Guide to making friends with people from foreign countries

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Apropos of nothing in particular (apart from the fact that Bogota has been boring, cold and rainy so far and I´ve just been to a couple of art galleries and played some basketball), herewith the Liz Bates Official Ways To Make Friends With Foreigners:

Americans: Litter your conversation with words such as "wicked, rubbish, bin, swimming costume, golly, plasters and gumboots". They find this hilarious, they never tire of it, and it´s much easier than thinking up clever jokes or amusing anecdotes that they probably wouldn´t understand anyway.

French: Be as sarcastic as you can.

Dutch: Nothing in particular. They´re just really friendly to everyone with their red cheeks and hearty laughs.

Israelis: Tell them you paid a lot more than they did for exactly the same thing.

Germans: You probably won´t want to bother. If you do, it will be mainly a test of your endurance.

English: Spend however long it takes finding a person/place/A-level/whatever you have in common and then act like this alone is a firm basis for a lasting relationship.

Australians: Brush up on your sporting knowledge.

Canadians: Join them in pointing out all the differences between your own country and the US.

Local men: They´re not interested in just friendship.

Local women: They´re just not interested in friendship.

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Now, any travelling people whom I´ve met and might be reading this, please don´t be offended! If we´ve got the blog-exchanging levels of intimacy, I´m not referring to you.

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Yeah, so, Colombia, whatever. The main reason I´m not keen so far I think is because I´m staying my first dorm room. It stinks, both figuratively and literally. I´m the only girl in a room of six and the shower is rubbish (The Americans are cracking up now..) as well. I hate it when when you go to bed people are sleeping so you have to pad around in the dark and then when you get up people are sleeping so ditto. I want to go to the beach. I´ll try and go the day after tomorrow, though I must make an effort to get to the Salt Cathedral as well. Sorry if I sound like a spoilt brat. Some people don´t know they´re born, eh.

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Comments

[Mon]

an aside
Ok - we are back from the intermarche clutching goodies... where do you want them? Had a great time - slightly quieter than what you are up to - keep it up, love, Mon

[Beamish]

Fantastic! Many, many thanks. To have them waiting for me when I get back to England: 23 Warwick Road, London, W5 3XH. Otherwise, place them in the incapable hands of Donald Ian, from whom I´ll extract them at some point in September. Other people, feel free to send presents too. Come on, Dad, what´s happening with the Barclaycard issues?

[Dad]

barclaycard issues etc
Yes, I've checked and the rainforest poster is indeed still in place in your bedroom. Now then, this barclaycard thing. A missive did pop through the letterbox with something about barclaycard on it but by now it could be a) in the pile of papers for transfer to the tip sometime in the next 6 months b) in the bin c) on the compost heap or d) still on the hall floor where it landed but now lost beneath squash kit, stuff brought back from holiday, boots, shoes, maps, Robert's clothes etc etc. Don't worry though - I will find it and deal with it.

[Mon]

bits
They are on their way to London....

[Beamish]

I have them! Thank you very much.