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Published: October 30th 2009
Me Mrs. Wong and a scarecrow
They loved the scarecrow...we all got pictures by it, but this one is my favoriteSo, these are my final days….I will not know until next week at the earliest if all of my long hours and sleep deprivation paid off, but even if none of the 12 isolates that we eventually sent off for sequencing comes back successful…what I learned here will be a valued asset for the rest of my life. Not only the lab experience but also the cultural and emotional ones as well. Just moments ago Hua looked up (and I do mean looked up…I am a good foot taller than her) and said to me “Okay, we are done!” Music to my ears, but it also made me pause…no more playing in the lab with new techniques and different equipment and different protocols (God bless them!)…for all of my moaning and complaining…this is an awesome lab and I hope that they know how lucky they are to have such wonder facilities. I won’t lie, it is going to be hard to return to my closet of a lab and my den of a desk space…I have seen the other side and I like it. Sunlight and space are so under rated these days. There is something about being able to look
to my left and see the cityscape (albeit through a nice layer of smog) and look to my right and see a row of plants lining the walkway that is also outside…hard to have a bad day…you know? But if anything was going to…ruin my day that is…it was going to be the following: as mentioned before, everyone including Dr. Pan leaves for lunch at noon and return around 3 in the afternoon…everyone except for me. What am I going to do for 3 hours…go to my room and stare at the mold growing on the walls? There have been a few times that I make the 20 min hike (each way) off campus to the McDonalds for lunch, but usually I just stay in the lab. Plus, on this day, I did not want a repeat of the previous 3 nights where I was here until 11/12 at night so I stayed in the lab to work. I was in the electrophoresis room loading my gel when my arm knocked a pipet off the counter and onto the floor. Now, I am holding MY pipet so the one that fell onto the floor was left on the edge of
the counter by someone else, but alas…I am the only one there and my arm did knock it off…therefore…this is on me! I finish loading my gel then lean over to pick it up…it is BROKEN! I don’t mean a little broken…it is big time broken. In my 8 years in the lab, I have never seen a pipet break like this. My heart sank and all I could think about is how Hua was going to take this. Pipets are what we use to dispense liquids in very small amounts in the lab and they are not cheap. Unfortunately, it was only 1:30 so I had to sweat it out for 2 more hours. She got back and we got right to work on analyzing the results that I had gathered in her absence and I forget about the pipet….and then I remembered. Not thinking about it much I grab it off my desk and bring it to her starting off by saying “something terrible happened while you were gone.” See I was trying to over exaggerate the situation so when I showed her the pipet she would be relieved that it was not something truly terrible, but much
to my surprise she acted like I had just torched the whole lab. The look on her face was like I just told her that her family had just died….like I had just told her the worst news of her life. “Oh!” she said…some other things half in English half in Chinese…then she says clear as day, “you will bring this to Dr. Pan and tell him yourself…alone!” Then she advises me to lead off with the good news that we are sending off 12 isolates for sequencing. Now I am feeling sick to my stomach. I knew that Dr. Pan was intense, but Hua is so afraid to tell him about a broken pipet that she is going t throw the guest scientist under the bus? Then I start getting pissed…if this happened in my lab and I was hosting a visiting PhD student and she had broken a pipet, I would never make her tell Maria that she had done it and certainly I would not make her face Maria alone! But, then I got over that and started devising my approach. “I have good news and bad news…” This would more than likely be my approach in
Cloning
Hua was very patient with me but there were a few times that she would just take it out of my hands and do it for me..I just laughed...us scientist are all the same...uber control freaks! my own lab, but I was not sure that the saying would translate here in China so I scratch that idea. I figured that the visual evidence…just lay it all on the table is the only way to go. Worse case, he wants me to pay for it…best case…he laughs it off. Well, neither of these happened because I never confronted him with it. I just left the pipet on Hua’s desk…the day ended and I went home….never broaching the subject with him. I am assuming that he was told and based on his pleasant behavior towards me this morning I am going with…he is not devastated by it. I will make sure to ask Hua about it…but I think that the incident cleared up and was far more dramatic in my head, as is usually the case.
I just had my final meal in Gunagzhou with the Pan family. They took me to Papa John's and it was very delicious. I met their eldest son who could not even look at me he was so shy...have not had that effect on a boy in a long time haha. At one point during the meal Mrs. Wong leaned over
and told me that she did not want me to go and in that moment I felt the same way. I am going to miss her and the rest of the lab...it is a speical place and I was sure to let Dr. Pana nd Mrs Wong just how much I loved taking part in thier lives for these 2 weeks. Earlier as I was saying good bye to the graduate students they were equally as sweet. They all wanted their picture wtih me and my business card, they were so eager and excited to get it. They want me to send them the pictures that I took so that they can have a copy. I have been looking forward to returning home for weeks now and now that it is here I feel like it came too fast. Everyone expressed how much they want tos ee me again and I only hope that I do.
