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Published: November 20th 2006
We got married!
On Friday the 17th of November, we got married on Railay West Beach in south Thailand. Just the two of us, a local pastor conducting the ceremony, three staff from our hotel acting as witnesses and the remaining sunbathing heros still left on the beach after another glorious day in paradise.
The lead up... A - This might be a bit of a surprise to those of you who know us. So perhaps we should explain a little. After we got engaged in Krakow, we started thinking about weddings. We started talking about it after the week long embargo Daren imposed on talking about weddings had passed. And what we began to realise was the huge undertaking a wedding would be. All of Daren's family are in the UK. Much of my family is in New Zealand. Many of our friends live in the UK, and many live in NZ. Having it in either country would make it difficult for important people to be there.
A - So as a joke one day I suggested to Daren that we just get hitched on the beach somewhere along the way. At first we just laughed
it off. But then it started to sound like a better and better idea. Easier to offend everyone equally than leave one or other of our families feeling left out.
D - After waking up in Krakow to a sore head and a grinning Abbie, I realized that I'd proposed. Not wanting to get into the whole logistical nightmare of 'Sponge or Fruitcake', 'Puce or Misty buff for the invitations' and 'we can't sit him on the same table as her', I jokingly suggested we not talk about a wedding as such, while travelling. This was about as easy as sieving concrete, but all kinds of crazy ideas came out. One of the craziest ideas was getting married on the beach at sunset. Who'd do that, eh?
D - The whole consideration of friends and family was at the front of our minds, but I'm sure that everyone will understand the dilemma we faced with getting everyone under one roof. And in hindsight, this was wonderful.
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We started scanning the internet for places that might be able to arrange it for us. (Tim and Lynne - we initially arranged to do it at your honeymoon
spot on Langkawi until we found out that the marriage registration process was going to take too long). We spent many frustrating hours trying to figure out what paperwork would be required for us to get married in Malaysia or Thailand. It did give us an excuse to visit the British Consulates in Beijing and Bangkok and the Malaysian Embassy in Shanghai (where our request for information was sufficiently unusual that we got to deal directly with the Vice Consul - a very quirky individual but that's another story).
We arranged the paperwork before we left for Khon Kaen and picked it up on our way through Bangkok heading south for Krabi. Once we arrived on Railay we asked various hotels if they could arrange it for us. Sand Sea Resort (which is where we are now staying) said they'd be able to do it for us but with major uncertainty about the date. And so began a five day period where we didn't know if it would be happening or not. To avoid disappointment we both assumed it wouldn't happen. Though we did prepare ourselves by going shopping for wedding rings at Ao Nang town one day -
we got lovely matching hand made silver rings for the princely sum of 1600 Bhat. We'll let you do the conversions because it makes them sound really expensive this way!
The BIG day A - The only problem with assuming that it wouldn't happen was that when we were told on the morning of the 17th that we'd be getting married that evening, I wasn't pysched up.
Suddenly some of the wedding traditions that hadn't made sense to me before seemed incredibly sensible. I wanted my Mum and was missing my girl friends so badly. Daren just seemed really relaxed and excited, while I went through bouts of major panic and fear, interspersed with excitement and relief. It was a tense old day.
D - So many superstitions and traditions are attached to the standard wedding ceremony. Not seeing the bride on the big day, something old, something new, painting your nipples blue, etc. Our wedding day comprised of waking up like any other day, having a swim, a bite to eat, watching a couple of hours of CNN and HBO on satellite TV, and finding out at 1pm what was going to happen (if anything at
all). A guys dream. And no mother in law fussing around over small details (I'm sure you wouldn't anyway, Pat), or mad dashes for forgotten rings, flowers, clothing or babies. Not having ANY friends or family there for support was a little tough, but in the end, it couldn't have been easier. And I am now looking forward to drinks and catch ups with nearest and dearest in the future. And yes, I did get married in a skirt.
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We gave ourselves an hour to get ready. It took about 20 minutes. Who needs an hour to tie a sarong and put on a shirt. No hair to be done, no make up, no flowers. We didn't even iron our shirts. Talk about low maintenance.
