyone other than our hosts. Even though our guide could translate, it was impossible to have a conversation or anything close to it with them. We had a shower in the stream when we first arrived. Women have to wear a sarong and go into the stream separately from the males. We then sat out outside listening to a pig getting slaughtered while our guide told us a little about Hmong people and their culture. We had dinner with the family (almost - we sat around 2 round tables but had different serving dishes and we were given our own plates while they eat straight from the serving bowls). There were plenly of vegetables so my veganism was never a problem although I can only assume they use animal fat for all their cooking since they are self sufficient. After dinner there was not much else to do and it was apparently time for bed - at 8pm. I slept on a bed with the daughter since, as a female, I couldn't sleep on the other bed with the French guys. I was not tired and lay awake for hours while the daughter fell asleep and turned into the biggest bed hog ever practically pushing me off and trying to spoon me. Awkward.

We left early the next morning for the village on the highway which is a two hour (or 3 hours in our case) hike down the mountain passing through another smaller Hmong village. This is the road the villagers take if they go to school (they stay down there all week) and to sell their produce at the Sunday markets. They leave at 4am to get to the markets by 6am carrying all their vegetables and rice, then walk back up 2 hours later - barefoot or in thongs. No one in these villages wear their traditional clothes.

We caught a sawngthaew back to Nong Khiaw, had lunch, then caught a minibus back to Luang Prabang. This was again overcrowded and uncomfortable but apart from the morning bus there is no more transport from the village apart from the minivans which have approximate departure times but will only actually leave when full (or overfull) so we were lucky to get anywhere. I spent most of it on the edge of my seat space aiming my face at the air con vents that everyone in the middle row was hogging. I made a decision to catch the nightbus straight away to Vietnam rather than stay an extra night so it was a big rush with no time for anything like food, shower, or even changing after the hike.

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Comments

[m.i.a.]

i pretty much think you were born for overnight sleeping buses mado! whereas i on the other hand would not cope with my extreme sleeping style! boy oh boy it always so sad when you visit some place and see why it has become so popular because it is so naturally beautiful but has been completely destroyed by wasteful humans... grrrrr. yeah i can understand not being into caves - they are creepy and i always imagine aliens/dormant alien viruses being in them! (way too much xfles for me here!) but i did enjoy the magic cave reference!