I have been thinking for a few days now how I wanted to write my final blog entry and many ideas came to mind…I think it only appropriate to write a “best practices.” A term I was first introduced to by the GK12
Broken pipet
See...a lot broken! program (who facilitated this trip for those of you not keeping up) so I thought it only fitting. A best practices is a document that you write summarizing everything that you learned and/or would do differently for the people ahead of you who have yet to do what you are writing the best practices for. So, here is my ole college try:
1) They are not kidding when they say that the Chinese have better hips due to their “squat facilities.” There is a technique to it and a fine art in certain circumstances and I applaud them for sticking to their guns and not converting to the toilet. That being said, I make the argument that there is nothing more sanitary about them….NOTHING! The argument is best made to someone that has also experienced the squat, but lets just say that if you don’t have tremendous thigh strength there is no way that it can stay sanitary…I am not speaking from experience…purely hypothetical! Plus, it is hard to take the sanitation argument seriously from the same people that think that a hole in the pants of infants is an acceptable form of potty training. Let me elaborate. I
Last day at my beautiful desk
I will have to say an intimate good bye later...I am really going to miss my desk. passed a little boy on the street last night being wiped by his father (kudos to the father) after taking a dump (that word has never been more appropriately used by the way) on the SIDEWALK. I did not stick around long enough to find out what, if anything, was done with the organic matter after the cleaning had commenced, but by the smell of China I would guess NOTHING! Once you notice the little turds and the hole in the pants of all infant children you are ruined. You can never not notice for the rest of your time in China. Once returning to the States, I will probably see pine cones on the ground and think that they are turds….I will see them everywhere and when I see a parent kneeling down next to an infant I will think the worst and cross the street without a second thought…and hold my breath just to be on the safe side. It is going to be an adjustment. As for the squatters…I am proud to say that I have survived them. I have not mastered them (I am proud to say that too) but I have survived them without any
notable incidents….truly….none.
2) The Chinese people are courteous, gracious, and generally very happy people…except when they are not. Everyone that I have had the pleasure of meeting on this trip have met the above description, some have even gone above and beyond rising to a level of accommodating that I myself would not meet. BUT, the Chinese people in general, and I mean the people that I have seen and/or come into contact with (literally) are pushy, rude, inpatient, and hygienically impaired. There are no lines in China…even when there is clearly a line that has formed…people will just walk right in front of you without even a look saying “you snooze you lose.” They push like there is one more ticket to the Taylor Swift concert and the next to enter the subway gets it…I was assaulted by an elderly lady with a roller basket the other day because she just had to get on the escalator before me. I have a scratch!!! This may seem minor, but in China I would prefer that my largest and most important protective organ (MY SKIN) be completely intact while I continue to wonder these streets (see above mention of defecation on
sidewalks). Waiting in line at McDonalds…a comfortable distance from the person in front of me…this is just asking to be cut in front of. It is just as good as saying “you look far more hungry than me…you go ahead and let me wait a little longer.” This is even true while waiting for the ATM on the street where in my opinion the "comfortable distance" is more than just a courtesy, it is a requirement. But, hearing other stories from people that have visited China, my leg scrap and my extra 5 minute wait at McDonald’s was a small price to pay to be living amongst the Chinese.