Then it was off to meet Mr Wasan our celebrant. We hoped to fit in a sneaky G & T before hand but learned too late that our resort didn't have any booze other than beer. Mr Wasan was lovely. He's done loads of work with overseas teams helping out after the Tsunami (there's still loads more than needs to be done, so if anyone is interested in doing that sort
The wedding party
Yep, most Thai's spend the entire day in their jim-jamsof work out here get in touch with us and we'll send you his contact details) and knew plenty of Kiwis and Brits.
We chatted for a bit. Then the sun was starting to get low, so we sauntered off down the beach with our small retinue of witnesses and Mr Samporn, the Sand Sea manager who'd arranged everything and was also acting as our photographer.
We had no idea what the ceremony would consist of before-hand, so we were pretty relieved that it seemed to be the standard wedding ceremony without too much religious content. We exchanged vows without any 'obey' anywhere in sight. And then a reading from the very beautiful (and relevant) letter from First Corinthians 13 (a favorite of my Mum's). The rings went on. Then the crowd went wild. Perhaps it's more accurate to say that we got a round of applause from all the people still loitering around on the beach.
We both smiled and laughed our way through the ceremony. Mr Wasan speaks excellent English, but there are quite a few sounds in English that Thai people find difficult. As such, there were several long moments of silence while we
both tried to decipher exactly what it was we were meant to be repeating after him. Lawful impediments?
After our easy five minutes of photos, we headed down to Rayavadee Resort (the posh five star place down the beach from where we are staying) where we guzzled Champagne and talked about how much we were missing sharing this with our friends and family. And where we tried out those two huge words - husband and wife. It was a lovely spot, looking over the beach as the last light in the sky disappeared, and the perfect way to end our huge day.
The aftermath A - It's been three days now. I'm finally convinced that Daren was right when he said nothing would change. He's still being cheesey. I'm still always right. We've registered our marriage at the Amphur Office in Krabi this morning. This makes it official, legal and binding. We have a wedding certificate all in Thai. I'm too scared to have it translated in case it turns out that I've inadvertently had my name changed by some quirk of Thai law...
D - Like passing an exam, I now have a certificate, for
the easiest, but most meaningful thing I've ever done. I really did believe that I'd never get married, but here I am, a changed man.
Railay
After over 5 months on the road we were both mentally and physically knackered, but we knew we had a few weeks planned to kick back on the beach. Speaking to fellow travellers about where in Thailand to stay, we had loads of recommendations. We settled on Railay, a destination for climbers, with a bit of a chill out vibe. It was a trek to get here, 13 hours on the train from Bankok followed by 4 hours in a coach and 30 minutes in a boat. But it was worth it.
Railay is a peninsula unreachable by roads, and has a distinctly split personality. The west side is all resorts, a golden sandy beach and sunsets. The east side is a backpackers dream, with a running theme of reggae culture and a quiet dope scene, with really friendly locals. However, Railay east has no beach to speak of, the alternative being a 15 minute trek to the west, or a 10 minute woalk to the glorious south beach of
Phra Nang. We've made the most of all aspects by changing hotel three times.
Our days have been spent swimming, mooching around, eating and drinking. A few highlights of our stay were a couple of boat trips, one to Kho Pi Pi - mostly snorkelling opportunities. We also took a long-tail boat out to some islands closer by with a great Canuk (Canadian) couple we met by the pool. The reefs here are great, the variety of fish we were amazed by, even just snorkelling off the beach is a treat. Just energetic enough to work up an appetite for the next meal and the next Bia Chang (the potent local beer).
Where to Next
Tomorrow (Tuesday 21st November) our stay here ends. We'll head to Krabi town then catch a bus down to the Malaysian border. From there we have a rendezvous with the freighter on 29th November, so we plan to head into Malaysia via the west coast and spend a few days in the Cameron Highlands en-route...
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KateOnTheGo
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Congratulations!
This has got to be the best blog i've read in ages. Not to mention the fact that you randomly got married on one of my favourite beaches in the world. If your married life is even half as exciting as its beginning, then you two will be the luckiest people on the planet.