A Very Happy Birthday to Leeza (who wants to go back to Cambodia)

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It's been a while since rapped at ya. You see, I've just been having so much fun teaching in Jining that my blog must simply have slipped my mind.

As the title would imply, today is my birthday. To all the people who didn't wish me a Happy Birthday, I say thank you very much. And a VERY VERY SPECIAL thanks to the folks at work who DID wish me a Happy Birthday, including my colleagues and bosses.

I am now a senior citizen and, I think, older than most of my bosses, which is so awkward THAT IT BURNS. But they did throw me a small birthday ceremony, which I will relate to you. Actually, there's not much to it. They took me aside after work today and brought me a Giant Stuffed Puppy, some (raspberry) vodka, a cake and a birthday crown. We all ate some cake, sang the Happy Birthday song in Chinese, and then went about our separate ways. I left and spent an hour trying to catch a taxi home, carrying my bag and vodka and teaching supplies and the Giant Puppy while wearing my birthday crown and wielding my infamous bamboo rod. (The whole time standing head and shoulders above everyone else with my out-sized hair glistening white in the setting sun.) It was HILARIOUS.

Here I want to add that, to those who didn't bother/haven't bothered in the past to call me, email me, or otherwise acknowledge my existence, (which means YOU Susan), well, thanks for nothing. It's become increasingly clear that I myself--having no friends, no family, no social support, no language abilities, no one to talk to, and the inability to so much as walk around the neighborhood without 1. drawing obscene amounts of attention, or 2. being totally lost and helpless--must begin to use this blog as a coping mechanism.

Oh. I've just reopened a very ugly can of worms. I will tell you about my day, and you will tell me I'm being negative and complaining (thanks, Life. Thanks, Karma) because you're a jerk (and the jerks know who they are!). Stop criticizing before you start! because I can't take just one more thing. There is a very fine line, if any, between writing my current experience down and whining: f'irnstance, I'm rather tired of walking home for a half-hour stretches, in tears much of that time, because I'm terrible at what I do and so paranoid that I'm about to be fired, which will make me a failure at just one more thing in life. I'm rather tired of having no one to talk to, vent on, rant, rave and rail to; and I'm additionally rather tired of recurring nightmares.

I'm also rather tired of rice and solitary confinement.

There. That's the truth. Have a nice day!

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Photos

My Birthday Cake
Topped with delicious Dragon Fruit, green cherries, and tomatoes. Tomato cake...mmm...

Comments

[susan]

I do so
I do so email you and I've sent you a package, actually two. Excuse me if I have life to get on with here. I am as available as I can be. Happy Belated Birthday and enjoy your giant puppy.

[Heather]

Happy Birthday! Your post was great and your photos of that cake and candles were incredible! Makes me want to celebrate my birthday in China! My blog is looking for travel photos, reviews (like of yummy birthday cake!), etc, to share. If you have the time, check it out at dirty-hippies.blogspot.com, or email us at [e-mail]. Continued fun on your travels! Heather :)

[Global Drifter]

BIRTHDAYS
My father called me. He said Happy Birthday. I received your package BUT I DIDN'T GET A PHONE CALL. Love, Leeza

[Alan]

oh dang!
Leeza, count me among the guilty. I was in Shanghai on the 11-14th and then left to come home on the 15th. Yes, I'm among the Skyline Chili eating crowd now for the next 3 1/2 weeks until I head back over to Beijing on the 15th of June. Sorry I didn't email my congrats on your 21st b-day. I admittedly was being selfish and only focused on my return home. So now I owe you 2 lunches, and a proper cake.

[Global Drifter]

Have No Guilt
LOL, don't worry Alan, I was only guilt-tripping my family. I know you had to fly.

[Global Drifter]

LOL--
...and actually I'm a little older than 21.

[Danna Gorman]

Happy (belated) Birthday!
My baby girl, Miss Leeza/Yanzi?/Global Drifter! It's gonna be okay! I didn't even know you had a blog or else I would've been following it all this time. I was looking through my old emails when I saw the one from you where you invited me to join your blog. I must have been superbusy that day, opened and closed the email and then forgot you even had one. I didn't know you can subscribe and have them sent automatically (which I have now done). I LOVE your writing and LOVE you and while this post is the saddest one I've read so far and makes me feel like scum for missing your birthday (even though I don't think I've ever known when it was), it is by far the funniest thing I have ever read in my entire life. You really need to publish these writings someday. You are an amazing writer. I sooo wish I had been with you to celebrate your birthday and see you in your crown with your stuffed puppy and bamboo cane. The lotus candle is beautiful and the cake looks deeeelish! Don't cry Lizbeth! I am so proud of you, my fellow adventurer and Earth-lover. Helping those kids in the Cambodia orphanage is by far the coolest thing ever! That is kinda like MY dream. And a mango tree in the front? No wonder you wanna go back. You don't even have to pick them. God makes storms that throw them on the ground for you! God is good and I'm so happy you are getting to explore His creation at such a young age. Well, you said you were "ancient" compared to the others but you're younger than me and I haven't even started doing what you've been doing for years. I decided to take my TEFL/TESOL course online in the comfort of my own home. It's only $300 (vs. $1700 if I did it "in-classroom' in Egypt) and I can start today. I figure the sooner the better and who wants to be pregnant, stuck overseas in a land I've never been to, possibly without their husband? Technically, if I am motivated, I could have my certificate by the end of the month, but if I land a job or get busy doing volunteer work or something, I can just study part-time and take as long as 6 months to complete the course. I probably (hopefully) will not work in America ever again, however, since I no longer wish to support the corruption of the big oil guys who ARE our government because I don't want the White House staff to go use even 1 billionth of my tax dollars for their daily Coke and BBQ sandwiches, coffee and donuts, fancy rugs and drapes, latest computer software and office supplies, and 4-star resorts with 4-star catering for their caucus meetings, and plane rides all over the world, polluting our Earth. That's what goes on, 1 billion a year, and we pay for it. Such crap. Uh-oh. I'm turning negative like you! KIDDING! I was actually very, very impressed with all the blogs I've read so far. I don't think ANY of them were negative AT ALL! I'm glad you are making the best of your situation and at least you are helping others by teaching something. I at one time was against teaching English to foreigners but I have come to learn that it really doesn't matter WHAT you teach as long as you do it with sincerity, compassion and love...Bible's definition of love that is (patience, kindness, no keeping errors of wrongs, etc). Anyway, God Bless and keep in touch! Love, Danna

[Global Drifter]

Life Goes On
Thanks again for liking the blog. It means a lot to me when somebody tells me that. Good luck with your TESOL, and don't worry too much about supporting the oil industry. You do that if you buy anything at all, drive a car, run the heat or AC, or eat. We're all part of the system, and it's not much better in any other place--possibly New Zealand and the Maldives are an exception. Don't worry, I feel better by now.