Kushtia 4

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I had a really fantastic day today! We were very successful getting surveys done because we went early in the morning before the men left to work for the day (the majority of the men there work in agriculture, it’s primarily rice and sugar cane fields here, some are rickshaw-wallahs, some are shopkeepers, and some have business, or academic jobs). Yesterday evening we were also very successful, but we also almost started a fight. A man went past us pulling a van (the rickshaw with the platform instead of a seat) and said something rude to us (or perhaps just to me, and I’m not sure how rude it was, probably something along the lines of hey-there-pretty-lady, the sort of thing American woman are already used to!) and Ripon, our 15 year old guide, started yelling at him, and woman in the village started yelling. Pretty soon he was off the bike and everyone was yelling. It was really astounding how emphatically the people from the village defended us! This morning, while Jesmin interviewed a woman (Dawlat interviews the men in the house at the same time) a man, a stranger to the village, came over and yelled at Jesmin for wasting this woman’s time: “She has to cook so her husband can go to work and her children to school”. He eventually went away, but very bizarre that he did not know this family at all, but still felt it was ok to yell at us.

So, other than these bizarre moments, today was really great. My mother called this morning while we were eating our breakfast (roti (flat bread), diem (egg), dahl (yellow lentils)) at a “hotel” (hotel means restaurant here). It’s funny talking to people on the phone when I’m in public because they notice things I know don’t really even here; for instance she commented on all the honking (we were next to the road) and asked “are there birds around”. Why yes mom, of course there’s a chicken coop right here next to the shops and next to the road. Obviously! 😉

Jon is now working right in a village, so we were invited for lunch. Having me around really takes the pressure off him! I entertained everyone with my photo album (“Amar maa, amar dadi, amar baba, amar choto bhai, amar shohur, amar chacha tabon, amar bondura, amar kukor ….” - my mother, my grandmother, my father, my little brother, my city, my cousin, my friends, my dog). We had a great lunch of rice (baht), beef curry (moja curry ??), and vegetables (shopji) (more parts came in the beef than I was ready for, but Pitu will eat anything so he acted as our dustbin). And dahl, which is served every meal, mostly to flavor the rice.

After the meal I showed the pictures again to even more people and also showed my fruit books (I have books with fruits with Bangla names) to the kids. I spent forever being preened by the women (they even checked me for lice!). They mimed make-up and I shrugged “tik-ache” (ok) wondering what I might be getting into… They came back with a felt tip (the dot) and bright lipstick. They then asked if I would wear a sari (s is pronounced sh, so really it is a shari). I hemmed and hawed, since it was time for us to leave, but then finally said “ok, tik ache”. Turns out the way to get an entire village to shriek and laugh is to agree to be dressed up in a sari.

So I was lead off to one of the rooms with half a dozen women, the door and windows were bolted shut, and they brought out a very fine red and black sari. It is quite complicated how it is folded, of course there are many ways, I believe they dressed me in the “city” fashion. Women normally wear this short shirt under sari’s called a blouse, of course the one they brought really couldn’t be buttoned shut. They did let me leave my t-shirt on, which I was relieved by even if it were improper style, my poor white belly and back are not ready to be exposed to Bangladesh! All this dressing took ages and lots of fussing of course, I was finally allowed to leave and show off to great cheers! It turns out that the top way to make them happy here is to dress is their style. I was worried I looked ridiculous, but, even if I did, they loved it. There are loads of pictures (coming eventuall)!

I tried to take it off to return it, but they insisted I keep it on. I was meeting Dawlat and Jesmin in our village to work again, they were also both so happy to see me dressed like this. And more of the same in the village, instead of feeling like an imposter, I realized that by wearing their clothes they think I look even better than they thought when I was wearing my baggy-appropriate-for-Muslim-country clothes! It was a very nice sari, as well…

Well, I don’t know how I’m going to handle coming home to America and no longer being doted on like this. Perhaps if I wear a sari at home I will draw attention. Most likely not the same sort of attention….

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Comments

[Dori]

Oh my gosh!! I want to see pics of you in the sari!!!!!