3) The Chinese have a reputation for being very very hard workers and they have lived up to this famous reputation in my experience, but that is not to say that I don’t think that the same amount of work could be done in half the time if a little more time management was employed. Their mentality is to do it right now…right this moment…without much forethought to steps 2 3 or 4 following step 1. I think that this goes back to the reason that I am here in the
first place, the education system in China. “The Chinese are taught how to answer questions where as Americans are taught how to ask them.” Not to wax on too much on this point, but I never would have understood the magnitude of this difference without coming to the Pan lab and seeing how they operate and how their minds work. It is fascinating. One of the nights that I was in the lab until the morning hours, me, Hua and another student started talking about music and the K word got brought up…karaoke! I have been in fear of this word since my arrival in China. I am a horrible singer…I cannot carry a note to save my life. Let me elaborate…once upon a time, many years ago, my sorority was putting on a production of Grease and who do they want to play Sandie…ME…and OH how they will soon regret this. I tried to talk them out of it but they insisted. So I have to sing “You’re the one that I want” (with alternative lyrics saying something about wanting to join AZD of course) in front of a hundred girls wanting to pledge a sorority. When we were
rehearsing one of my friends started to laugh (and being the self conscious 19 yr old that I was) I said…I told you I was bad…you guys brought this on yourselves and now you must reap the consequences of your stubbornness… and she said “but you are not even singing…you are just speaking the words to the melody of the song.” From this point on I realized that I am SOOO bad at singing that it is not even considered singing! Now, this is not to say that I do not relish in the frequent in-car sing along at the top of my lungs but solo stand up performances were eradiated from my life after my Sandie performance all those years ago. The Chinese LOVE karaoke, there are KTV signs everywhere, but I have managed to avoid entrance into a KTV for almost 3 weeks and in this moment I am holding my breath as they smile and giggle and talk about how much they love KTV…but…I was spared. Their work ethic prevailed and there was never a mention of taking me to a KTV. They did ask me to sing a Michael Jackson song, but they took no as
Me and one of the grad students
He was so sweet...he would get so nervous when I would talk to him. my answer and did not pursue the subject…maybe they could smell the terror…or they could tell by the tone of my voice that they did not actually want to hear me sing. Honestly though, I bet it would have been fun to see all of the graduate students singing American songs. Oh well.
4) The lab. I reread my blog from the other day and I am sorry for all of the typos. I am sure that all of my blogs have had their fair share of typos…I write them in the evenings after a long day of activity and I usually publish before I proof read but the last one was pretty bad. One point that I think was missed was the difference between my lab and this one…and there are MANY! They DON’T wear gloves for anything…except when they are in the electrophoresis room and that is due to the fluorescent dye that they use in the gels so that they don’t have to stain them after running them (one of many reasons why their gel protocol is AWESOME). This is very strange for me and something that I never got used to. Also, they don’t have lab
wide data sheets or protocols; it is every man for themselves. The labeling is scarce if at all. I already talked about their inability to time manage, but I wonder if it is on purpose in some way. They have to be here an expected number of hours every day so maybe they spread it out so that they always have something to be doing until 11 or midnight every night. If they got everything done by 6 they would have nothing to do for the rest of the night. Either way, it is far different from labs in the states.
5) The Chinese STARE! Not just a little bit…but a lot…a whole lot! It is like they have never seen a tall white girl in real life before. If I did not know better I would think that they thought I was some circus clown or sideshow that they were watching for entertainment. I was on the subway for the first time and at first I thought I was being paranoid thinking that everyone was staring at me…you know the feeling…like you might have tissue stuck to your shoe or food on your face…but in reality you are just being paranoid, but it kept happening. People would literally stare at me…not blinking or turning away just looking at me. The worst part is when they stare, then poke their friend who then starts to stare too then as they exit the subway they both start laughing out loud to each other…I don’t think that it is too far fetch to think that they were laughing at something that had to do with me. This is enough to make one question their outfit for the day, and this was just the beginning. In Nanjing we got stares but I was always with a group of Caucasians so the stares were shared amongst the entire group so no one person felt isolated…in Guangzhou I was the lone white person…and man the stares are intense. When coming back from Hong Kong Ming and I were on a tall escalator coming up from the subway and he says “did you know that everyone is staring at you?” and my reply was “you are just now noticing this?” I have become fairly used to it, but I still notice every time. The other day, someone stopped me in the street to ask me if I was from Australia (I get that a lot too). When I said no, America, he asked "are you from California." When I said no, Indiana, he said "they have fruit there?" When I said not really he said "thanks for talking to me." This is one of many instances where people stop me and try talking to me. They also wave A LOT! And smile A LOT! And can I just say that in China there is a fine line between being friendly and being creepy and there have been many instances where the line has been crossed.
6) The smog…the smog in China is thick and dense and horrible. When I first got off the airplane in Beijing I thought that a thick layer of fog had decended onto the city and then I realized that it was the all too infamous smog! I heard that there are over 60% more deaths in China due to the air quality than anywhere else in the world. This does not surprise me at all. The smog in Nanjing was less but still present and the smog in Guangzhou would fluctuate between peaks of blue sky and can hardly see the building across the pond from the lab. But, of all the cities I visited (Beijing not included) Hong Kong was by far the worst. I don’t know how people can live with such terrible air quality. I will go back home with black lung just from being here for 3 weeks…can you imagine living here? From what I understand, the smog is a fairly recent arrival to the China landscape…only since the industrial revolution here some 20 years ago did it become a problem so you would think that those that remember air before its current state would be fighting to return it to a healthy condition, but everyone here seem completely complacent with it, that or accepting…either way it is one of many reasons why I will never want to live here.
