Copan, the Ruins, & The Mayans

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Arrived in Copan and began asking cabs about the cost to get to La Casa de Café hotel. You have to set a price with the cab drivers before you get into their taxi, or they might try to cheat you and charge you a brazo(arm) and a pierna (leg) when you get to the location. A Honduran woman speaking Spanish, offered us a ride, but because of our past travels we have learned to trust no one. Unfortunately, we assume that people are trying to take advantage of us, because we have been burned before. So, we ignored her and went to other cabs. In this case, we f’d up. Her and her husband were actually on the bus with us, and with her husband, they happen to own the La Casa de Café hotel. Her husband followed us and said, “What are you doing? You know my wife was offering you a free ride back to our hotel, right?” That was my first of many dumbass moments in Honduras. Not a good start to get the hotel owners mad at you on your first day there. We apologized profusely and they forgave us, kind of.

It was a nice hotel and the minute we checked in, I got a $20 massage from perhaps the best hands that I’ve ever felt. I was in desperate need of a massage due to lugging my backpack and sleeping awkwardly on the plane without my neck pillow. This woman rocked. It was the kind of massage where you fall asleep and dream about heaven, and then wake up and you’re still there. She could feel where I was sore and instantly worked on the problem areas. If I wasn’t married, she would be mine even though she outweighed me by a hundy.

We then had dinner and met a stray cat that I named Stick. Unfortunately, he was named Stick, because it matched his appearance. When you get to Honduras, find Stick and feed him for me please. Even after showers to remove the encrusted sweat, it was still incredibly hot and we had no AC. Despite this, we fell immediately asleep, and had malarone (malaria medication) infested dreams. Don’t remember the dream too well, but I did jump out of bed during the night fearing something. I don’t think I’ll ever know what it was that freaked me, but I was ready for it. Note to self. Get AC and stop having nightmares. We met some people at the hotel from New York. I only caught two of their names. Randa and her boyfriend, Brent. They were cool and laid back folks.

Copan itself is beautiful and quaint with its cobblestone streets and is nestled within lush green mountains that look as if an artist had just painted them.

THE RUINS

The Mayan ruins, also known as the “Athens of the new world”, are one of Honduras’s top tourist destinations. We woke up early in the morning so we could try to beat the heat as best we could. I was still feeling great after the massage, and I was raring to go. Saw lots of colorful birds around the entrance of the ruins (parrots and macaws) eating fly covered fruits, making exotic noises, and playing with each other. The birds were used to people and when I walked over to them, they would actually meet me halfway. I felt like I was as interesting to them as they were to me. I don’t blame them, because I am pretty interesting.

We wandered around the ruins and it was really cool. The primary problem with the ruins are that we’re spoiled. We went to Angkor Wat in Cambodia and those ruins were incredible. In Angkor Wat you felt like you were walking in a painting. In Copan, it was interesting, but paled in comparison to Angkor Wat. I equate it to going to the beach. If you’re from Oklahoma and go to the beaches of Los Angeles, you are going to love it. If you’re from Los Angeles and go to the beaches of Honduras, you’re not going to appreciate it, because you’re spoiled. One thing that makes Copan better than Angkor Wat is that it was so much less crowded, which led to a peaceful calm as we walked around. We were on top of one of the ruins and did not see anyone else for at least twenty minutes as we just listened to the birds chirp. I sat there and wondered if I would have made a good Mayan king.

MAYAN HISTORY

The Mayans kicked ass in Copan starting at around 426 A.D. by the guy with the best name ever, Yax K’uk’Mo’. Yax was a revered shaman who had an addiction to apostrophes. But you know when you have apostrophes in your name, you kick ass, which is why I’m changing my name to E’R’I’C’ or maybe just ‘, but we’ll see. They’re still excavating the ruins and only found out about Yax in 1989, so maybe there is an even older ruler before Yax down there.

A bunch of rulers with weaker names and less apostrophes followed Yax, but they all basically built more ruins. I guess they wouldn’t build ruins because that would be depressing. So actually, they built beautiful structures and stellas (statues) that would eventually become ruins. The most famous structure at the ruins is the Hieroglyphic Stairway which is the longest hieroglyphic inscription in the Americas and in all honesty, it is pretty bitchin’. You are not allowed to walk on it and it stays under a protective tarp. Staring up at this stairway, at the past rulers of Copan etched in stone, is a humbling sight and makes you realize that you’re just a small cog in the big world.

The 2,500 glyphs detail the past of Copan, up to that point. The only thing better than the stairway, was the name of the ruler who had it built. Drumroll please…Smoke Shell. I’m completely serious. I am getting great names to name my children when I have them. How awesome would it be if I had twins and at school roll call they called out Yax K’uk’Mo’ and Smoke Shell Bram. Those kids would be worshipped and their dad would be envied by all of the other kids. Hopefully this will fly with Danielle but I’m worried that she won’t see how great an idea this is due to that annoying quality that she possesses called sanity.

Eventually U Cit Tok’ came around, his rule was never completed due to the end of the Mayans. As you probably know, no one truly knows for sure how the Mayan’s reign collapsed. Environmental and population growth are the main arguments, but I think it was because U Cit Tok’ had only one apostrophe. Eventually the Spaniards came in and claimed the land in 1524.

We met a toothless tour guide at the ruins named Tony who can give tours in six different languages. Apparently language learning is more important than oral hygeine and humor to Tony because he told us a joke about UCLA that absolutely made no sense, but we laughed anyway because we wanted to make up for not trusting the hotel owners from the day before.

Next to the ruins, we walked on a nature path and saw an iguana. We also saw a dragon-fly looking thing that had four yellow dots on its wings, so when it was flying, it looked like it was four completely different insects! When it landed, you realized that it was only one bug and made you wonder about what hallucinogenic was in the water. And fugget about the butterflies. They’re everywhere. They’re huge, colorful, and did I mention that they’re huge? On one of the signs, there was this huge moth/tarantula looking thing that scared the bejesus out of me. The path was cheesy with poorly written signs and drawings, but the animal, bird, and plant life was beautiful. I believe this theme will continue in Honduras. I also overheard some westerners talking about how they were going to go to Uruguay (this will make sense later).

After the ruins, we went back to the hotel. Danielle got a massage from my new Honduran wife and we (Danielle and I) took a walk. We met some kids on the way, and gave them some of the toys that we brought with us. They loved us, their parents loved us, and we felt good. We went to get a drink at a place called Twisted Tanya’s that was deader than the Mayans, so we went to another X-Pat (Ex-Patriot) bar called the Red Frog that was rocking. We actually ran into…the Uruguay threesome from the ruins. I told you it would make sense. Jeremy and Sarah were from Connecticut and Laura was from Finland. They are doing a Spanish immersion program in La Ceiba. What that means is that they are living with a family and being taught Spanish at a local school. It really is a great deal because the family gives you three meals a day and you get a private Spanish tutor for very very cheap. We drank too much, played foosball (we won!), and went back to the hotel too late because we had to wake up at 6:30am to get to Gracias.

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Photos

Hide and seek
Where's Danielle?

estella again
Why are all of these so scary? If I were a Mayan kid, I'd never want to leave my house.

mean estella
Gulp

Heiroglyphic stairway close-up
Pretty cool...

Comments

[Melanie]

Have you learned nothing from India?
Don't pet the pupppppppiessssss!