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Published: September 28th 2007
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My BFS sorta looked like this
I didn't exactly have time or wits to ask the spider to pose for a picture, so I Googled around and found this similar guy. Just a quick story about the Big Freakin' Spiders we saw this week.
One evening last week Lucas came running into our family room, soaking wet with a towel around his waist. "There's a big spider in my shower! I'm not going back in there!"
Steve and I took a look, and sure enough, crouched on the curtain rod was this SIGNIFICANTLY large spider. Sort of yellow-ish, orangey. Long, arched legs - the worst kind. My immediate thoughts were KILL, KILL, KILL the bad spider, but Steve's motto is "Spiders are our friends." (With friends like these...)
He tried to "shoo" it off the curtain rod onto the floor (where he would presumably shake hands, hands, hands with it and usher it out the door), but the darned thing just POOF...disappeared. WHERE WAS IT!!?? We looked in every corner, behind the toilet, around the garbage can but the little bugger was REALLY good at hiding. We eventually gave up (leaving me with a spider-sized pit in my stomach) and I vowed never, ever to go into that bathroom again. But I just couldn't go to bed that night knowing there was a spider lurking in that bathroom, so I crept back in with my special spider-squashing tennis shoe and took another look around. And there he was, just WAITING for me at the base of the toilet. He didn't move, so I used my special whacking technique and took that spider out of the game. I triumphantly tossed the body (it practically SPLASHED) in the toilet, where Lucas could happily discover it dead and pee on it in the morning.
So, done deal, right? Well, if you ask Steve, he'll tell you that God punishes those who kill spiders, and today the big brother of the dead spider came back to avenge his brother's death!
This morning, I woke up and washed my face in the sink. As I was wiping my face off, I took a peek in the mirror and, to my horror, saw a Big Freakin' Spider crawling off the towel and ONTO THE SIDE MY FACE. I gave one of those primal yelps, immediately dropped the towel, and saw for just a fraction of a second as the spider hit the floor.
And then, silence.
Now, there is only one thing worse than seeing a BFS in your bathroom, and that is NOT seeing the BFS that you KNOW is in your bathroom. My first (terrifying) thought was that it had climbed up my pajama leg, and I almost passed out at the thought of it being trapped in there, just waiting to give me its lethal bite. I ripped the pajamas off, then danced around a bit, lifting my wet face towel and wondering where the heck the spider was!! I looked in every crook and cranny that I could think of (including the base of the toilet, in case that's where spiders turn to in peril), but again, couldn't find the bugger. These spiders are GREAT hiders.
At this point I really couldn't do anything more than continue with my morning routine, and after about 3-4 minutes I glanced back at my towel on the rack and saw him crouched under the rack hinge! What a great hider! This time he was not moving, so I called out to Steve, and at the same time went to get my trusty tennis shoe. Steve came in, and, after pointing the spider out, I helpfully handed him my tennis shoe.
Steve would not take any part of killing a spider, so while I was truly regretting calling him up (so I could have whacked the BFS on my own), he threw a Kleenex on it and after a couple skirmishes managed to scoop him up and take him out on the veranda where he tossed him in the bouganvilla.
Now, of course, I can only lie awake in my bed and ponder what fresh new plan this spider is hatching to come get me. I'll never be able to pick up a towel in peace again...
If anyone knows anything about spiders, I'd love to know what type my tormentor is. He's pretty big, but not tarantula big, and definitely not as heavy. This guy is big and fast - basically LITHE. Sort of the greyhound of spiders, with the general circumference a doorknob. I Googled "yellow spider" and "orange spider" but didn't find much there (except, frankly, pictures of much much bigger and scarier spiders. It makes me feel a little wimpy writing down this huge event where you can Google much much much creepier guys.) I"m posting a picture of the closest thing I could find. One distinguishing feature (besides being really fast and a good hider) is that its legs have black tips. Any guesses?
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SonjaG
Sonja Gustafson Trautman
Comment from Lucas:
For the record I am not as big of a wimp as the entry makes me look like. After I saw the spider on the curtan rod about 6 or 7 inches from my face, I calmly finished shampooing and condtioning my hair. Then, I sorta dried off and I went into the family room and let my parents know that there was a giant spider in my bathroom and they should check it out. Just to let y'all know, just before I took the shower there was a 1.5 inch grasshopper on my towel rack with wings longer than its body. Lucas.