7) Finally, the food. I have witnessed people eating things that were never intended for human consumptions. As the saying goes, “In China don’t ask what is on your plate, just smile and eat.” This unfortunately is impossible for me and my personality. There is something inside me that demands to know what I am putting in my mouth and this was my demise here in China. It was fascinating to see what they consider delicacies and even more revolting, but this is just one of many differences between the Chinese culture and American culture. I tried my best not to be insulting, trying my hardest not to insult what they love, but I will not lie…it was a true test of my acting ability and I am a terrible actress… (see Sandie portrayal above). It is not only what they eat but how the eat it. There is a sucking technique that just about every Chinese person uses no matter what the food is, I think that it had something to do with the fact that they don’t use spoons or forks…so they suck. Also, they can put a chicken foot in their mouth and spit out all of the undigestable parts (see before I would have said the inedible parts, but I have learned that the Chinese do not think in those terms) and within seconds it comes out with just the bone…this is a party trick that you should ask all your Chinese friends to teach you. It will blow the cherry stem trick out of the water. The way that they can manipulate food in their mouths is one of the most impressive things I have witnessed since being in China and I have seen some amazingly impressive things. And of course….I already knew that I did not have a fondness for Chinese food. I eat it about once a year when taken there by other people mainly, but I know now..beyond a shadow of a doubt that I HATE HATE HATE Chinese food. I really abhor it. If I ever have Chinese food again it will be too soon and I am not exaggerating or joking here. Well, double pan fried noodles from P.F. Chang’s might be good in a few years when I have begun to forget about the food (or lack thereof) that I have ingested these past 3 weeks.
8) Other things that I have learned:
a. When forced, the body can live on blue Gatorade and Snickers for weeks on end.
b. When told to “go rest” you should because you never know when you will be at the lab until midnight.
c. After seeing someone wear the same outfit 3 days in a row (and smell like it) it makes it far easier to go a few extra days without shaving while wearing capri’s.
d. Independence is terrifying but when you actually do something independent like walk the streets of Guangzhou alone at night, it is liberating! Doing something you are scared of often has this effect.
e. Working like a dog is a sure fire way to sleep through the night on a bed made of plywood.
f. When you go from walking very little to walking everywhere every day, my ankles swell to the size of oranges.
g. Speaking of fruit, I learned that I hate papaya and like clementines.
h. Far more than you realize can be communicated through body language and gestures and on the other side of the coin, you would be surprised at how dense someone can be when they really don’t want to figure out what you are trying to say to them.
Well, I am sure that there are plenty more best practices that I will think of on my VERY LONG flight home, but for now these are my thoughts.
I want to thank you all so much for reading my blog and supporting me while on this journey. I learned so much about myself and about another culture. I am forever changed by my experiences here in China and I hope to return someday…with my husband this time!! China is a beautiful country with so much to offer and with people that have so much to give. Although I doubt that I will ever learn Mandarin, I hope to continue the relationships that I forged here and build new ones in the future. One of the first things I would do every morning was check my e-mail and check my blog for comments. Reading all of the comments everyday really kept me in touch with my loved ones and really made me appreciate how much you all mean to me. For this final blog entry I hope so get off the plane tomorrow and have many comments to look forward to reading….maybe I will even be able to check them during my 4 hour layover in Beijing or my 3 hours layover in Chicago…..tomorrow is going to be a marathon day…good thing I have Sunday to recover. Eat and sleep…that is the only thing on my agenda until further notice.
As a quick aside, turns out that when you supplement your diet with Gatorade and Snickers, you don’t lose weight so for all of you worried about my eating habits…I might have actually gained a few pounds…maybe my ankles are not actually swollen but just FAT from all of the sugar. LOL
All my love,
Mariah
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Josh
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Hole for pooping
Poop Hole huh?? OMG... I am still laughing about this! While it may be a gross the visual, in my head it could almost make me cry from laughing. As for singing... I can confirm this. You are the only person to be the 1st one out (every time) on American Idol karaoke. Considering I didn't even know the words to a song and made them up as a went I still did better... shameful! Regardless I will be happy to have my tone deaf wife home soon where she can enjoy comfy beds, Mac n Cheese and a separate Shower/Toilet combo.